Protect Yourself From a Stalker

Important: What to Do If You’re In Immediate Danger

Source: VictimsofCrime.org

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  • If you are in immediate danger, do not hesitate to call 911 (or the emergency number in your country, if not in the US).
  • Trust yourself and your instincts. Don’t downplay the danger Too often we have a high threshold for abuse and abuse amnesia. If you feel you are unsafe, you probably are.
  • Take threats seriously. Danger generally is higher when the stalker talks about suicide or murder, or when a victim tries to leave or end the relationship.
Police Security & Evidence
  • Keep evidence of the stalking. When the stalker follows you or contacts you, write down the time, date, and place. Keep emails, text messages, phone messages, letters, or notes. Photograph anything of yours the stalker damages and any injuries the stalker causes. Ask witnesses to write down what they saw.
  • Contact the police. Every state has stalking laws. The stalker may also have broken other laws by doing things like assaulting you or stealing or destroying your property.
  • Consider getting a court order that tells the stalker to stay away from you.
  • Tell family, friends, roommates, and co-workers about the stalking and seek their support.
  • Tell the security staff at your job or school. Ask them to help watch out for your safety.
Communication
  • Contact a crisis hotline, victim services agency, or a domestic violence or rape crisis program. They can help you devise a safety plan, give you information about local laws, weigh options such as seeking a protection order, and refer you to other services.
  • Develop a safety plan, including things like changing your routine, arranging a place to stay, and having a friend or relative go places with you. Also, decide in advance what to do if the stalker shows up at your home, work, school, or somewhere else. Tell people how they can help you. Click here to learn more about safety plans.
  • Don’t communicate with the stalker or respond to attempts to contact you.

New Resources for Victims of Stalking Narcissists

Dear SPANily, Due to what I see as a serious issue, I've created a new set of resources for you. As you may or may not be aware, many toxic relationships end in stalking. In fact, many survivors of narcissistic abuse are stalked during the relationship and after as...

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