Even though I know suffering and pain, I choose to be happy. Even though I have to deal with sadness, I pursue joy.
I realize the most important strategy to achieve happiness is to choose this path.
I make the choice to stay positive during challenges. I choose to focus on the good things despite the negativity around me.
Whatever happens, I am still in control of my emotions.
I get to decide how I feel. I get to select how I react to the words and actions of others. I am responsible for my own happiness.
I know happiness is a conscious decision.
Both my mind and body play a role in the joy I feel. I let go of fear, worry, pain, anxiety, stress, and jealousy. I avoid sorrow and anger. I get rid of resentment before it builds up.
I feed my happy side with positivity.
I pay attention to my judgments, criticisms, or negativity. I notice my moaning and stop it before it affects my happiness. I constantly express gratitude. I see the wonderful things in my life and thank the universe for them. This gratitude increases my joy.
Today, I decide to be happy. I am in control of my emotions and feelings. I choose joy over sadness.
1. How can I stay happy during stressful situations at work, home, or other places,
2. What can I do to maintain my happiness without creating a fake veneer of joy,
3. How can I encourage my family and friends to be more positive,
Your self-image is the way you view yourself. You might view yourself as a parent, construction worker, friend, blonde, sports fan, intelligent, impatient, and middle-aged. But you're more than your career, gender, and age. You're more than your parents' opinion.
You're a unique person with nuances that are unique to you!
When who you are aligns with what you do, you're living authentically. But most of us view ourselves as one way and live another. Authentic people act honestly and congruently.
The benefits of this congruency are enormous: success, self-esteem, respect from others, and inner peace.
Those that live lives misaligned with their values, beliefs, and attitudes suffer from more anxiety, guilt, and shame. It might seem easier to live up to the expectations of others in the short-term, but the long-term costs are significant.
Follow these steps to determine your true self and live life on your terms:
1. Identify your core values. An authentic self-image is one that is aligned with your values. By knowing your values, you'll gain an understanding of what is important to you. Once you're aware of your values, you can build a self-image and life that are more meaningful and enjoyable. Make a list of your values. Create a long list and include everything that you think applies to you. Then, reduce your list to the ten values that are most important to you. You might struggle to narrow your list to just ten, but ten values are plenty.
2. Determine if you have any conflicts. For example, you might say that adventure and freedom are two of your most important values, but what if you also strongly favor responsibility and security, Those values could be in conflict.
When you're faced with an inner conflict, you're likely to shut down and do nothing. If you've ever been paralyzed while making a decision, it's possible your values were in conflict. Think back to when you've struggled to make a decision and see if it's true.
Do you have any values listed that aren't really priorities for you, We often carry around perspectives instilled by our parents. Here's a newsflash: they may have been wrong. Take the time to determine your values for yourself. Disregard what society says you should value. You're an individual.
3. Create an action plan for each value. Imagine one of your values is frugality. You could create a budget and savings plan that incorporates that value. You might plan to start clipping coupons, visit less expensive stores, and search for free entertainment options available on the weekends.
4. Make a list of activities you enjoy that are in alignment with your values. For example, if generosity is a priority, you could find an enjoyable way to spend your time helping others. If health is a value you cherish, you could join a soccer team or a yoga class. Find your favorite sport and participate.
5. Evaluate yourself at the end of each day. Think about the instances when you failed to live according to your values. Likewise, contemplate the times you were able to live according to your values and self-image, particularly when doing so was challenging.
Create a self-image that is in alignment with your values. First, it is necessary to identify and choose your values. Next, construct a life that allows you to live those values consistently and to thrive. Authenticity eliminates many of the common emotional ailments in life, but it's not always the easiest choice.
Be bold enough to choose the person you want to become and live accordingly. The benefits are enormous. What are your values,
How do you deal with living with someone who is giving you the silent treatment? Someone who will co-exist with you in the same house while literally ignoring you? That is what I'm covering in today's video.
Have you ever had to deal with the narcissist's silent treatment? What did you do to cope? Share your thoughts and experiences in the comments section. Let's discuss.
Get my book, "Gaslighting, Love Bombing and Flying Monkeys: The Ultimate Toxic Relationship Survival Guide for Victims and Survivors of Narcissistic Abuse" free through Monday, right here: http://amzn.to/2tS5osp
Between work, home, and social responsibilities, life can be SO hectic! And going through narcissistic abuse recovery, do you often feel that all your time is spent taking care of others? Neglecting self-care is easy in a busy world, but the consequences can be serious. Adding self-care practices to your daily routine can greatly strengthen your health and well-being.
Plus, experts share that the happiest and most successful people regularly focus on self-care!
Try these simple self-care strategies today:
1. Block out time for self-care in your schedule. It's not enough to occasionally stop your busy lifestyle and take a walk or indulge in a hot bath. Self-care is an ongoing process. Just as you reserve time in your schedule for other appointments, set aside time to take care of yourself, too. It's important to adopt self-care habits that you can enjoy on a regular basis. They'll help you avoid burnout, increase your productivity, and allow you to enjoy life.
2. Enjoy your favorite hobby. Whether you love to experiment with new recipes in the kitchen or paint pictures of sunsets, your favorite hobbies can be part of self-care. Hobbies and activities that you already enjoy are easy to select and put into practice. You just have to find room in your schedule to do them. This is an important step and shows your commitment to self-care.
3. Make note of the compliments you receive. You can enjoy this self-care practice even as you work or run errands! Start taking notes of the compliments you receive. You can keep them in a journal, diary, or online folder. Your compliment folder can also include emails, notes, thank you cards, and other things that make you smile. This self-care practice can help you fight negative thoughts. Compliments can serve as reminders that you matter, your existence is important, and someone appreciates you.
4. Remove clutter. Whether you decide to declutter your closet or clean out the fridge, removing clutter will uplift you. Clutter can drain you physically and mentally. It can also make you unhappy as you try to move through your day. Eliminate the things that no longer serve you. For example, if you're keeping clothes in your closet that you hate each time you open the door, replace them with clothes that you love.
5. Do one selfish act. Living selfishly all day isn't recommended, but doing one selfish act that makes you happy can do wonders. You can enjoy just that one thing without feeling guilty about it! If you struggle with self-care, it's often because you spend all of your energy and time taking care of others. There's nothing left in your well for yourself. By taking the time to do one selfish act, such as reading your favorite book or ignoring a boring phone call, you'll be restoring your own importance.
Self-care often takes a backseat to work, family, and other obligations. However, without stopping to take care of your mind and body, you're at risk of burning out and suffering from serious health issues. Start making time for your self-care practices today!
Are you in a relationship with someone who makes you feel crazy and "not good enough" all the time?
Do you find yourself constantly shocked at the outrageously disrespectful behavior and excessive bullying of a friend, family member or co-worker?
Narcissists and people with narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) make you feel worthless and numb, and they leave you wondering if you're even a real person sometimes.
Being involved with a narcissist can be a crazy roller-coaster ride of emotions - from the highest of the highs to the lowest of the lows.
That's because their gaslighting and manipulation tactics are so well-honed and laser-targeted that you often don’t even realize that you’ve become codependent and enmeshed in a toxic relationship until it’s too late.
You're NOT ALONE. I know because I've been there.
The pain of being in a narcissistic relationship is something that you don't get unless you’ve been there, and that’s where I'm uniquely qualified to help you.
See, I'm also a survivor of narcissistic relationships - that's what led me to you today.
That’s what offers me the unique ability to understand, and to offer insight and actionable steps to overcome the horrific emotional abuse and toxic mind games of a narcissist. It's what helps me relate to to my clients and readers so effectively.
You are more powerful than you think. Let me teach you how to stand up for yourself.
Knowledge is power. Admitting the issue is the first step. Next, you'll learn to understand, identify and overcome the behaviors of the narcissist.
That's when you'll - and begin to heal - whether that means inside the relationship or by ending it.
So no more putting band-aids on this problem, alright? Stick with me and we will get this figured out together.
Plus: The Ultimate Resource List for Victims and Survivors of Narcissism