Your Ex Narcissist’s New Supply: Is there an ethical obligation to warn new supply of toxic abuse?
Today, I’m answering a question from a viewer who believes that we have an ethical obligation to warn the narcissist’s new source of narcissistic supply that he or she may be abused. Here’s the comment:
jeffry michineau commented:
“I think the view that we should just sit by and watch the new victim be torn to shreds is like supplying the narc. we only say this from the point of view of being former victims… you see it was we who allowed and fueled these creatures.. then sheepishly cow under all of their next bombing campaigns.. psychological bloodshed and the havoc they are creating in our social family circles,, why because of the after effects of our own victimhood.. we forget about our humanitarian… technical or even our highly acclaimed communication skills… and just give in to these midget brained quasi emotional rapist and toxin squirting manipulators.. that are on the hollywood elite actors list of most evil creatures… I think we could with our own artfulness say or do something just respond to them with well thought out defenses otherwise we would be just a bunch of losers licking our wounds and succumbing to the machinations of the Devil’s children…otherwise called Narcissists”
Every day, I learn something new, something that makes my life just a little bit better. I have learned how to use intentional thoughts and to choose my perception in order to bring about positive changes in my life, almost without fail. It really is “all in your head” and that is just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to what i like to call “toxic relationship rehab.”
While I’ve been writing about this topic since 2006, including several books on and around it, I only started posting on YouTube in 2016. (I did have a few random videos before that were unrelated, though.) I’ve been learning something new literally every day about how to better serve my audience, and that is in part thanks to the amazing community of YouTubers who actively share their knowledge on how to be most effective on the platform.
YouTube has literally changed my life and transformed my business already! I tell everyone I know they should try it.
Since my channel became a channel in 2016, I’ve been able to drop all of my “side hustles” and focus on my passion: helping people make their lives better by first helping them to identify a narcissists and their toxic abuse (which is hard to detect but incredibly dehumanizing – so many people are SHOCKED when they realize what’s happening).
Plus, i’ll tell you how to deal with a narcissistic addict and how to tell if someone is both a narcissist AND and addict, or just an addict. I’ll also discuss how to get a narcissist in rehab and what to say to a narcissist to get one to go to rehab.
Plus, I’ll tell you what to do if you can’t get the NPD addict to try rehab or recovery to start their own healing from their “drug of choice.”
7 Easy Tricks to Calm Your Mind Without Meditation
Meditation is a powerful tool, but it’s not the only way to calm your mind. Consider these tricks to find peace and inner calmness.
Try these ideas the next time you want to calm your mind and feel better:
1. Breathe. The simple act of breathing can help you calm down quickly and reduce anxiety. Breathing can help you focus on the moment and forget your worries. A few deep breaths help relax your muscles as your cells receive the extra oxygen.
○ Learn simple breathing exercises or just breathe deeply.
2. Show gratitude. By showing gratitude, you can change your focus and find peace. Being thankful and saying it can help you see the positive things that are around you.
○ Send an email, talk on the phone, or write a note to someone that you would like to thank.
○ When stopping and giving thanks, you’re also living in the present moment. When your mind is on the present moment, there’s no room for worrying about the future or regretting your past.
3. Smile. How often do you smile during the day? Do you smile at strangers as well as friends?
○ Smiling can instantly boost your mood. It can help relax the body and mind, help the immune system, and reduce stress.
○ Research published in the journal Psychological Science shows that even a fake smile can have a positive effect on the body. The act of smiling positively affects the brain.
4. Go for a hike or enjoy nature. If meditation doesn’t appeal to you because it involves sitting, then go for a hike or find another way to enjoy nature. Explore a park, trail, or other natural area near you.
○ Notice the sounds, smells, and visuals in front of you as you walk.
○ Nature can have a soothing impact on the brain and body.
5. Turn off your phone and other devices. Constant communication and connection can make it hard to have a calm mind. Turn off your phones, tablets, computers and other devices to find peace.
○ By disconnecting from technology for brief periods of time, you’ll be able to relax.
6. Play with your pet. If you’re lucky to have a dog, cat, or other animal, play with them to find calmness. Research shows that pets can help people stay calm and relax.
○ Try petting your dog or cat for an extended period of time. Only focus on them and don’t think about other issues.
○ Consider taking your pet for a walk and getting exercise at the same time.
7. Do some type of manual labor. Sometimes, manual labor such as cleaning the house or mowing the lawn can help calm the mind. Exercise can boost brain chemicals that make you happy.
○ Manual labor can help you forget issues by forcing you to focus on completing the tasks.
○ Look for activities that need to be done at home or at work. Do the dishes, vacuum, clean out closets, or organize cabinets. Sort the garage or attic, try gardening, or pull weeds. If you’re finished with tasks at home, reach out to friends and neighbors to help them.
Although meditation can be important, it’s not the only way to stay calm. Consider trying other methods and experimenting until you find the ones that work best for you.
The closest person to me is me. I know my strengths and uncertainties. When I talk to myself, I use words that uplift me and build my strength.
I relish in telling myself that I am a winner. It gives me a dose of encouragement for those situations where I am unsure of my ability to conquer.
Going for job interviews is intimidating, but when I remind myself that I am good enough, I lose all inhibitions and am able to sell myself as the ideal candidate. I avoid feeling inadequate. I dig deep into my soul and identify the things of true beauty there.
I am a symbol of inner beauty. Showing myself as an honest and caring person is enough to prove my worth. I close the door on anyone who overlooks those traits in search of outer beauty.
When I tell myself something positive for long enough, I end up believing it. Although I sometimes lack the proof of my ability, I move forward in faith. I know that I am able to develop whatever skills I desire.
Today, my self-talk is uplifting and empowering. My emphasis each day is to strengthen my spirit so that I remain willing to take on challenges. Anything in life is attainable when I believe in myself.
1. What do I tell myself when I am feeling discouraged?
2. How effective are meditation and deep breathing when I feel nervous?
3. When do I most need courage?
Narcissists are known for their manipulative ways, and one way they really get you under control is by grooming you to desensitize you to their abuse. They do this by TELLING you who you are and what you think – and with underhanded “compliments” that are really more like directions or orders.
In this video, I’ll fill you in on how they desensitize you during grooming and how they sort of brainwash you into behaving how they want you to during the relationship.
This is why they always expect you to put their needs first – and why eventually , you actually DO it.