Create A Calm Down Ritual For Yourself

Written by ProjectBlissful

This will sound totally obvious, but the best way to combat anxiety is to calm down. Of course, it’s also pretty clear for most narcissistic abuse survivors that this is far easier said than done.

But good news: over the next month, I’m sharing all of my best tips and ideas to help you start to do that.

We discussed breathing exercises recently, but the problem with breathing exercises is that when you’re already very anxious, it can be hard to make yourself calm down enough to try them, or to find both the willpower and concentration to make it happen.

This is when a calm down ritual will come in handy.

Your ritual can be as short or involved as you need it to be. It could simply be a short mantra that you repeat in your head while doing some breathing exercises until you’ve calmed down. Or it could be as involved as getting home, lighting a candle with a calming scent, fixing a cup of herbal tea, and listening to soft music while you sip it sitting in your favorite chair, covered by a weighted blanket. It all depends on what will work for you and what you can fit into your life.

Ideally, you want a simple ritual that you can do anytime, anywhere. Focusing on breathing and meditation techniques, going for a quick walk, or listening to music or a guided meditation on your phone will all work well for these situations.

While this works well for some of us at least some of the time, it isn’t always enough. Sometimes you need something more involved and to be in a space where you feel safe (like your home), to truly calm down and get rid of the anxiety. In those cases, do your best to make it through the day, by thinking about the fact that you can get started with your ritual the minute you walk in the door.

Now it’s your turn.

  • Think about some of the things you do already that help you calm down and reduce anxiety.
  • Add a few other things to the list that you’ve been meaning to try, like using essential oils, a hot bath in Epsom salt, or a new meditation technique or yoga pose for example.
  • Make a short list and then see if you can come up with two different types of rituals.
  • One should be short and mobile, the other a little more involved but helpful when you feel particularly anxious or stressed.
  • Try them out, and if they work well for you, practice them regularly, so they become an actual ritual and your default solution when you’re feeling stressed.
  • If something doesn’t work, or doesn’t quite feel right, keep changing and tweaking until it does. Remember, this is your ritual and the only person it has to work for is you.

Here are some tips for using simple NLP (neuro-linguistic programming) techniques to help you get and stay calm in the moment.


  • ProjectBlissful

    Regardless of your age, sex, race, weight, nationality or financial situation, you can begin to affect change throughout your whole life by taking some very simple steps. A hint? It all starts in your head–and your heart. Project Blissful is a movement toward whole-life healing, growth and improvement. It’s more than a movement–it’s a real whole-life project that anyone can join and participate in at anytime.

Get Guided Help with Your Narcissistic Abuse Recovery

Subscribe and get a special email series from Angie – packed with free gifts to help you heal and evolve!

Where are you in your recovery?



We won’t send you spam. Unsubscribe at any time.

Powered By ConvertKit

Award for Angie’s YouTube Channel

Disclosure – Click to Read


You're not alone.

We have been there and we can help you heal.

Related Articles

Refund Information

We are all going through a difficult time as our community is grieving the loss of our coach and guiding light, Angie Atkinson. All refunds will start processing in January. Please get in touch with us about any refunds that we need to give out. You can contact us at...

What is NLP (Neurolinguistic Programming)?

What is NLP (Neurolinguistic Programming)?

If you're struggling to recover from narcissistic abuse, you might be interested in learning about Neuro-Linguistic Programming or NLP.  It's a surprisingly simple yet highly effective treatment for symptoms of complex post-traumatic stress disorder (C-PTSD)...

Get Guided Help with Your Recovery & Stay Up to Date With The Latest News & Updates

Join the SPANily! Start with our free newsletter.

Subscribe and get a special email series from Angie - packed with free gifts to help you heal and evolve!

    Where are you in your recovery?
    We respect your privacy. Unsubscribe at any time.
    Powered By ConvertKit

    Pin It on Pinterest

    Share This

    Share this post with someone who needs it!