Toxic Family Structure: Narcissist, Enabler, Golden Child, Scapegoat and Lost Child

Toxic Family Structure: Narcissist, Enabler, Golden Child, Scapegoat and Lost Child

In this video, I'm sharing the basics on the toxic family structure - which, for families involving narcissists, is shockingly similar across the board. 

Toxic Family Structure: Narcissist, Enabler, Golden Child, Scapegoat and Lost Child


Who Else Wants a Workout That Reverses Aging?

Who Else Wants a Workout That Reverses Aging?

You probably know that any form of physical activity beats sitting on the couch if you want to look and feel younger. However, some exercises are more effective than others. Researchers from the Mayo Clinic figured out how you can design your workouts to reverse the clock as much as possible in as little time as possible.

The Mayo team tested 3 different exercise programs on men and women under 30 and over 65. After 12 weeks, high intensity interval training (HIIT) proved to be the anti-aging winner, compared to lighter cycling and lifting or strength training alone.

That's because HIIT made changes at the cellular level, enhancing mitochondrial function. Participants over 65 had a 69% increase in their cells' ability to take in oxygen and produce energy, while those under 30 had a 49% boost.

While that might sound a little technical, it means slowing down age-related physical decline, including osteoporosis, arthritis, hypertension, heart conditions, and digestive issues.

Learn how to stay young. Follow these guidelines for a workout program that reverses aging.

High Intensity Interval Training to Fight Aging

1. Understand the concept. High intensity interval training means alternating between short periods of intense exercise and gentler activities. In the Mayo study, this involved 4 minutes of fast cycling followed by 3 minutes of easy cycling repeated 4 times.

2. Be consistent. You'll need to do HIIT regularly to see results. Aim for at least 2 to 3 workouts each week.

3. Proceed gradually. Avoid injuries by giving your body time to adapt. You might start out with just a few minutes of HIIT, and work your way up slowly to 15 or 20 minutes.

4. Rest up. The gentle periods are just as important as the more intense phase. That's when your body becomes conditioned to return to your normal heart rate quickly.

Strength Training to Fight Aging

1. Build muscle. Strength training may not rival HIIT for cellular changes, but it's good at slowing down age-related muscle loss. Otherwise, most adults over 30 lose about 5% each decade.

2. Challenge yourself. Heavier weights and lower repetitions will give you faster results. Try picking the biggest dumbbell that you can lift safely 4 to 8 times.

3. Take time off. Work hard at the gym, but rest between sessions so muscles can heal and grow. Take a day of rest or do other activities like biking or running.

Other Anti-Aging Training Tips

1. Steady yourself. Training for balance will protect you from falls and may help prevent some forms of dementia. Take a yoga class or practice standing on one foot while you brew coffee.

2. Stand tall. Good posture helps you to look younger and puts less strain on your spine. It also enhances bodily functions like respiration, circulation, and digestion.

3. Target your whole body. Include lots of full body exercises in your workout. You'll burn more calories and increase your coordination. Plus, you'll see more gains in functional fitness that prepares you to handle real-life tasks like vacuuming and yard work.

4. Engage your brain. Your mental health matters too. In addition to exercising your brain with word puzzles, try physical activities that make you think, like waltzing or playing tennis.

5. Be social. Connecting with others is like a fountain of youth. Work out with a buddy or go running with your spouse.

Any work out can help you manage your weight and reduce inflammation, but HIIT does more to maintain healthy cell functions as you grow older. Make high intensity interval training part of your formula for fitness and anti-aging.

What to Do When Your Loved One is Suffering

What to Do When Your Loved One is Suffering

Whether your loved one is dealing with an abusive relationship - or an illness, addiction, career change, or other serious issues, it's hard to watch them suffer. You want to wave a magic wand that makes them happy and solves their issues. However, you don't have a magic wand. So what can you do?

When your loved one is struggling, you can help in several ways:

1. Avoid letting your fear take over. You may be incredibly worried and concerned, but fear can make things more difficult. It can cloud your judgment and make you choose the wrong path to help those you care about. Ensure that fear isn't affecting your decisions.

2. Listen to their wishes. Your loved ones may want to talk about big decisions. It's important to refrain from interrupting them or stop the conversation. As their support system, one of the best things you can do is to listen and pay attention to what they want to say.

  • They may say things that are hard to hear. They may discuss how they want to handle their illness or addiction. They may talk about relocating for a new job or trying a different career path.
  • Avoid the impulse to judge, criticize, or argue. Your loved ones need to feel comfortable sharing their thoughts with you. You may be the only support they have right now.

3. Recognize that you can't fix everything. It's tempting to rush around and try to end their suffering, but it's not possible for you to fix everything in someone else's life.

  • Accept the limitations and try to make the best of the situation. Understand that sometimes your loved one needs to be in charge and make their own decisions.

4. Ask for help. You don't have to do everything alone. Asking for help doesn't mean you're weak. Many times, it takes great strength to ask for help.

  • You may be using a great deal of energy to help your loved one. To be at your best, take time to take care of yourself, too. If you're sick, worn out or tired, then you can't be an effective helper.
  • Reach out to others to grow your network of support so you can get help when it's necessary.

5. Be careful how you try to cheer them up. One of your natural responses may be to try to cheer up your loved one. However, this may not work out well. Be sensitive to their emotions.

  • If you try to show them pictures or videos of happier times, they may become sadder.
  • If you try to invite friends over and throw a party, they may feel uncomfortable and out of place.
  • Even comfort food may not be effective in cheering them up. They may be on a special diet or have difficulty eating. Your cooking efforts may be wasted, and you may end up resenting the time you spend making special dishes.
  •  Before you jump in and try to cheer up others, stop and think about how they really feel.

You can reduce the suffering of your loved one. You have the power and the ability to lighten their burden. Try these techniques to help you both get through this challenging time.

28 Things Narcissists Don’t Want You to Know

28 Things Narcissists Don’t Want You to Know


Narcissists wish you would just shut up and do what you're told - or what they expect/want/need from you. They want you to take care of whatever they need, and they expect you to do it without questioning them.

If you don't, they expect you to accept your "punishment" without a single question. They expect you to trust them blindly and you're not allowed to ask questions - even when you have a good reason to ask and even when they've proven to be untrustworthy in the past.

Wanna know how to spot a narcissist? Watch this video. Want to know how to go no contact and stop being codependent? Knowledge is power - grab a cup of coffee and sit down - watch this one. You don't want to miss it. It's all about things narcissists don't want you to know.

In this 4-video compilation, I'll break down 28 things that narcissists don't want you to know about their psychology, their manipulation and their basic disdain for their sources of narcissistic supply.

 

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