4 Positive Ways Narcissistic Abuse Survivors Can Improve Self-Worth

4 Positive Ways Narcissistic Abuse Survivors Can Improve Self-Worth

Going through the hell that is narcissistic abuse does a real number to your ability to see your own self-worth. And while “self-worth” might not seem like a very important thing in theory, it can affect literally every single aspect of your life – and this does include your physical health, not to mention your mental health and ability to succeed in life.

Here’s a difficult truth: If you’re finding yourself feeling STUCK, or suffering from a lack of motivation, or feelings of depression or stagnation in your life, it could be due to a lack of self-worth.

“Self-worth” is a phrase we see thrown around a lot, and for survivors of narcissistic abuse, it can certainly be awkward to address.

What IS self-worth, anyway?

Think of it as a step above self-respect. Having self-respect means that you understand that you are valuable as a person, while self-worth means that you feel valuable among people – that you feel that you bring something special to the table; that you are valuable.

Maybe you feel a low sense of self-worth because you may feel like you haven’t learned or accomplished as much as those around you. Or, maybe you’ve just entered a new space in which you feel less qualified than those around you, or you recently tried something that didn’t work out and it damaged your sense of self-worth. Whatever your situation is, there’s nothing wrong with the feeling that you need to earn a sense of self-worth provided that you know where to start.

Or, like many narcissistic abuse survivors, perhaps you are or were in a toxic relationship with an abusive narcissist who destroyed your self-image and your self-worth. Maybe you don’t even know who you are anymore.

So what are you supposed to do? How do you rediscover (or discover for the first time) your self-worth? How can you recognize your value as a person?

First: Change Your Perspective

Your perspective is the way you see things, and the first and most important thing you can do to improve your self worth is to change your perspective.
Interesting fact: after being emotionally and mentally abused, we tend to become people-pleasers. This leads us to attempt to improve our self-worth by trying to prove ourselves to other people.

This almost never works, at least not for long. Validation from outside ourselves is fleeting and dependent on other people. We have to learn to self-validate – this is the only way to truly own our sense of self and self-worth.

Start by looking at how far you’ve come in your journey rather than comparing yourself to other people. And remember: everyone is different, and none of us was born with all of the knowledge, experience, and skills that make us valuable. Other people aren’t better than you because they got there first.

Learn Something New or Start a Project

I always find that a good project can be just what I need to get out of a slump. Maybe the project IS learning something new, or maybe it’s a creative venture. Either way, there’s a certain sense of accomplishment in creating, and in knowing that you know something. It gives you something to focus on, something to talk about and think about – something positive instead of negative. Learning something new that you are passionate about can help you to “grow forward” in some pretty significant ways. Join a club devoted to your passion, or just try to find some time on your own to do some reading and then find people that you can share your interest with. It’s a beautiful thing, my friend.

Not sue what you’re passionate about? No worries! Grab your free passion planner, right here. 

Try Volunteering

Maybe you can use your new-found skill as a volunteer. Not only could it help to improve your opinion of yourself, but it can also be the perfect outlet for your creative energy. Plus: volunteering is great for self-worth for a couple of reasons.

  • Sense of accomplishment and purpose – By volunteering, no matter what you do, you are giving your time and energy in order to help those who are less fortunate than you. Maybe you didn’t graduate at the top of your class or that last project at work didn’t go the way that you hoped, but every volunteer should feel that they are doing meaningful work and that their efforts are appreciated.
  • Using your talents in a supportive and unique environment – Learning new skills or learning how to use your skills in new ways can both be great ways to discover or increase your potential in an environment that is likely to be more supportive and less judgmental than a school or work environment.

Take Care of Yourself

Self-care is SO important in understanding our self-worth. It might seem obvious, but taking even a few minutes a day to just take care of YOU can change your whole world – and it can most definitely build self-worth.

Mindfulness Meditation for Gratitude

Mindfulness Meditation for Gratitude

6 minutes of self-care ! I hope you enjoy this short meditation.

Thank you to Paul Weinfield for talking to me today and for his guided mindfuness meditation. Paul’s book, “The Magpie Art: Gathering the Brightness of Every Day” can be found at Amazon or many other retail locations online, or check your local bookstore. It is a really wonderful book with so much insight and beauty, I highly recommend it.

Thank you to Hillary Younger for the amazing image used during the meditation. Check out her work if you have not already!!

For information about Lise Colucci and how to schedule and appointment for coaching, group coaching you can find her here.

Self-Care Group Coaching Begins Next Week

Self-Care Group Coaching Begins Next Week

             Self Care Group Coaching

Sign up at Life Makeover Academy

Self-care is needed for recover for most of us and this coaching group is focused just on that !! Join Lise for 5 weeks of group coaching to help you learn or strengthen your self-care.  

If you want to join but can’t do the holiday weeks ( Christmas and NYE) let Lise know by email and she will bill you for weeks attending instead of all 5. 

  • Group will meet on video chat Tuesday’s 9am or 6pm pacific beginning December 18.
  • Cost is 75.00 for 5 weeks ( 15 per week, non refundable due to discounted cost)
  • There is also an active messenger chat on Facebook with daily coach check in and extra help.

For information about Lise you can find her here on QueenBeeing. 

Group Coaching Starting Next Week

Group Coaching Starting Next Week

Two group coaching opportunities starting next week.

Group Coaching for Adult Children of Narcissists 

sign up at Life Makeover Academy

Healing from childhood wounds can be almost like starting over and take time to discover who you truly are. Many healing issues that arise from being raised by a narcissistic parent are greatly benefitted through coaching. The support and compassion within a group can lead you towards a deeper healing as well. Join Colleen once a week for an hour of group coaching where you meet privately, face to face in video to talk about and get some coaching help for the issues around healing from a toxic parent.

Details:

  • Weekly meetings on Wednesdays at 6pm Central beginning December 5th
  • Cost is $60.00 for 4 weeks of coaching ( non-refundable due to the discounted rate)

 

 

Group Coaching Inner Transformation 

sign up at Life Makeover Academy 

This group will focus on topics such as helping to identify and heal codependent traits, finding ways to support and heal your inner child and learning to apply reframing limiting beliefs to create positive self-affriming new beliefs. Join coach Lise for weekly video meetings.

Details:

  • One hour weekly video meetings on Wedsnesday 6pm or Friday 11 am Pacific beginning December 5th
  • Cost: $60 (non refundable at this reduced group rate) for all 4 weeks .

 

 

 

 

 

Mindfulness: What is it? Plus How it Can Help After Trauma and a Short Meditation

Mindfulness: What is it? Plus How it Can Help After Trauma and a Short Meditation

What is mindfulness and how can it help you as a survivor of abuse? There is a short 5 minute meditation at the end so stay tuned ! Thank you to Paul Weinfield for talking to me today and for his guided mindfuness meditation. Paul’s book, “The Magpie Art: Gathering the Brightness of Every Day” can be found at Amazon or many other retail locations online, or check your local bookstore. It is a really wonderful book with so much insight and beauty, I highly recommend it.

Thank you to Hillary Younger for the amazing image used during the meditation. Check out her work if you have not already!!

For information about Lise Colucci and how to schedhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tCucy… coaching, group coaching or to call in as a survivor on a future you can find her here http://queenbeeing.com/lise/

Self-Esteem Focus Group Coaching

Self-Esteem Focus Group Coaching


Part of the Personal Power Group Coaching series, Self-Esteem Group Coaching begins next week. 

For information or to join head over to Life Makeover Academy and sign up.

The name says it all, we will spend 4 weeks focusing on building self-esteem which can be so challenging after narcissistic abuse. Do you need some help to discover, rediscover or boost your self-esteem? Join other survivors and get some coaching help from Lise while you awaken your personal power.

Details:

  • One hour weekly video meetings on Monday or Friday at 6pm Pacific
  • Sessions begin November 19th
  • Cost: $60 (non refundable at this reduced group rate) for all 4 weeks
  • This also includes a private messenger chat group to help keep connection and continuity through the week as well as get daily coaching check-ins from Lise.

You will be contacted by Lise once you sign up about the time you choose to meet as well as to be added to the messenger chat.

You can email Lise directly at CoachLIseC@gmail.com.

For information about Lise or to sign up for personal one on one coaching  you can follow the link here.

 

 

 

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