When you make the decision to file for divorce on your own, you will realize quickly that there are a lot of things that have to be done. Once the court has the paperwork, your next step is to get your spouse served. Some states have process servers and some states just have law enforcement serve them. But the good news is that it is not something you will have to do. I worked with a process server and my husband was served within hours of me filing the paperwork because I knew that he was leaving the state and things would be a lot harder as well as expensive with him so far away.
He did call me after he was served and assured me I would get my answer. Of course, I am still waiting. There is a time limit for your spouse to answer the petition and it is usually 20 days or less, but if they miss that deadline, then your case will go into default and you will more than likely get what you’ve asked for. It does take a little longer to do it all on your own and without the other party participating but the savings and lack of contact make it worth it.
There will be a case management hearing; I had two, so that the court can make sure that you have all of your paperwork in its entirety and that you have done everything you needed to do. If your spouse is involved in the divorce they will be there also.
If you can both agree on the terms of the divorce, it goes a little quicker. But if not, just do your best to relax and know that it will come to an end sooner than later.For example, I filed for divorce January 10 and my final hearing was supposed to be August 24th (this didn’t go as planned, so the new final hearing October 8, 2018). It has been a long wait but I can finally see the light at the end of the tunnel.
We were both court-ordered to take a parenting class in order for the divorce to go through. Some states make it mandatory and some don’t. Most states want you to take the class in person but if there is some reason you can not attend an in-person class you can file a motion with the courthouse and ask the judge to approve you taking the online class but you will have to have a reason other than you do not want to. Because of my anxiety and C-PTSD, being in a room full of strangers while I was still stuck with the verbal and mental abuse was not an option. I actually took the class first and asked for permission later. Luckily my judge was understanding and it was accepted.
Now to start the waiting game. There will be a lot of that. My county has a web page for the clerk’s office that you can look at to see the activity on your case. Every page you filed is on there and you can keep an eye on it to see if your spouse has done their part.
Divorce is stressful any way you go about it. Know that you are a survivor and this is just another bump in the road. You have overcome so much more. Good luck SPANily! I look forward to hearing about your experiences along the way. You never know who your experience can help.
Check out our new sister site, Divorce Your Narcissist for more resources and information on divorcing your narcissist.
While it’s very customizable, and you’re certainly welcome to change things around,
In this article, I will walk you through the setup for a traditional bullet journal as first introduced by Ryder Carroll from BulletJournal.com. Use it as a starting point, get comfortable with the basic system and then change it from there.
You’ll need a notebook, a pen, and a little bit of time to get started. The type of notebook you use is up to you. The traditional style is grid or dotted paper, but I find even ruled or blank pages work just fine.
Okay, once you’ve got all that together, you’ll want to know how to set it up. Here is a really fast overview.
The first page of your bullet journal will include your key. This will record the shorthand you use for your bullet entries.
Here is my Bullet Journal key – and if you scroll down below it, you’ll see the more traditional one. That’s what I love about this system – it’s so very flexible. It’s part of why it works for me!
Here’s the traditional codes used. Feel free to add to it, or modify it as needed.
ᐧ (Dot) Task
X Completed Task
> Migrated Task
⬤ Completed Appointment
⟴ Migrated Appointment
Your next two to four pages will be set aside for indexing. This will allow you to quickly find any collection, or get to a particular month. Title each page as an index page and move on to the next section.
The Future Log
With the original bullet journal setup this is a two page spread that records the coming 6 months. Many bullet journalers find it helpful to use a more traditional yearly calendar instead. This is a great place to record birthdays, anniversaries, or block out vacation time. Add or note the page number and record your future log in your index.
Start each month with a monthly log. Here you’ll record appointments and due dates. You can use a grid layout, or use one line for each day of the month. While this isn’t where you’ll track most of your tasks, the monthly log will come in handy for those times when you have a dentist appointment or your daughter is invited to a friend’s birthday party.
The daily log is where you’ll spend most of your time in the journal. Start a new section each day and record anything important for the day. Make your list of tasks and cross them off as you get them finished. Make notes of anything important you need to remember throughout the day as well as appointments as they pop up. Everything gets logged in the daily log for speed and ease. From there you can move it as needed to the monthly or future log, or migrate it to a different day.
At the end of your day, or first thing the next morning it’s time to review your tasks and cross out and migrate anything that isn’t checked off. For example, if you didn’t get around to doing laundry today, draw an arrow through it and add the task to today’s daily task list. If you noted an appointment that came up yesterday, move it to your monthly list and draw an arrow through it in yesterday’s list. If something no longer applies then cross it out. Your goal is to deal with each entry from your daily list by completing it, migrating it, or crossing it out.
The final part of the puzzle is collections. These are basically thematic lists you make that aren’t date related. A perfect example is a list of books you want to read. Start the list on the next blank page. Title it and start jotting down the books you want to read. Make a note of the page you’re on and add this collection to your index page. Now when you want to add a new book title to this list, or reference it to see what you want to read, you can easily find it via the index.
A bullet journal is a great way to stay productive at work, at home, or in school. Just about anyone can benefit from bullet journaling from college students to busy working moms. If you feel like you don’t have enough hours in the day to get everything done you want to accomplish, use a bullet journal to help you plan and prioritize
As you make out your daily tasks lists, you have to think about what you should be working on. This makes you plan ahead and think things through instead of sitting at your desk doing busy work. A little bit of planning can help you make progress that much faster and it will boost your overall productivity. If you find daily to-do lists helpful, give bullet journaling a try as a way to get even more productive faster.
Some people find it helpful to make out their next day’s task list at the end of the day. Others prefer to make out their list first thing in the morning, while they are drinking coffee and getting ready for the day. Both are valid approaches. Give both a try and see what works for you.
Once you have your daily tasks recorded, you’ll be motivated to work on checking them off. This will greatly increase your productivity in several different ways. The first is that you know exactly what you should be working on. You won’t waste time figuring out what your next step is, or sit there and watch cat videos instead of doing something productive.
The daily list of tasks will also make you push just a little harder to make sure everything gets done before you call it a day. Try it and see how much more you can get done in a day with a daily list in your bullet journal.
The Bullet Journal Is A Great Record To Help You Reflect
Last but not least, the bullet journal is a great record of what you’ve been doing on a daily basis. Set aside a little time to look through your notes at the end of the week or the month. Reflect on what’s working and what isn’t. Where do you need to work harder, what can you stop doing. Use the record your bullet journal gives you to improve your processes and tasks. It will make you better at your job, in school, and at home. Use it as a personal and professional improvement tool.
If you think you might have a book in you and you want to know how to get paid to write ebooks each month, you’re going to want to try this free Kindle ebook author training I’m doing tomorrow, Friday November 3 – see it and sign up right here.
Free training on how I make money every month on Amazon and Kindle – and how you can too – coming Friday, Nov. 3, 2017!
As the author of more than 20 books and ebooks, many of which you can see at BooksAngieWrote.com, I’m often asked how I managed to write so many books and how I can keep making money from them every month.
Since so many people ask me, I’m working on a new free training for people who want to do it too – are you one of them?
Do you want to write Kindle eBooks and make monthly royalties on your work?
Drink garnishes are a fun way to dress up a glass, but they can also be edible, healthy, and delicious! The next time you have a party or other gathering, try these healthy ideas. Your guests will appreciate them.
1. Lemon slices. Lemon slices are a popular, classic drink garnish. They’re also good for you. You get a boost of vitamin C and a sour edge at the same time.
They’re fun to eat and not expensive, so you can use them freely.
2. Apple slices. They’re not as common, but apple slices are a delicious garnish for drinks, whether you’re serving alcoholic or nonalcoholic beverages.
Apples go great with champagne by adding an interesting tartness to the flavor. They also go well with ciders and other types of drinks.
You may want to stick with red apples since they’re sweeter.
3. Pomegranate seeds. Break open a pomegranate and you’ll see plenty of seeds. Pomegranate seeds have multiple vitamins and minerals. They’re also bright red and add an interesting touch of color to plainer drinks.
For each drink, use only a small amount of the seeds, so your guests aren’t overwhelmed by them. Keep in mind that these seeds float to the top of beverages.
4. Fig slices. It’s an unusual choice, but fig slices are a fun garnish for drinks. They have a reddish purple interior. They have fiber and other vitamins, so your guests will be getting something colorful and healthy with their drinks.
Figs are sticky and sweet, so it’s a good idea to be careful with how many figs you use.
5. Other fruit ideas. In general, fruit is one of the easiest things to use for garnishes when you’re putting together your drink menu. Bananas, pineapples, mangoes, berries, kiwis and other fruits make good additions.
Fruit is best served as slices or wedges to make them easier for your guests to eat. You can make triangular or other shapes, too. This is an opportunity to get creative and use the garnishes as both food and decoration.
Although fruit tends to be a popular choice, it’s not your only option.
Try these ideas:
1. Edible flowers.Zucchini flowers are beautiful, orange in color, and make great drink additions. Ensure they’re clean and ready to be eaten before you use them.
What are you getting Dad or Grandpa for Father’s Day this year? Every year, Father’s Day rolls around and it’s time to celebrate dads of all kinds – including granddads, expectant dad and stepdads. But it can be really hard to shop for men on this holiday, right?
Between the “guy who has it all” and the dad who is hard to buy for, you might be feeling a little panicked when it comes to choosing the right gift. But don’t worry – we’ve got you covered with this ultimate guide to gift-giving on Father’s day 2017!
You want to do something special for the men in your life, but it can be a challenge deciding which gift would be best. And, of course, you have budget considerations, right? So, if you’re anything like me, it helps to have a few gift suggestions that will appeal to many different types of men. You’re sure to find something that’s in your price range and make the perfect Father’s Day gift.
You with me? Let’s DO this!
From things you can buy and wrap in a flash to homemade items and activities, there’s something for everyone (and every budget!) here. What you have to do is figure out which of these ideas the man in your life would appreciate most!
Frames are wonderful gifts for storing family photos. Dads especially like photo frames they can take to the office or keep in a treasured space at home. If you purchase a standard frame, make sure to put a family photo inside.
If Dad is into hunting, fishing, or sports, you can look for a themed frame that reflects his favorite hobbies. Digital frames are another great gift – and men who are into gadgets love them. Upload several photos of the kids with Dad before giving this gift.
We usually think of giving flowers on Mother’s Day, but some men like to receive flowers, too. For Father’s Day you can purchase arrangements with a masculine touch such as a bouquet that looks like a boat or a toy car used as a vase.
You can also purchase a gift card to his favorite restaurant or arrange to bring in his favorite meal that day. Being able to take the day off from cooking after a long week can be a huge relief.
If you prefer to stay home for Father’s Day, you can buy all of the ingredients for his favorite meal and make it for him. He’ll be sure to appreciate your time and efforts to prepare something special.
One great gift idea is to order a special package of Omaha steaks. You can get just the steaks, or add on hot dogs, lobster, and side dishes, too. Or, you could find a company that sends him a monthly gift, like a good coffee or even beer of the month, for example.
A gift basket can allow you to give a variety of items all in one special package. Gift baskets can include foods, coffee, beer, wine, gift certificates, and anything else that the man in your life might like.
The best gift baskets have themes. A few themes to consider include:
Men who enjoy hunting are always happy to get accessories to go with their sport. This is a great time to give a luxury item he might not buy for himself, but he’d love to have on his next hunting or fishing trip.
You can check in on his existing gear and see if any of it is worn and torn. Hunters are hard on their equipment and gadgets. If you see something that could be replaced, look for a newer model to upgrade him to!
You can find a watch to meet just about any need or budget. Men can always use another watch to go with their wardrobe. This is a timeless gift (pun absolutely intended!) and your pop will enjoy for years and years.
If he already has a collection of watches, you might consider getting him a nice watch case that showcases his collection with a glass top and leather sides. These organizers help display the watches so he can grab them quickly and store the ones not in use.
There are many other gifts you can get Dad on Father’s day, including:
Winning Gift Tip: Just listen to what he’s always talking about (sports teams, TV shows, etc.) and try to find a gift that fits his preferences. He’ll love the fact that you’ve picked up on it without him having to put in a request.
While store bought gifts are always an option, there’s nothing more personal than something handmade by you or your child for a special dad. These one of a kind gifts will warm his heart and let you know how much you love him and think about him.
Handprint crafts are a wonderful way to freeze a moment of time. Over the years you can see how much your children have grown by looking at the growth from tiny hands to those of a teen and adult.
You can purchase kits to make and decorate a hand imprint in plaster. This can serve as a lifelong memory of a sweet time in your child’s life. Handprints can also be used to create art that looks like animals or to decorate plates.
Making a simple handprint with paint on paper and framing it makes a wonderful gift as well. Handprints are so special because no two are alike. They serve as a reminder of the unique child celebrating his Dad.
You can also make a scrapbook all about the kids and their dad. Allow them to write special messages, include photos, and have them draw pictures of the times they’ve spent with him. This is a one of a kind gift that he’ll love.
Kids can make coupon books to give for Father’s Day. This can include special coupons for doing extra chores, helping their dad with a special project, making his favorite meal or just spending time together.
This is a very inexpensive idea that can be adapted to fit any family. You can hand write the coupons and put them in a booklet or envelope. Then when he’s ready to redeem one, he can take it out of the book and turn it in.
If you have a man in your life who is about to become a father, you can write a special letter from your unborn baby to him. When writing this letter, think about all of the qualities you think will make him a great dad.
This can be a fun way to let him know he’ll be a father if he doesn’t know yet or to give him a reminder of how much you love him and of the exciting new life changes that are coming.
You might also consider scanning the sonogram pictures and putting them in a digital photo frame so that he can see them ahead of time. The 3D and 4D images that have color are great, too!
Sharing a meal together is a great way to celebrate any holiday. Moms usually get breakfast in bed, but dads like it, too! Make his favorite breakfast foods and treat him to a breakfast he’ll enjoy.
If you have a big family with many dads, you can also consider hosting a Father’s Day Brunch. Invite the extended family over for a brunch featuring egg dishes, ham, biscuits, or even go with a Mexican themed breakfast – including tortillas and salsa.
Ask guest to bring a side dish and present all the dads with a special gift or card. If you’d rather not have to clean your house and prepare a big meal, you’ll find that many restaurants host special Father’s Day brunches.
This is a great way to share a meal while leaving the cooking and cleaning to someone else. If you decide to go to a restaurant, make sure you call ahead. Some restaurants only take reservations on special days.
You should also ask about the menu. On a busy holiday many restaurants will opt for a buffet or a set menu to accommodate the crowd. You don’t want to get turned away at a restaurant when you’re ready to celebrate.