Chances are you believe in others more than you believe in yourself. You’re probably the first to encourage a friend to keep going because they have what it takes. But when it comes to encouraging yourself, it’s easy to shy away due to self-doubt.
It’s not fair to cheat yourself out of opportunities. Having low self-confidence can cause you to lose out on awesome experiences. And you certainly don’t want that, do you?
Now is a great time to start focusing on yourself and work on boosting your confidence. And it’s surprisingly easy to do.
Follow these steps to boost your confidence and start believing in yourself:
Avoid hesitation. Self-doubt is often developed out of hesitation. Do you take a long time to act on an impulse? If you see an opportunity, does it take you a while to go after it? The longer you take to pursue something, the more reasons you’ll find for justifying your unsuitability for the opportunity.
- Avoid “sleeping on it” if you can decide right away. For a self-doubter, delaying a response usually means losing the confidence to go after the opportunity.
- Do you think you’re not ideal for a new role you’ve been offered at work? Forget about that for a minute. Focus on the fact that you were actually offered the job for a reason!
Challenge negative thinking. It’s easy to diminish self-confidence by harboring negative thoughts. But before you accept negative thoughts about yourself as a reality, challenge the thinking.
- Instead of accepting you’re not good enough, take a moment to think about the facts. Have there been instances which support your negative thinking? If the answer is yes, then remind yourself of your many positive experiences as well.
- Beware of thought patterns that can eat away at your self-esteem. Avoid looking at life as “black or white” and live in the grey area sometimes. You may not have one trait or another, but you could have the perfect combination of what you need for your life!
- Always be sure to differentiate between feelings and facts. Just because something makes you feel a particular way doesn’t mean there’s any fact in it.
Be kind to yourself. As someone who rarely displays self-confidence, you probably give yourself a hard time and consider yourself inadequate or ill-equipped. But when was the last time you were actually kind to yourself?
- Spend some time each day highlighting your positive traits. Remind yourself what makes you beautiful inside and out.
Celebrate the small successes to help remind yourself that you’re actually more amazing than you give yourself credit for.
- Try spending some time with positive people. Their energy rubs off quite easily!
Learn to listen to and accept compliments. Most of the time when people say nice things about you, they mean it! Take the time to really hear what positive things are being said about you. Absorb the thought and believe them!
- If someone says you’re beautiful, believe them!
- Spend some time listening to the kind things said by others. And remember to say thanks each time. It helps to cement the positive thoughts in your mind.
During the next 30 days, be patient with yourself. Consider each of these tips on a daily basis. Gradually, as with anything else, practicing self-confidence becomes second nature.
In no time, you’ll see the world is in the palm of your hand. And you’ll hear every opportunity calling your name. Aren’t you excited for that time? Start building your confidence now and soon it will be yours forever!
Angela Atkinson is a Certified Life Coach and the author of more than 20 books on narcissism, narcissistic abuse recovery and related topics. A recognized expert on narcissism and narcissistic personality disorder who has studied and written extensively on narcissistic relationships since 2006, Atkinson was inspired to begin her work as a result of having survived toxic relationships of her own.
Atkinson offers trauma-informed coaching and has certifications in life coaching, level 2 therapeutic model, CBT coaching, integrative wellness coaching, and NLP. She is a certified trauma support coach and certified family trauma professional. She also has a professional PTSD counseling certification. Her mission is to help those who have experienced the emotional and mental devastation that comes with narcissistic abuse in these incredibly toxic relationships to (re)discover their true selves, stop the gaslighting and manipulation and move forward into their genuine desires – into a life that is exactly what they choose for themselves.
Along with her solution-focused life coaching experience, Atkinson’s previous career in journalism and research helps her to offer both accurate and understandable information for survivors of abuse in a simple-to-understand way that helps to increase awareness in the narcissistic abuse recovery community. Atkinson founded QueenBeeing.com Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Support, the SPANily Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Support Groups and the Life Makeover Academy. In her life coaching practice, Atkinson’s clients enjoy her personalized approach that allows and encourages them to become the best possible versions of themselves and to succeed in doing what they love most. She offers individual and group coaching for victims and survivors of narcissistic abuse at NarcissisticAbuseRecovery.Online and NarcissismSupportCoach.com.