“The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its own reason for existing.” ~Albert Einstein
When you were a kid, you asked questions–a lot of them. Your curiosity and thirst for knowledge led you to keep asking. People told you that “curiosity killed the cat” if you got too nosy. You felt really bad for that poor cat, so you slowed down on the questions.
Well, I’m here to tell you that they straight-up lied to you, friends. The cat didn’t die from curiosity. It’s all a lie, an attempt to keep you in the little box that society has made for you.
It’s time to step out of that box and ask some real questions.
Now that you’re an adult, are you still curious? Do you ask questions, or do you assume everything is what it appears to be?
These are so many good reasons to hold onto that sense of inquisitiveness–first and foremost, because you can significantly improve your life and the lives of others with simple curiosity.
Benefits of Asking Questions
Understand the world better. Kids are always trying to get explanations for how and why things work the way they do. The Socratic Method is a powerful teaching tool at any age. Seek the truth and push yourself to get to the bottom of things.
- Be more observant. Just formulating questions will broaden your horizons. You’ll become more in tune with what’s going on around you and notice patterns.
- Be a critical thinker. It’s easy to feel bombarded by loads of information and advertising in the Internet age. Some healthy skepticism is needed to sort out fact from fiction.
- Be an innovator. Challenging the status quo and old assumptions opens us up to positive change. You may discover new ways to trim your grocery budget or spend more time with your family.
- Be more confident. Maybe you feel foolish asking questions or assume you’re supposed to know everything. Taking risks by opening up to others can actually make you feel more self assured.
- Open the lines of communication. Consulting with others demonstrates your interest and respect for their knowledge and opinions. That opens the way to improved dialogue.
What to Learn About Your Relationship
- Are you really compatible? Before you get deeply involved, make sure you’re on the same page about important issues. Do you both want kids? Can you accept each other’s weaknesses?
- Once you’re in the relationship, it’s not too late. Ask how you can improve together. What can you do to make your spouse or partner feel more loved? How can you be more successful financially? Are you on the same page when it comes to how you want to raise kids or which area of the country you live in? You need to understand what each of you wants and how to best compromise so that both are happy and fulfilled.
Asking these kinds of questions can help you to connect more deeply. It’s easy to talk at a superficial level but stronger bonds form when you probe further. Talk about your core beliefs and greatest challenges. Use the knowledge you gather about yourselves and each other to support each other. Work on improving yourselves, your relationship and your community.
Your Career: Important Questions
- What do you like to do? Interview yourself. Take an inventory of your leisure activities to identify how you like to spend your time and what gives you the greatest sense of satisfaction.
- What are you good at? Explore how you can make a career out of doing what you love. Reach out to others to invite additional suggestions and feedback.
- How’s your resume looking? Examine your resume. Does it demonstrate a clear career path or are you drifting from one job to the next? Consider the training and experience you’ll need to move closer to your goals.
Other Aspects of Life: Things to Consider
- Do you feel that your life is meaningful? Draft your own statement of what you want to get out of life and what makes you happy. Others can provide helpful input, but you’re the only one who can answer such questions.
- What are you grateful for? Practice being thankful for the things that are good in your life, such as your health, family and natural beauty. Keeping your blessings fresh in your mind will elevate your mood, lower your stress and make all your activities feel more effortless.
- How can you help others? Helping others is one of the most effective sources of lasting gratification. Ask how you can contribute to creating a better world. Remind yourself how much better you feel when you work for the common good instead of focusing on yourself alone.
Never stop asking questions! Becoming more inquisitive will make life more interesting and rewarding. You may even become a better citizen, friend and employee. In any case, you’ll find life more fulfilling when you ask questions.
Angela Atkinson is a Certified Life Coach and the author of more than 20 books on narcissism, narcissistic abuse recovery and related topics. A recognized expert on narcissism and narcissistic personality disorder who has studied and written extensively on narcissistic relationships since 2006, Atkinson was inspired to begin her work as a result of having survived toxic relationships of her own.
Atkinson offers trauma-informed coaching and has certifications in life coaching, level 2 therapeutic model, CBT coaching, integrative wellness coaching, and NLP. She is a certified trauma support coach and certified family trauma professional. She also has a professional PTSD counseling certification. Her mission is to help those who have experienced the emotional and mental devastation that comes with narcissistic abuse in these incredibly toxic relationships to (re)discover their true selves, stop the gaslighting and manipulation and move forward into their genuine desires – into a life that is exactly what they choose for themselves.
Along with her solution-focused life coaching experience, Atkinson’s previous career in journalism and research helps her to offer both accurate and understandable information for survivors of abuse in a simple-to-understand way that helps to increase awareness in the narcissistic abuse recovery community. Atkinson founded QueenBeeing.com Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Support, the SPANily Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Support Groups and the Life Makeover Academy. In her life coaching practice, Atkinson’s clients enjoy her personalized approach that allows and encourages them to become the best possible versions of themselves and to succeed in doing what they love most. She offers individual and group coaching for victims and survivors of narcissistic abuse at NarcissisticAbuseRecovery.Online and NarcissismSupportCoach.com.