Let me ask you a question. As a survivor of narcissistic abuse, do you have a good support system in place for those bad days when the anxiety becomes too much, or you start to slide into depression? A handful of people who are there for you, that you can use as a soundboard and whose shoulders you can lean on can be invaluable in times of high anxiety?
We’ve talked in the past about the fact that we can get in a spiral of anxiety that it’s hard to get out of. We are anxious and worried, which in turn makes us more anxious and worried about being anxious and worried. You get the idea. If you rely solely on yourself in those situations, it can be hard to get out of your own head long enough to look at the situation objectively and realize that things aren’t nearly as bad or frightening as they seem. This is where that support system will come in handy.
Think about the people in your life that you are close to. Who gets you? Who understands the anxiety you suffer from? Who is a good at pulling you out when you’re having a bad day by offering a hug, drags you out for coffee, or uses humor to make you forget what you’re anxious about, even for just a few minutes?
While you may not feel like socializing when you’re having a rough day or week, or if the idea of spending time with people in itself may make you a little anxious (particularly if you’re an introvert), social contact and connections are important. We are at our core social creatures. That’s why it’s important to set up that support system and reach out to it in times of need.
Of course, you aren’t limited to your circle of family and friends when it comes to this support system. Maybe you aren’t comfortable sharing your anxiety issues with them. Maybe they aren’t willing or in a position to provide you with the encouragement and support you need. Or maybe they just aren’t quite enough help. That’s ok.
Finding a support group or can be a big help. A therapist can be another key figure in your support system. If you are seeing a therapist right now, or are working with a life coach, ask them for help to build out the rest of your support system. Most importantly, don’t hesitate to reach out to your system when you’re in need. They are here to help.