30-Day Home Makeover Challenge: Day 1

30-Day Home Makeover Challenge: Day 1

We are digging into our declutter challenge today! Be sure to sign up here to get the free printables and downloads.

Day 1- The “Spot”

Today’s task is to tackle “the spot”. You know the one. It’s the spot where you dump everything when you come home from work.
For some, it’s that little counter to the side of the fridge. For others, it’s the table in the foyer. It doesn’t matter where it is for you. Just get an empty box and dump everything in it.

Everything.

Wipe “the spot” so that it’s nice and clean. Admire it for a moment.

Ok, now, it’s time to get to work. Set yourself up at the dining room table or your kitchen island.

Now, we’re going to sort through the box.

Make piles for mail, bills, books, things that need to go in other rooms etc. Throw out anything that you don’t need. Once it’s sorted, put each stack in its place.

This really shouldn’t take too long; it only seems overwhelming. Trust me. That’s it. You did it!

Day 1 is complete.

Pat yourself on the back. Better yet, write yourself a note and stick it on the fridge. Remind yourself that you can and will get organized!

Is your clutter a symptom of your abuse?

Is your clutter a symptom of your abuse?


Sign up for the free 30-Day Home Makeover decluttering challenge (CLICK here). We are starting TODAY!

Your Clutter Could Be a Symptom of Your Narcissistic Relationship

Clutter can make you feel stressed and leave you less free time to enjoy your life. But mindfulness can quickly allow you to cut through the clutter (even more than cleaning). Most people hold on to clutter because they assign the possession some kind of emotional significance.

A broken toy wagon might still be in the closet because it was the last toy that a loved one gave a person before they passed away. So the owner of the wagon associates the love with the wagon.

One of the reasons that so many people struggle to get rid of things, both physical and emotional, is because the decluttering process can be painful and overwhelming - especially when you look at it as a whole.

Mindfulness can help you get rid of clutter because it allows you to maintain your focus on one area or one issue at a time that needs to be dealt with. You’ll be able to simplify your life, keep what needs to be kept and let go of what you need to be free from.

Focus only on what truly matters to you. By using mindfulness to help you clear out the clutter, you’ll get rid of stress, too. The things we keep and the emotions we won’t let go of can be reminders of what was.

You might think that if you don’t address them, then you don’t have to deal with these things. But clutter hovers and you sense it in your subconscious. When you let mindfulness help you declutter your life, you’ll be able to maintain a better ability to focus in all areas of your life.

You’ll feel better emotionally when you let go of things. You’ll also be able to find things when you need them instead of searching and getting stressed when you can’t find something.

Plus, you won’t spend as much money buying things that you forgot that you already had. A big benefit with using mindfulness to let go of the clutter is that it does more than give you more room in your home or in your office.

It allows you to let go of the mental and emotional clutter so that you’re able to have a more improved mindfulness, too. For the best results, go through every area of your life one portion at a time and clear out the clutter.

If you’ve always found it too difficult because you think the task is too big, give yourself fifteen minutes a day to focus on the clutter. When you break a task down, you’ll find that it’s easier to do.

38 Red Flags That You’re in an Emotionally Abusive Relationship

38 Red Flags That You’re in an Emotionally Abusive Relationship

Are you walking on eggshells in your relationship? Do you feel like you're always on alert - worrying that your partner, friend or family member will become angry, upset or otherwise unhappy with you?

If so, you might be in an emotionally abusive relationship - and you could be dealing with a narcissist or someone with narcissistic personality disorder.

In this video, I'll share 38 signs that you could be in an emotionally abusive relationship.

It's not breaking the eggs that does the lasting harm; it’s the continual walking on  eggshells. Emotional damage has a way of lingering in the times between resentful, angry, or abusive flare-ups. The empty, dull ache of unhappiness is most accurately measured in the accumulative effect of these small moments of disconnection, isolation and dread.

Co-Dependent Narcissist Relationships: Identifying Codependency

Co-Dependent Narcissist Relationships: Identifying Codependency



Victims of narcissism often call themselves “people-pleasers” or “diplomats,” but the truth is, they are often so downtrodden in relationships that they just become changed, reactive versions of their former selves.

When you hear someone use the word “codependent,” often the first thing you think about is someone who is in a relationship with an alcoholic or drug addict. That’s because the term was developed specifically for this kind of relationship – initially.

“Codependency” is defined as an unhealthy relationship where partners are overly reliant on one another. As a result, a dysfunctional pattern of living and problem-solving develops between the two.

Codependency and Narcissism in Relationships: A Toxic Combo

As you might expect, this is also a common phenomenon among people who are in relationships with narcissists. This is because the narcissist has such unreachable standards in any relationship that the “supply” is treated as an extension of the narcissist’s self, when it’s convenient – and as nothing, when it’s not.

When two people have a very close relationship, it’s natural and mentally healthy to depend on each other for certain things. However, if one of you loses sight of who you are, in order to please only the other person, the relationship can become very unhealthy. One of the most troubling relationship elements is codependency.

A Quick Easy and Cheap Place to Live When You Leave Your Narcissist

A Quick Easy and Cheap Place to Live When You Leave Your Narcissist

Here's A Quick Easy and Cheap Place to Live When You Leave Your Narcissist!

What's one thing that's holding you back from leaving a narcissist? Often, it's because you have nowhere to go. One of our morning chat people had a smart idea for where to live - and I had to share it with you! 

Free PLAN to leave a narcissist: http://queenbeeing.com/span

 

Halloween Costume Idea #2 – Transformers: The Last Knight Costumes

Halloween Costume Idea #2 – Transformers: The Last Knight Costumes

Ever since the line of toys was released in the 1980s, Transformers have been wildly popular among young children. The toys became so popular that there were multiple animated series, animated films, and most recently, live action films.

Starting in 2007, Michael Bay has directed many extremely popular live action Transformer films, and his final installment, The Last Knight, was released in the summer of 2017.

It’s no surprise to anyone, then that there are many kids out there who now want to dress up as the Transformers for Halloween, whether it be the newer live action versions or the old animated versions.

Easily the most popular character among the young boys who love Transformers is the protagonist, Optimus Prime. Optimus prime is easily recognizable, being the red and blue Transformer with a uniquely shaped helmet.

You can also see the front of the truck that Optimus Prime transforms into as his chest plate. Optimus Prime outfits come in various levels of detail, ranging from printed on fabric jumpsuits with half masks to 3D full mask highly detailed costumes.

You can also get costumes that look more like the characters from the 1980s, 1990s, and early 2000s cartoon shows instead of the live action movies. The other well-known character in the Transformers franchise is Optimus Prime’s sidekick, Bumblebee.

Bumblebee is a smaller, primarily yellow Transformer who works alongside Optimus Prime and was featured extensively in the live action movies. Much like the Optimus Prime costumes, there are various levels of detail in Bumblebee costumes.

Some of the costumes also have padded muscles, while others are more standard form fitting. Some of the masks available cover the entire face, while others leave large eye and mouth holes, allowing for more comfort.

For the most comfort, you can even get simple hoodies and pants styled after Bumblebee’s design. To complete any good Transformers costume, you’re going to want to add accessories.

For example, you could add the sword and shield that Optimus Prime used in the fourth Transformers movie. Both are molded from plastic, so they’re light enough to carry around and aren’t dangerous.

You could also add Bumblebee’s hand cannon to your Bumblebee costume, which is well padded on the inside for comfort, and slips on over your child’s hand. You can also add gloves that resemble the rest of the Transformer’s design, so you don’t have regular human hands sticking out and contrasting with the mechanical looking costume.

Halloween Costume Idea: Wonder Woman

Halloween Costume Idea: Wonder Woman

You may or may not know this about me, but Halloween is one of my FAVORITE holidays! It's fun and silly and my kids love it. Every year, my family throws a huge Halloween costume party for all of our friends. This year, I'm doing a special series here on QueenBeeing for the month of October - Halloween costume ideas!

Today, we're starting with Wonder Woman - for what I think are obvious reasons. Let's do this!

Wonder Woman Costumes

Wonder Woman was one of the most popular movies of 2017, having been received very well by both critics and audiences alike. Naturally, many people want to dress up as the iconic comic book heroine for Halloween.

There are many options for costumes for girls - ranging from very modest ones for kids up through more daring ones for adults. There are also different versions of Wonder Woman to dress up as, given that she’s changed her outfit over time.

There are plenty of premade costumes out there, but you can create your own based on your favorite version of Wonder Woman as well. One of the most popular versions of the costume will be the one from the 2017 movie featuring Gal Gadot.

This version of the Wonder Woman outfit is much more sleek and modern, while retaining all of the iconic symbols. One of the most important parts is her tiara. It’s one of her most iconic parts of her outfit, and it’s been on every version of her.

Another important part of her outfit is her metal gauntlets. Next, there’s her dress, which consists of a red corset upper part and a short blue lower part. Finally, there’s her tall, red boots, which come up just below her knees.

There are many different styles to pick from to suit your interests. If you prefer a more modest costume, you can get one with a classic long blue skirt with white stars, reminiscent of the American flag.

You can also get ones more like the original Wonder Woman outfit, with short starred shorts and a corset. For the more comfort minded, you can get a t-shirt that resembles her corset without feeling so restrictive.

You can also get leggings to match instead of wearing a skirt or shorts, if weather and temperature is a concern. Wonder Woman costumes can be found for every age and size, from infants to adults.

Infant outfits are typically onesies with the design of Wonder Woman’s outfit printed on them. There’s also toddler outfits, young teenager outfits, and of course, full grown woman outfits.

In addition to you outfit, you might want to add some accessories to really pull the whole costume together. For example, you might want to bring Wonder Woman’s iconic Lasso, which is usually golden. You can also get replicas of the sword and shield that Wonder Woman wielded in Dawn of Justice and the 2017 film.

What is your ethical obligation to the new narcissistic supply?

What is your ethical obligation to the new narcissistic supply?


Are you ethically required to warn your ex's new source of narcissistic supply?

Your Ex Narcissist's New Supply: Is there an ethical obligation to warn new supply of toxic abuse?

Today, I'm answering a question from a viewer who believes that we have an ethical obligation to warn the narcissist's new source of narcissistic supply that he or she may be abused. Here's the comment:

jeffry michineau commented:
"I think the view that we should just sit by and watch the new victim be torn to shreds is like supplying the narc. we only say this from the point of view of being former victims... you see it was we who allowed and fueled these creatures.. then sheepishly cow under all of their next bombing campaigns.. psychological bloodshed and the havoc they are creating in our social family circles,, why because of the after effects of our own victimhood.. we forget about our humanitarian... technical or even our highly acclaimed communication skills... and just give in to these midget brained quasi emotional rapist and toxin squirting manipulators.. that are on the hollywood elite actors list of most evil creatures... I think we could with our own artfulness say or do something just respond to them with well thought out defenses otherwise we would be just a bunch of losers licking our wounds and succumbing to the machinations of the Devil's children...otherwise called Narcissists"

25K Subscribers, Giveaways and a Free eBook

25K Subscribers, Giveaways and a Free eBook


Thank you for subscribing! Here's a bit of my journey - and a free gift for you. Plus, I'll fill you in on the giveaway stuff happening in SPAN to celebrate!

Your Gift:
Navigating No Contact with a Narcissist (Kindle) http://amzn.to/2yK75LM
Kindle App for any device - free - http://amzn.to/2wXwDmA

Navigating No Contact with a Narcissist (Paperback) http://amzn.to/2xH5AiR

My mission to help survivors of narcissistic abuse in toxic relationships to discover, understand and overcome the abuse - and then to create the lives they truly want and deserve - including how to avoid narcissists in the future and how to use the law of attraction to your benefit in recovery.

Every day, I learn something new, something that makes my life just a little bit better. I have learned how to use intentional thoughts and to choose my perception in order to bring about positive changes in my life, almost without fail. It really is “all in your head" and that is just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to what i like to call "toxic relationship rehab."

While I've been writing about this topic since 2006, including several books on and around it, I only started posting on YouTube in 2016. (I did have a few random videos before that were unrelated, though.) I've been learning something new literally every day about how to better serve my audience, and that is in part thanks to the amazing community of YouTubers who actively share their knowledge on how to be most effective on the platform.

YouTube has literally changed my life and transformed my business already! I tell everyone I know they should try it.
Since my channel became a channel in 2016, I've been able to drop all of my "side hustles" and focus on my passion: helping people make their lives better by first helping them to identify a narcissists and their toxic abuse (which is hard to detect but incredibly dehumanizing - so many people are SHOCKED when they realize what's happening).

Psychology of the Addicted Narcissist: Are NPD and Addiction Connected?

Psychology of the Addicted Narcissist: Are NPD and Addiction Connected?


Are narcissistic personality disorder and drug/alcohol/gambling (etc) addiction connected? In this video, I'll fill you in on whether they are connected, how many narcissists are also known to be addicts and much more.

Plus, i'll tell you how to deal with a narcissistic addict and how to tell if someone is both a narcissist AND and addict, or just an addict. I'll also discuss how to get a narcissist in rehab and what to say to a narcissist to get one to go to rehab.

Plus, I'll tell you what to do if you can't get the NPD addict to try rehab or recovery to start their own healing from their "drug of choice."