Calming Scents That Mellow You Out: Healing After Narcissistic Abuse

Written by ProjectBlissful

Scents can be a very powerful thing. I’m sure you’ve noticed this yourself. Smelling a particular scent like fresh baked chocolate chip cookie brings back a childhood memory. The scent of coffee in the morning helps you crawl out of bed and wake up. Other scents, like that of a burning fire, may make you feel fearful or afraid. Scents can warn us of danger, help us relax, and certain scents have even been shown to help increase our memory. As I said, scents are a powerful tool and they can actually help us in our healing from narcissistic abuse when we use them intentionally.

So, hey, why not use aromatherapy to help us mellow out and reduce anxiety when needed, right?

Let’s look at some calming scents that mellow you out. You can use essential oils and a diffuser, find a scented candle, make some potpourri, or use the fresh or dried ingredients around the house. The most important thing is to find a way to incorporate the scents that you find particularly helpful in your life.

Here are some of my favorites, and their benefits:

  • Lavender – The fragrance of lavender replaces fast brain activity with a slower alpha wave to help reduce anxiety.
  • Chamomile – Chamomile helps reduce stress and can also help with insomnia & tense muscles.
  • Rose Geranium – Along with helping with relaxation by soothing the entire central nervous system it can also help balance hormonal levels.
  • Jasmine – A great fragrance for anti-anxiety. By increasing the GABA activity within the brain, jasmine can help to regulate feelings of stress and anxiety.
  • Bergamot – This citrus scent helps to restore the hypothalamus to a state of homeostasis and calmness
  • Sandalwood – Sandalwood has been used to help reduce overall anxiety in terminally ill patients. It has also been noted to help improve quality of sleep.

In addition to these particular scents, look for essential oil blends and scented candles that mention relaxation or calm. They may include one or more of the scents mentioned above in a mix that’s specifically designed to help you relax.

Here’s a collaboration video I did awhile back with Kim Saeed on the benefits of essential oils in narcissistic abuse recovery.


  • Regardless of your age, sex, race, weight, nationality or financial situation, you can begin to affect change throughout your whole life by taking some very simple steps. A hint? It all starts in your head–and your heart. Project Blissful is a movement toward whole-life healing, growth and improvement. It’s more than a movement–it’s a real whole-life project that anyone can join and participate in at anytime.

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