When Narcissists Use Religion to Control You

When Narcissists Use Religion to Control You


Are you dealing with religious abuse or spiritual abuse from a narcissist? If so, you're not alone. Narcissists are infamous for using religion to manipulate, control and absolutely dominate you through fear of what will happen to you if you don't do what they want.

In this video, Narcissists and Religious Abuse (AKA Spiritual Abuse): When Narcissists Use Religion to Control You, I'll define religious abuse and outline how narcissists use it against you.

The official definition of religious/spiritual abuse:
Religious abuse is abuse administered under the guise of religion, including harassment or humiliation, which may result in psychological trauma. Religious abuse may also include misuse of religion for selfish, secular, or ideological ends such as the abuse of a clerical position.

109 Things You Can Stop Worrying About When You Go No Contact with a Narcissist

109 Things You Can Stop Worrying About When You Go No Contact with a Narcissist

You know what you gain when you leave the narcissist. But what will you lose? Everyone's always telling you how much better life will be when you leave a narcissist right? They tell you what you'll gain - your freedom, your peace, etc.

But they never tell you exactly what you'll lose when you go no contact or when you break up with the narcissist. In this video, I'll tell you 109 things that you lose when you lose the narcissist.

  1. No more of not having anyone to share in your accomplishments or appreciate your talents, because the narc doesn’t want to share the limelight.
  2. being able to express your opinion without being accused of wanting to argue.
  3. being able to have a collection and not be called a hoarder.
  4. being able to be tired or sick without someone being pissed off because you're not taking care of them.
  5. Being able to watch tv!
  6. Being able to play Xbox!
  7. Being allowed to stay up as long as you want to!
  8. Not having to explain why your interests are not weird!
  9. Being able to have an interest!
  10. Being able to have a holiday that's not ruined, or a birthday!
  11. No more hiding from the neighbors, so they can’t ask you questions!
  12. Being allowed to raise your kids lovingly without paying the consequences!
  13. Being able to say what I like and want matters!
  14. no more tears and confusion!
  15. No more name calling
  16. No more narcissists saying they are playing when confronted
  17. No more hearing, “If I don't give you a hard time, who will?”
  18. not having your immune system damaged, lowered, compromised and destroyed leading to depression, illnesses and death.  If the narc has financial incentives to see you dead, it all adds up.
  19. - no more lies
  20. - no emotional blackmail
  21. - no more narc rage
  22. - no more emotional abuse
  23. - no more discouraging you
  24. - no more constant fault finding
  25. - no more confusion
  26. No more of that feeling of terror just before and during a physical attack.
  27. No more getting abuse for looking the wrong direction
  28. No more catching a disease from the narc and then s/he's jealous because you are getting medical attention for said disease.
  29. Fearing for my life and the life of my pet.
  30. Fearing his or her calling the police on me for breaking the peace because I'm crying over her/his raging.
  31. Watching him destroy the lives of his/her kids.
  32. Having his ex-wife and another female friend in my bedroom, as I sleep or not.
  33. Not having any of my things welcome in the home s/he wants me to share with him/her.
  34. Not being stopped when I want to visit with family.
  35. Not being stopped from sleeping all night, and not being stopped when I've decided I'm tired.
  36. Not being forced to watch filth on tv and video.
  37. No more “Hurry! Go to bed your dad's home!" and yelling at my children so he didn't.
  38. No more dealing with a narcissist crushing/making fun of your goals and dreams
  39. No more buying things for yourself and having them get broken
  40. No more defending myself of BS.
  41. No more starting every conversation with "now please don't get pissed, but…”
  42. No more hearing a narcissist criticize my voice on phone calls and say they knew something was wrong.
  43. No more having my quietness evaluated or being criticized for "a look a narcissist claimed I had"
  44. No more being teased about my eyes.
  45. No more being criticized about my looks.
  46. No more hearing that I was a big girl; or being asked how much I weighed.
  47. No more walking on eggshells
  48. No more narcissist acting like they want to see you out of kindness but they’re broke, need food, need bus money/ a ride, and need clean laundry and play it like they’re doing you a favor by gracing you with their awesome company
  49. No more escalating violence because she knows the law is on a female’s side and guys are guilty until proven innocent.
  50. No more watching the narcissist check out young men/women half my age and then blaming me for paranoia.
  51. No more sheer terror over uncovering complex lies, betrayal and deceit.
  52. No more being fearful for my life over discovering the lies.
  53. No more being lied about to police officers and being falsely thrown into jail for a day.
  54. No more starving literally for love and food.
  55. No more flying monkey shit head dumb ass fucks.
  56. No more trauma.
  57. No more gaslighting.
  58. No more being threatened to be homeless.
  59. No more stupid idiots surrounding me making me stupider emotionally and intellectually.
  60. No more having my shit stolen.
  61. Not having to worry that the narcissist isn't answering the phone on break time and learning later that they were in the car with someone else of the opposite sex.
  62. No more porn in the DVD, on the computer, under the bed, in the shed, on top of the cupboard, in our caravan, in his truck, bedside drawer, on his phone, on his work computer.
  63. No more paranoia about where the narcissist is at
  64. No more finding Viagra in his car, stripper cards hidden in the kitchen and the proclamations "dindu nuffin"
  65. No more caring what his/her stupid followers think of me and wondering what I have done now for all the negative judgements.
  66. No more having to be a designated driver because the narc will always get drunk &/or stoned to "have a good time”.
  67. No more being called too sensitive
  68. No more cyber stalking
  69. no longer being told you need to go to church
  70. No more having to get tested for aids
  71. No more being ditched on holidays
  72. No more having to cancel everythingything
  73. No more contact!
  74. Being glad to be alive now that I know how to identify these beasts.
  75. Not having to deal with the narcissist’s screams at midnight or later, waking up all the neighborhood, just because I told them something they didn't like or I told them if they didn't change, I would leave.
  76. Not being abused anymore, like an object, with no emotions, no love, no feelings.
  77. Not having to deal anymore with the devastation in my kid's eyes because the narcissist didn't keep theirpromises towards them. or toward me.
  78. No more having to pretend I’m dumb and that I believed the lies.
  79. No more bending over backwards trying to please my narcissist ex
  80. No more being ignored after sex even if you did everything just the way the narcissist wanted.
  81. No more feeling so alone and unloved and finally realizing you thought you were sharing your soul, but to the narcissist, the act had no meaning.
  82. No more being just an "appliance" the narcissist used.
  83. No more being repeatedly discarded.
  84. No more being looked at with dead or empty eyes.
  85. No more not ever being apologized to.
  86. No more having to share your life and living space with a complete and total monster.
  87. No more having to “loan” the narcissist money.
  88. No more having to prove myself and being afraid of expressing myself
  89. No more getting in trouble for missed days at work during discards and devalues
  90. No more fearing their mood swings.
  91. No more turning down friends invites for dinner fearing the narcissist would get jealous.
  92. No more head games.
  93. No more being accused of having someone in bed with me when the narcissist would call.
  94. No more feeling nervous when they would drive 100 mph and hearing the narcissist was a good driver and that cars are made to drive fast blah blah blah)
  95. No more thinking I'm crazy.
  96. No more being called horrible names.
  97. No more getting the silent treatment and no more of me being blamed for leaving
  98. No more hearing that "I don't try hard enough and I should've hugged the narcissist"
  99. No more crying and not being able to wear makeup.
  100. No more fearing to shave my legs because that meant I "went out" the night before.
  101. No more being forced to do things when I wasn't feeling up to it.
  102. No more cringing when he/she would walk out of stores without paying for stuff.
  103. No more babysitting the narcissist’s kid even though they were awful the night before.
  104. No more being told that medicine is bad and that I shouldn't take Advil or Excedrin meanwhile (when the narc did drugs) 😏
  105. No more hearing the narcissist brag about how good they are at their job and without them, they are all probably dying of boredom.
  106. No more lying to my kids as to why I'm crying (that still hurts)
  107. No more of the narcissist’s stupid "I'm so spiritual" speeches yet they didn't know what the hell they were talking about.
  108. No more broken promises.
  109. No longer being accused of everything that goes wrong in the world.
Narcissists and Jealousy: The Reasons, the Triggers and the Effects on Supply

Narcissists and Jealousy: The Reasons, the Triggers and the Effects on Supply


Narcissists are well-known for their gaslighting, manipulation and drama - and often, their efforts to make you jealous. But did you know they also get insanely jealous at times? And do you know why that happens? In this video, I'll fill you in on why a narcissist gets jealous and what exactly triggers that - plus, how a narcissist's jealousy affects YOU.

Codependency 101: Discover, Understand and Overcome Codependency

Codependency 101: Discover, Understand and Overcome Codependency


If you are or ever have been in a relationship with a narcissist, chances are that you might be codependent. In this video, I'll fill you in on what that means and how to overcome it. And my friend? You CAN overcome it - I promise.

 

38 Red Flags That You’re in an Emotionally Abusive Relationship

38 Red Flags That You’re in an Emotionally Abusive Relationship

Are you walking on eggshells in your relationship? Do you feel like you're always on alert - worrying that your partner, friend or family member will become angry, upset or otherwise unhappy with you?

If so, you might be in an emotionally abusive relationship - and you could be dealing with a narcissist or someone with narcissistic personality disorder.

In this video, I'll share 38 signs that you could be in an emotionally abusive relationship.

It's not breaking the eggs that does the lasting harm; it’s the continual walking on  eggshells. Emotional damage has a way of lingering in the times between resentful, angry, or abusive flare-ups. The empty, dull ache of unhappiness is most accurately measured in the accumulative effect of these small moments of disconnection, isolation and dread.

Co-Dependent Narcissist Relationships: Identifying Codependency

Co-Dependent Narcissist Relationships: Identifying Codependency



Victims of narcissism often call themselves “people-pleasers” or “diplomats,” but the truth is, they are often so downtrodden in relationships that they just become changed, reactive versions of their former selves.

When you hear someone use the word “codependent,” often the first thing you think about is someone who is in a relationship with an alcoholic or drug addict. That’s because the term was developed specifically for this kind of relationship – initially.

“Codependency” is defined as an unhealthy relationship where partners are overly reliant on one another. As a result, a dysfunctional pattern of living and problem-solving develops between the two.

Codependency and Narcissism in Relationships: A Toxic Combo

As you might expect, this is also a common phenomenon among people who are in relationships with narcissists. This is because the narcissist has such unreachable standards in any relationship that the “supply” is treated as an extension of the narcissist’s self, when it’s convenient – and as nothing, when it’s not.

When two people have a very close relationship, it’s natural and mentally healthy to depend on each other for certain things. However, if one of you loses sight of who you are, in order to please only the other person, the relationship can become very unhealthy. One of the most troubling relationship elements is codependency.