What should you put in your DIY Self-Care Kit? That’s entirely up to you. But here are a few ideas to get you thinking.
- Self-Care Journal
- Pens (I love the ones linked here and use them with my own Bullet Journal)
- Books on Self-Care (Or See My List Here)
- Stress Ball
- Expensive Chocolate
- Coloring books
- Markers or pastel crayons
- Meditation Chair
- Mindfulness Workbook
- Bath Salts and Add-Ins
- Manicure Kit
- Pedicure Kit
- Foot Spa
- Foot Lotion
- Golden Facials Masks
- Eye Mask
- Warming Pillow
- Sleep Mask
- Yoga DVDs
- Lip Balm
- Water Bottle
- Essential Oils
Stuff You Can Get From QueenBeeing & LMA for Free
- PLAN to Leave
- No Contact Calendar
- Self-Esteem Assessment
- Start Living Again
- Been Gaslighted?
- Reset Button
- Divorce Your Narcissist Toolkit
- 7-Day Morning Makeover: Change Your Morning, Change Your LIFE!
- Transitioning to Life as a Single Parent: Successfully Navigate Single Parenting
- Becoming a Better Me: Strategies for reaching your full potential after narcissistic abuse
- Unleash Your Inner Greatness: Discover How To Unleash Your Inner Greatness In Just 5 Steps!
- Mandala Adult Coloring Book for Stress
- Cognitive Dissonance Toolkit
- Self-Care for the Selfless Video Playlist
- 30-Day Home Makeover
Other Helpful Stuff From QueenBeeing & LMA
- Narcissistic Abuse Recovery & Self-Care Coaching By App
- Courses Designed Specifically for Survivors at Life Makeover Academy
- Group Coaching
- One-on-One Coaching
Self-care is so much more important than we realize, and that couldn’t be more true for survivors of narcissistic abuse. Today, I’m going to help you build your very own DIY self-care kit. But first, let’s discuss why we need a self-care kit at all. Is self-care REALLY that big of a deal? I say yes. Let’s talk about it.
Self-Care, Confidence and How They’re Connected
Confidence is an inside game. True confidence comes from a sincere acceptance and love for yourself that isn’t influenced by outside forces. From the inside out, you love and appreciate who and what you are as it ever-evolves into something better. Loving yourself in this way creates space for nurturing when you aren’t feeling your best because no one knows better than you what you need.
Even the most confident people have bad days. From physical aches and pains to emotional stress, confidence doesn’t excuse you from life’s little setbacks. Confidence does, however, make taking care of yourself a bit easier. This is where self-care comes in.
Self-care is the art of nurturing and participating in activities that promote wellness, restoration, and balance. Self-care includes, but isn’t limited to, beauty, hygiene, personal interests, artistic outlets, mental health, physical health, and much more. Self-care is recognizing and responding to what your mind and body needs to be its best at any given time.
Confidence comes from knowing yourself and what you want. Confident people are fully aware of what they need to feel refreshed and better about themselves. They also understand the value of self-care and don’t feel guilty about caring for themselves, whether that means taking time alone or spending income on a massage. Their worthiness isn’t tied to the costs for self-care… their health is.
There are different sorts of self-care depending on the need. Let’s take a look!
- Physical – Physical self-care includes activities such as healthy eating, exercise, and hygienic care. Taking care of yourself may include shopping at a farmer’s market or eating organic. It might look like using high-grade essential oils or buying a titanium bike for your riding hobby. Physically caring for yourself may include monthly spa days or bi-weekly pedicures. Whatever the vehicle for pouring into yourself, it is worth it and it is vital.
- Emotional – Emotional self-care includes activities that restore your mental and physical health and give you back the clarity that is lost when overwhelm and anxiety creep in. From taking in a movie or date-night with your spouse, emotional self-care is as important as any other form of care.
- Spiritual – Spiritual self-care is the nurturing of your spirit and soul. Depending on your beliefs or your focus, this may include a religious practice, but it also includes the arts, travel, and expanding your social conscience and awareness.
- Space – Your space has a HUGE effect on your state of mind, which in turn has a huge effect on your health. It’s all connected! That’s why we must include our space (as in where we live, where we work, where we spend our time) in self-care. Check out this free 30-Day Home Makeover at LMA.
Confidence comes from within and it is from within we are restored. Confident people place a high premium on self-care and make it an integrated part of their lives. Use self-care to feel better about yourself and to model to others the benefits of caring for yourself so you can better care for those who depend on you.
So, what do we put in our DIY self-care kit anyway? Start here.
Every survivor of narcissistic abuse goes through a healing process that can be long and painful. Taking care of yourself in the process is one highly effective and incredibly important way to start really changing your life for the better. Here’s a list of 12 self-care books every survivor of narcissistic abuse should read. See how to create a DIY self-care kit and why you should bother.
- Girl, Wash Your Face: Stop Believing the Lies About Who You Are So You…By Rachel Hollis
- You Are a Badass®: How to Stop Doubting Your Greatness and…By Jen Sincero
- The Power of Habit: Why We Do What We Do in Life and Business By Charles Duhigg
- The Book of Joy: Lasting Happiness in a Changing World by Dalai Lama
- The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck: A Counterintuitive Approach to Living a Good Life by Mark Manson
- The Power of Now: A Guide to Spiritual Enlightenment By Eckhart Tolle
- How to Be an Imperfectionist: The New Way to Self-Acceptance, Fearless Living... By Stephen Guise
- The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You’re Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are by Brené Brown
- Declutter Your Mind: How to Stop Worrying, Relieve Anxiety, and Eliminate Negative Thinking By SJ Scott
- The Wisdom of Sundays: Life-Changing Insights from Super Soul Conversations By Oprah Winfrey
- The Rest is Still Unwritten: How to Rewrite Your Story After Narcissistic Abuse by Angela Atkinson
- 100 Days to Greatness: The Whole Life Fix Movement: Your Ultimate Guide to Help You Stop Doubting Yourself and Start Living Your Perfect Life
Most survivors appreciate the relaxation that comes with a hot bath. However, you may not be getting as much out of soaking in a hot tub as you could be.
Rather than just getting clean and relaxing your muscles, why not do a mental and emotional cleanse at the same time while also enhancing other energies?
Learn how to cleanse the body and mind while boosting energy and sex drive below.
A basic cleanse requires only sage and salt.
- Sprinkle sea salt in your bathtub.
- Light a sage wand or sprinkle some sage on a tea light candle and place it in the bathroom.
- Combining these two things helps clear your negative energies as you wash them away from head to toe.
- If you are experiencing a traumatic time, now is the perfect time to let those tears flow.
- Have a good cry, wash the negativity away, and let it go down the drain with the bath water.
Cleanse to Boost General Energy
Sometimes the surrounding negativity can cause you to feel drained. In truth, the very elements and people who make you feel drained do so because they are taking some of your positive energy.
You can boost yourself by removing their negative effects through the basic cleanse and enhancing your own energy levels simultaneously with the help of some aromatherapy.
Recommended Aromatherapy Scents for Cleansing Baths
Below are some scents you can add to your bath water or bathroom to help regain your lost energy.
Cleanse to Boost Sexual Energy
If you feel a little less…lusty… for your partner than usual, a cleanse will help get you back to your foundation, assuming your partner isn’t a narcissist – in which case you have a whole other issue.
However, aromatherapy can go a long way toward increasing your sex drive in particular.
- Add some essential oils to your cleansing bath, in the bathroom, or in the lotions you put on after a bath.
- You can also use them in the bedroom, sprinkled on the bed, in a cotton ball next to the bed, or even a few drops on the pillow.
Recommended Essential Oils for Increasing Sex Drive and Sexuality
Below are some of the scents that promote an increased sex drive and sexuality in general.
As you can see, a couple of scents provide more than one type of energy boost. They also have other healing qualities outside of energy levels. These are the scents you should always have on hand if you want to let nature help you live a satisfying lifestyle in general.
Are you struggling with narcissistic abuse in a toxic relationship? Get help now.
Online help is readily available for survivors of narcissistic abuse. Here are some options to begin healing from narcissistic abuse right away.
- Sign up for our free email newsletter service that includes a free guided recovery experience via your inbox.
- Start your narcissistic abuse recovery here with our free narcissistic abuse recovery support system and program.
- Think you might have C-PTSD, but you’re not sure? Then, take our free C-PTSD Self-Assessment.
- Join one of our free online narcissistic abuse recovery support groups!
- Join one of our private small coaching groups!
- Get private, one-on-one narcissistic abuse recovery coaching or counseling.
- Get a therapist who will work with you online. Check out our guide to finding a therapist or psychologist who understands narcissism and narcissistic abuse.
- Learn more about the narcissist’s cycle of abuse.