8 Distinctive Tricks to Immediately Change Your Emotional State

8 Distinctive Tricks to Immediately Change Your Emotional State

When you’re a survivor of narcissistic abuse, you may have trouble managing your emotional state, especially if you’re deep in the throes of grief and anxiety as you transition to life without the narcissist. Issues connected to C-PTSD and other after-effects of the trauma you’ve just experienced will run rampant in your mind and body until you find a way to heal. 

In the meantime, there are so many things you can do to help yourself feel better right now. For example, you could use a pattern interrupt to shift from feeling weak and worthless to feeling empowered and worthy. 

What is a pattern interrupt?

A pattern interrupt is a way to stop one of your habitual reactions. This can be helpful because you can stop yourself from reacting in an unhealthy way and choose a better response. It can also be used to help your brain notice small things that you might otherwise overlook.

This concept is commonly used in NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming), as well as other self-help practices, to help people change their habits, thoughts, and emotions. In other words, pattern interrupts are deliberate actions that break undesirable habits.

You can use pattern interrupts to redirect the flow of a conversation when it’s going too far off-track, or when you’re ready to move on to talking about something else. They’re also useful for breaking up long monologues by other people.

Most importantly, pattern interrupts can help you get through the difficult moments in your relationships, including the one you might have or have had with the narcissist. This way, you can truly begin to heal yourself and take back your life – one baby step at a time.

How does a pattern interrupt help? 

Pattern interrupts are highly effective for so many different aspects of narcissistic abuse recovery, and this is one more way they can be used. During and after a toxic relationship, your grief, anxiety, and depression can become automatic behaviors – patterns – that you fall into without thought.

So, when you begin to work on letting go of the narcissist and the toxic relationship, you can use mindfulness to pay attention to your thoughts and ideas, and then you can choose to use a pattern-interrupt to change it. 

Try These Simple Pattern Interrupt Ideas

Pattern interrupts are part of NLP (Neurolinguistic programming). Sounds complicated, right? But it’s so simple. Here are some quick and easy-to-implement pattern interrupt ideas for you.

  • Try a simple affirmation you repeat to yourself in the moment.
  • Try standing up and moving into a different room of the house.
  • Try taking a quick shower.
  • You can brush your teeth or hair or wash your hands.
  • Try to count all of the items in a room that are a certain color.

There are so many other options to interrupt these toxic patterns in your own mind. Here’s a quick video where I explain pattern interrupts in more detail.

Pattern Interrupts to Change Your Emotional State Quickly

If you need to change your mood or emotional state in a hurry, you have options available to you. Your emotional state affects your attitude, focus, decisions, and your ability to act.

The ability to manage your emotional state is a powerful skill that must be mastered if you want to be able to get the most out of each day. If you can control your emotional state, you can be happier and more successful.

Surprisingly Effective Pattern Interrupt Strategies for Emotional Control 

1. Move.

Your emotions are actually body feelings created by your thoughts. If you move your body, the way your body feels will change. Moving is one of the most effective ways to change your emotional state. There are many ways to use your body to alter your emotions. Here are just a few options:

● Stand straighter.
● Do jumping jacks.
● Dance.
● Stand up quickly.
● Spin around.
● Walk like a robot.
● Run.
● Skip.

2. Laugh.

Laughing feels really good! Make yourself laugh and you’ll feel differently, and the change is instantaneous.

● Think about something funny.
● Watch your favorite comedian.
● Talk with your funniest friend.
● Read a joke.

3. Give yourself a change of scenery.

It’s amazing how much difference you can feel if you just move to a new location.

● Spend an hour at the coffee shop.
● Go to the library.
● Walk around the park.
● Sit out on your back patio.

4. Do something that frightens you.

If you want to take your mind off your current thoughts, fear is an effective way to do it. Your emotional state will change, guaranteed.

● Strike up a conversation with an attractive stranger.
● Have that conversation you’ve been avoiding.
● Go to the pet shop and ask to hold that scary-looking snake.

5. Drink a large glass of cold water.

A good drink of water can change how you feel. Making sure that it’s cold makes the experience jolting. Pour yourself a tall, cold glass of water, stand outside, and drink it.

6. Use heat or cold.

Anything that impacts your body significantly can impact your emotional state, too. Heat and cold are all-encompassing experiences for your body. Your attention can’t help but notice them. Your brain and body are also taking notice. Your blood vessels expand or contract. You sweat more or less. There’s a lot going on when you expose yourself to significant temperatures.

● Sit outside on a hot or cold day.
● Take a hot shower or bath. Sit in a hot tub or sauna.
● Try a cold shower or bath (this is known to help tone your vagus nerve – which is shockingly effective in helping to heal your trauma).

7. Sing or hum.

Singing is a novel way to change how you feel. If you’re not used to singing, it can feel awkward. If you sing regularly, you do so because it’s enjoyable. Either way, your emotional state will be impacted. (Also good for the vagus nerve!)

8. Do something new or unexpected.

Shock your system by doing something totally out of character.

● Pull out the bike you haven’t ridden in years and go for a ride.
● Take a walk around the neighborhood if you rarely do so.
● Go out to a new restaurant.
● Call an old friend you haven’t spoken to in ages.
● Eat a tablespoon of hot sauce.
● Shake things up.

You have an emotional state of some sort every waking moment of the day. The real question is whether or not it’s a useful emotional state. Even more importantly, is it the optimal emotional state for the current moment? You can change your emotional state with practice. You can even change it quickly!

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3 Limiting Beliefs That Hold You Back in Narcissistic Abuse Recovery

3 Limiting Beliefs That Hold You Back in Narcissistic Abuse Recovery

When I first started my healing journey through narcissistic abuse recovery, I didn’t even know what a limiting belief was. Yet, I still found myself victim to some of these negative thoughts and feelings.

How do you figure out which limiting beliefs you’re holding on to?

It’s definitely a process to suss out your own limiting beliefs, but it’s a worthy one. For me, it took looking back at my childhood traumas and the beliefs I learned growing up before I discovered that they were holding me back. This is when it finally clicked for me; how could I ever live the life I wanted if those very thoughts and feelings were preventing it from coming to fruition? It was time to let go. Can you relate?

What are the limiting beliefs holding you back from narcissistic abuse recovery?

There are several limiting beliefs that can hold you back in your recovery from narcissistic abuse. You may have developed these due to childhood trauma and/or the trauma the narcissist inflicted on you. Regardless of how you came to believe these things about yourself, they will prevent you from healing and getting over your ex. It is time to let go of what’s holding you back so you can move forward and create a healthy future for yourself!

Why do we feel so powerless after narcissistic abuse?

One of the biggest struggles for survivors of narcissistic abuse is learning that they need to start putting themselves first or consider themselves a top priority. This seems easier than it might actually be, especially for those of us who have been through the hell of being connected to a toxic person. In addition to our own perceptions about what we SHOULD be, we have society telling us that we’re supposed to always put other people before ourselves.

Think about it: how many times did your mom tell you not to be selfish? How much social pressure is there for you to be selfless?

3 Limiting Beliefs You Need to Let Go Of Today

If you’ve been in a toxic relationship, you know how hard it can be to put yourself first. If you’re having trouble prioritizing yourself without guilt, there might be something holding you back. Now is the time to let go of those limiting beliefs and take control of your own life.

1. If I set boundaries, no one will like me!

You’re allowed (and, in my opinion, you have a responsibility) to set boundaries. But narcissists have this way of pushing your boundaries and eventually eliminating them, so you might be a little out of practice. The first thing I want to do is reassure you – if you start to take care of yourself, your friends and family will like you even better. They’ll be relieved to finally see you getting your needs met.

The unfortunate thing is that the people who might push away from you might also be toxic. But for those who are your real friends and who really care, you’ll find something very different happens. If you’re polite but firm, they’ll accept that you can’t run yourself ragged doing what everyone else wants all the time. They might even respect you more for your honesty!

2. Everyone counts on me to be the strong one!

You know that friend who is constantly inviting themselves to dinner at your house? The one who always seems to have the neediest, most dramatic problems ever? Who thinks that “caring” means you should spend time listening to their never-ending parade of complaints about how hard their life is? Are you falling into the role of the victim/rescuer? You’re having a tough time and no one hears you. Do they even care or are they just used to hearing your sad stories?

Having been scapegoated and played, the eternal caregiver is a self-inflicted victim role that narcissists make their victims adopt by exploiting their vulnerabilities. In a way, they are emotionally manipulating us into sacrificing ourselves on the altar of their false emotional needs, which are as hollow as their pathological ego. It’s time to step out of our people-pleaser roles and reclaim our true identities, to become more authentic and whole.

You might be wondering why you feel the need to take care of everyone and everything. And if you don’t start taking care of yourself, might you become someone who gets burnt out and resentful? After all, it can be exhausting to have other people always relying on you. So take some time to get some rest. You deserve it after all!

Cut yourself and everyone else some slack and let other people help too. As a bonus, if you make sure your own needs are satisfied, you’ll be in a much better position to give.

3. But, it’s not right to put me first!

It may seem counterintuitive, but putting yourself first is actually good advice. It is not selfish to start caring for your physical and emotional health. When you don’t put yourself first, you’re telling your unconscious mind that other people are more important than you. And listen – believing you can’t achieve anything, and you don’t deserve to succeed is a recipe for staying stuck.

Why do you need to leave these limiting beliefs behind you?

Are you drained of energy by putting other’s needs before yours? Or perhaps you’ve given up on believing your needs and desires will ever come first? These three core beliefs need to be challenged and overcome if you’re going to develop a healthier attitude to putting yourself first. Like changing any habit, you need to practice and take baby steps first.

Have a look at your own needs and desires, and practice saying yes to what your body, mind, and heart need.

Are you having trouble keeping yourself from falling back into your toxic relationship?

You might be interested in this discussion we had during a live stream today in which we discussed letting go of your feelings for the toxic person in your life and steps you can take to ease the pain.

If you need additional help and support in your narcissistic abuse recovery, look for a trauma-informed professional trained in helping people who are dealing with overcoming narcissistic abuse in toxic relationships. Depending on your particular situation, you might benefit from Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Coaching, or you might do better with a therapist. But, first, you have to decide what to do from here – if you’re unsure, start with my free Narcissistic Abuse Recovery quiz. With your results will come recommended resources for your situation.

Start Getting Help with Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Today

If you haven’t already picked it up, head over and download your free PLANning Tool Kit (Planning to Leave a Narcissist). Then, when you’re safe and ready to move forward, remember that online help is readily available for survivors of narcissistic abuse. Here are some options to begin healing from narcissistic abuse right away.

Recent FAQ on Narcissistic Abuse Recovery at QueenBeeing

Recent FAQ on Narcissistic Abuse Recovery at QueenBeeing

After a recent poll of my email subscribers, I noticed a few commonly asked questions and thought I’d share the answers with you as well. (Though, if you are one of my email insiders who completed the survey, you may have already seen this. If you aren’t, you can claim your spot on the inside right here). I’ll even give you some helpful free stuff when you do.

If you don’t see the answer to your most pressing questions below, please check out my FAQ pages as well – I’ve got a surprising amount of information covered there, too.

Without further delay, here are the answers to the 9 most recent frequently asked questions about QueenBeeing Narcissistic Abuse Recovery.

Q. Can you start publishing the transcripts with your videos?

A. I recently started doing exactly that. Check out my Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Blog and let me know your thoughts!

Q. Can I email you my questions and expect to receive an answer?

A. If I’m being honest, I get hundreds of emails every day. There is just no way I can possibly answer all of the questions that come my way, especially when sometimes people send me lengthy stories that I need to read to understand what they are going through. I DO try to answer as many emails and messages as I can, but it’s really hard for me, and I don’t currently have anyone who can help me with certain types of questions. This leads me to three suggestions for you:

  • First, if you keep your question to one paragraph or less (say, no more than 350 words), I am far more likely to catch and respond to your question.
  • Second, if your question is about something like an appointment, a group, a class/course or where to find something, you can always email my team at [email protected] If they don’t know the answer, they’ll know where to find it.
  • One last tip: use your search bar in Google and/or YouTube and type your question along with my name (for example, you might type something like, “angie atkinson what is gaslighting?” to be directed to both my YouTube videos and/or my QueenBeeing blog posts on this topic. I have done a LOT of work in this field and a lot of people are surprised that this simple tip will often get them the answers they have been seeking. (It could save you time, anyway!)

Q. Why did you name your website “QueenBeeing” anyway? Isn’t that kind of narcissistic?

A. Well, it all started with my own need to feel powerful. (Click here to read my story) This made-up word “QueenBeeing” felt powerful to me. There is a lot of symbolism in it for me (read about that here). In fact, you might say it’s a whole art form – or at least a lifestyle. You can read about the Art of QueenBeeing here and see if it feels like a fit for you. Once you’ve read my reasons, I don’t think you’ll feel like it’s so narcissistic after all. It’s more about reclaiming personal power than anything else.

Q. I wish there were other ways to be part of the community. I am not on Facebook or any other social media, but I would like to be part of a group like you have on Facebook. Am I right that I would have to pay to subscribe to be part of a non Facebook group? I am not sure what my options are.

A. I totally understand. You’re right that the free groups are primarily Facebook based and I know that doesn’t work for everyone. However, I do have an off-Facebook option at MySpanily.com that is available. It does cost $3.99 per month as it costs me money to keep it up and running. However, if you are in a position where you cannot afford $3.99 per month and you really need the off-Facebook support, please let us know – I’ll gift you a membership. I want to support everyone I can and this is one place I am able to bend a little, and I do when someone needs the help.

Please Note: if you want to help cover the costs of memberships for people who can’t afford them, you can submit donations to my PayPal account under [email protected]. You’ll see my business name, BlissFireMedia, LLC – don’t worry, that’s me.

Q. I would like to see real survivors giving video testimonials about their abuse and life with their narcissists, how they managed to leave and start over, how things went for them and what steps they had to take to get to where they are now, and what their life has been like, since; ways it’s improved and ways in which it has deteriorated. Maybe a once weekly slot that a survivor volunteers to fill and allows to show on your site​.

A. This is an excellent idea! The only issue is that a lot of survivors don’t want to put their faces on camera. However, I would be thrilled to work with anyone who would be willing to share their stories on camera. If you’re one of those people, let us know and we’ll send you instructions on what to do. And don’t forget that we do have a whole section of survivor stories on QueenBeeing.com. I would LOVE to help you share your story too! You can learn more and submit your own written story here, if you’re interested. It may take a couple of weeks to get published, but we do our best to say on top of entries.​

Q. Perhaps you have it already, but I’m looking a place to reach out for counseling. I am seeking one on one.

A. I do offer one-on-one narcissistic abuse recovery coaching, as do my fellow coaches. You can learn more and schedule an appointment by clicking right here. We also offer group coaching and many free support groups, if you’re interested. Learn more about that right here.

Q Could you offer more courses on Udemy?  Could you offer more learning courses anywhere online?​ 

A. I’ll consider adding more courses to my Udemy selection (I just noticed the two I have there are currently part of a huge sale Udemy is having!), but in the meantime, you might want to visit Life Makeover Academy – I have TONS of free and paid courses there for you. If you have a course topic you don’t see over at LMA that you’d like me to create, please let me know! Like I said, I want to do whatever I can to serve you.

Q. Is there a way to find content for me personally, for just the stage of recovery I’m in right now? 

A. Yes, I have a little quiz you can take to figure out where you are in the recovery process (click here to try it) and your results will direct you to some resources specifically for you. If you already know which recovery phase you are in, you can click here to find the resources you need. I’ll keep working on making this easier for you to find and always appreciate your ideas and thoughts on this stuff – please let me know if you have any thoughts on how I can make everything easier to find for you.

Quarantined with a Narcissist? Quick & Dirty Tips to Help You Survive With Less Stress

Quarantined with a Narcissist? Quick & Dirty Tips to Help You Survive With Less Stress

Stuck at Home with a Narcissist During the CoVID19 Quarantine? Here’s How to Deal and What to Expect

Are you stuck at home with a narcissist during this difficult time? If you are, then you’ll need tips on how to deal and what to expect. This video offers you the honest truth about what you can expect as well as tips and ideas on how to deal with the narcissist’s manipulation and gaslighting in the moment, and more.

Pink Clouding in Narcissistic Abuse Recovery

Pink Clouding in Narcissistic Abuse Recovery

There’s one phenomenon that early in narcissistic abuse recovery puts us at risk, and if we fall for it, we will end up “relapsing” and find ourselves falling for hoovering from the narcissist – or worse, chasing after them.

It’s called “the pink cloud.”

Have you ever heard of “the pink cloud” part of narcissistic abuse recovery?

If not, buckle up – I’m about to explain exactly what it is and how complicated it can be.

Pink Cloud Syndrome in Narcissistic Abuse Recovery

Pink clouding absolutely is real – for addicts of all types, including narcissistic abuse survivors who might be dealing with trauma bonding, but it isn’t something that can be seen with the human eye (at least not yet).

We’ve talked before about how the trauma bonds we develop with narcissists affect the same part of the brain as any other addiction.

What is trauma bonding?

Trauma bonding is a common condition among narcissistic abuse survivors and their abusers.

Thanks to an ongoing cycle of intermittent reinforcement, many survivors of toxic relationships go through this, much like kidnapping victims and hostages do. It closely resembles drug and alcohol addiction.

Through trauma bonding, we are literally addicted to our toxic relationships, and that is why it’s so much harder to end a relationship with a narcissist than anyone else. Just like any addict, we need to recover from our toxic relationships and gain control over our addiction.

What is Pink Clouding in Narcissistic Abuse Recovery?

The term pink clouding was originally used to describe the feeling of euphoria that many people experience after they stop using drugs or alcohol. 

Like a real pink cloud, it’s often accompanied by feelings of happiness and giddiness—and when you’re in the middle of it, it feels great!

Now, we also apply the phrase to the same type of phase for survivors in narcissistic abuse recovery.

But as lovely as it feels, there’s a dark side for anyone on the pink cloud – including survivors of narcissistic abuse.

Toxic Love as a Drug

A lot of people don’t recognize how similar toxic relationships and narcissistic abuse can be to a drug or alcohol – we really do feel addicted.

However, while you might want to hold onto those feelings forever (and who could blame you?), they don’t last forever.

In fact, usually only about two weeks after leaving a narcissist (or drug of choice) does this “high” begin to fade away.

The good news is that even though your mood may not be as fabulous as it was during the love-bombing phase of the toxic relationship, there are still plenty of things for you to do with yourself once you’ve detoxed.

How does pink clouding affect you in narcissistic abuse recovery?

When you’re dealing with narcissistic abuse for an extended period of time, your brain adjusts its chemistry in order to cope with the narcissist and the abuse.

So, when the narcissist stops being in your day-to-day life, your brain has to reset itself back to normal levels of chemicals like serotonin, dopamine, and adrenaline.

This sort of leaves you neurologically confused about how much of each chemical it needs for normal functioning, and it puts you into a tailspin.

You’ll have ups and downs, and you won’t quite grasp how to emotionally regulate yourself.

In other words, the trauma bonds that you develop with narcissists affect the same part of the brain as any other addiction, and so your brain functions just like the brain of an addict.

Can you really become addicted to a narcissist?

Believe it or not, you can be literally addicted to toxic relationships, and that is why it’s so much harder to end a relationship with a narcissist than anyone else.

  • Just like any addict, you need to recover from your toxic relationships and gain control over your addiction.
  • According to their initial definition, pink clouds happen to your brain when you stop consuming substances that alter your moods.
  • When you’re under the influence of these substances for an extended period of time, your brain adjusts its chemistry in order to cope with them.
  • For narcissistic abuse recovery, the substance or drug is actually the narcissist in your life.

When those substances go away and your brain has to reset itself back to normal levels of chemicals like serotonin, dopamine, and adrenaline – it gets confused about how much of each chemical it needs for normal functioning.

How do you know if you’re on the pink cloud?

The first step to your recovery is knowing what is happening to you.

If you feel like something isn’t quite right, listen to your body! Don’t ignore warning signs that come up as a result of pink clouding, and don’t neglect your recovery. If something doesn’t feel right, then it probably isn’t.

Pink clouding can sneak up on you, so don’t let your guard down just because nothing seems wrong at the present moment—if there is a problem brewing inside of you somewhere, chances are good that you’ll notice it eventually if left untreated (and even more likely than not).

Also remember: don’t be afraid to seek help from others if needed; having someone else around who understands what’s going on with us could make all the difference between an early diagnosis or late-stage pink clouding (which can lead to much worse symptoms).

Why is pink clouding dangerous for survivors of narcissistic abuse? 

There is only one problem with the “pink cloud” syndrome – and that is quite simply that it can make people dangerously overconfident in themselves and their recovery.

This overconfidence can sadly lead to a relapse. It doesn’t happen to everyone, but it happens to many in narcissistic abuse recovery as well.

For example, when you first leave a narcissist, you can start to see the possibilities of a life without constant control and codependency.

You feel like you’ve overcome your trauma bonding and you have all of this hope – you feel like you’re on top of the world!

With all of this new goodness coming your way, you start to think this is how you’re going to feel all the time. Like life has just turned on a dime and the only way to go is up.

It is an amazing feeling! And while I want to tell you to hold on to it as long as you can, I also want to be realistic with you and let you know that it won’t last forever.

You’re still human and you’ll still have bad days. In fact, I would venture to say, you may find yourself feeling a sudden drop from the cloud, and you’ll feel like you’ve crashed back to earth in a most undignified way.

Reality will set back in and you’ll realize that even without the toxic person in your life, there are still difficulties and hard times.

Why do people experience pink clouding?

In short, pink clouding is the result of your brain becoming accustomed to life without the narcissist.

As we discussed earlier, the process of denying yourself the ability to sort of “feed” your trauma bond/addiction can be intensely painful.

In order to get through it, you have to really dig deep and summon up all the emotional strength you possess in order to make it through those first few days without your “drug of choice,” aka the narcissistic abuser you’re trying to recover from. 

Conflicting Emotions Complicate the Pink Cloud

When people are first starting out on their narcissistic abuse recovery journey, there are so many conflicting emotions running through them:

  • Fear about what’s going to happen next
  • Worry that you’ll never find anyone to love you
  • Anger at yourself for feeling like you’ve failed so miserably in your relationship 
  • Frustration at having allowed yourself to fall for a narcissist and having stayed so long
  • Sadness over leaving behind the lives they know

…and yet there is also hope that things will get better from now on.

These conflicting emotions make it hard for people just starting out with recovery because they don’t know which way their life should go anymore: forward or backward?

What are the effects of pink cloud syndrome in narcissistic abuse recovery?

You may find yourself stuck in a deep depression if you’re not careful – remember, you weren’t allowed to show your feelings completely with the narcissist, so you may have sort of numbed out in order to get through it.

Letting go of the narcissist and working on your healing will require you, at some point, to mourn the relationship and work through all the hard feelings that go with it.

When you’ve lived in this constant state of control and numbness for so long, you might find that “normal” – you know, living without someone holding you down and without someone always sort of “managing” your every move – it might feel like you’re high on life.

You can’t even recall, if you ever knew, what real life feels like – and you have most likely forgotten how it feels to deal with your emotions.

It is good to feel happy and excited – it can help you to start to heal and make intentional choices. Don’t get me wrong.

But be aware that the pink cloud will eventually dissipate and you’ll need to keep pushing through the hard parts. You might think you don’t need help and you can just start living.

And I think you CAN just start living – but you must also stick with your support groups, and/or your coach and/or therapist. Don’t assume that “pink cloud” means all done healing.

Why do people experience pink clouding?

In short, pink clouding is the result of your brain becoming accustomed to life without the narcissist.

As we discussed earlier, the process of denying yourself the ability to sort of “feed” your trauma bond/addiction can be intensely painful.

In order to get through it, you have to really dig deep and summon up all the emotional strength you possess in order to make it through those first few days without your “drug of choice,” aka the narcissistic abuser you’re trying to recover from. 

Conflicting Emotions Complicate the Pink Cloud

When people are first starting out on their narcissistic abuse recovery journey, there are so many conflicting emotions running through them:

  • Fear about what’s going to happen next
  • Worry that you’ll never find anyone to love you
  • Anger at yourself for feeling like you’ve failed so miserably in your relationship 
  • Frustration at having allowed yourself to fall for a narcissist and having stayed so long
  • Sadness over leaving behind the lives they know

…and yet there is also hope that things will get better from now on. These conflicting emotions make it hard for people just starting out with recovery because they don’t know which way their life should go anymore: forward or backward?

What can you do if you’re experiencing the pink cloud?

If you are experiencing this phenomenon, it is normal to feel excited. But don’t let the pink cloud take hold of you and cause you to relapse and go back to the narcissist.

It’s easy enough to do this without a good solid hoover maneuver; the important thing is not to give in to peer pressure or any other temptation that could lead down a road back into codependency and narcissistic abuse

How do you deal with pink clouding in narcissistic abuse recovery?

Here are some tips to help you get through the hard parts of the dissipating pink cloud.

1. Focus on finding balance.

In the relationship, all emotions are extreme. You deal with the highest highs and the lowest lows. After the relationship, start to focus on calmness and release the need to feel “extreme” emotions in order to feel normal.

2. Try to steer clear of the narcissist and places you know they will be.

Find a new route to work, or go to a different grocery store/bank, etc. Reduce the temptation of going back when you create new ways to do your business.

3. Create new routines and traditions.

After you are away from the narcissist, start creating new routines and traditions right away. Do things differently than before and when it comes to holidays and celebrations, keep the stuff you love, but release the traditions that don’t fit anymore – and in either case, add in new stuff and new ways to do things.

4. Realize that you must go no contact (or low contact) with the narcissist. 

Do not fool yourself into thinking you can be friends with this person or just see them a little bit. Addiction is addiction. You wouldn’t just take one drink if you were a recovering alcoholic, right? The same principle applies to our recovery from toxic relationships.

5. Get support from a group, a coach, or a therapist.

If you’re worried about what could happen because of your pink cloud, don’t be afraid to ask for help from professionals who know what they’re doing—they’ll be able to help you keep things on track.

Get the support you need in narcissistic abuse recovery because going it alone is not only dangerous but less effective. And stick with it. Don’t let the pink cloud push you away – at least not for too long.

You should also talk about your situation with friends and family members who have been where you are before—they’ll understand where you’re coming from, and will likely give some good advice about how best to avoid getting caught up in something dangerous again.

It’s important that people in recovery understand that their feelings are valid—it’s just as important that they realize those feelings can go away just as fast as they came along!

6. Take care of yourself and be prepared for triggers.

Make sure you’re taking care of yourself during the narcissistic abuse recovery process. Self-care is so important for a number of reasons – primarily because you probably haven’t had much opportunity to focus on yourself for years or even decades. It’s also important to watch for triggers and have a plan in place for when one hits you.

7. Keep your eye on the prize!

Narcissistic abuse recovery is not easy, so it’s really important that you remember why you’re doing all of this – you’re working on creating the life you want and deserve. And it’s about time!

Podcast on Pink Clouding in Narcissistic Abuse Recovery

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Get Unstuck with this ONE Thing

Get Unstuck with this ONE Thing

The Secret To Self Motivation – It’s Motivational Monday! Today we’re talking about how to get stuff done when you’re feeling stuck. So often, when we’re dealing with the aftermath of a toxic relationship, we find ourselves feeling stuck and like we just can’t get anything done. Today, we’re talking about exactly what you can do to stop feeling stuck and start getting stuff done!

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