If you’re in a relationship with a toxic narcissist (or have ever been in one), you might have a few boundary issues, am I right? One of the hardest parts about being involved with a narcissist is learning to set firm boundaries with them. Narcissists tend to have poor boundaries themselves. Not only do they feel they need to win and to maintain power, but they most certainly do not like others setting boundaries with them.
To establish healthy boundaries, you need to be clear with your partner who you are, what you want, your beliefs and values, and specifically what your limits are. Narcissists do not allow this. They are known for pushing and stepping on boundaries in order to manipulate and control you more easily.
Some narcissists even feel that they’re not bound by the law, so they won’t even follow court orders. When you think about that, you can easily see why they find personal boundaries so easy to step all over and ignore.
That’s exactly what we’re talking about today – why it’s so hard to set boundaries with narcissists and specifically how you can overcome this and successfully do exactly that.
The Codependent’s Guide to Setting Healthy Boundaries After a Toxic Relationship
SETTING BOUNDARIES – See The Codependent’s Guide to Setting Healthy Boundaries After a Toxic Relationship video here and learn how to set boundaries with a narcissist and how to set boundaries with healthier people after a toxic relationship.
The Gray Rock/Grey Rock Method
Worth noting: If you can’t go “No Contact” with a Narcissist because you have children with them, or you are somehow unable to get them out of your life for whatever reason, you can implement a technique called “Gray Rock”. Gray Rock is where you become as exciting and interesting as, well, a gray rock.
The goal is to blend into the background, and become the most boring, unreactive person they’ve ever met. The reason being is that if you can quit being a source of supply for their drama and attention, they will eventually leave you alone. Learn everything you need to know about the gray rock method in this video playlist.
Angela Atkinson is a certified trauma counselor and the author of more than 20 books on narcissism, narcissistic abuse recovery, and related topics. A recognized expert on narcissism and narcissistic personality disorder who has studied and written extensively on narcissistic personality disorder and narcissistic abuse in toxic relationships since 2006, she has a popular narcissistic abuse recovery YouTube channel. Atkinson was inspired to begin her work as a result of having survived toxic relationships of her own.
Atkinson offers trauma-informed narcissistic abuse recovery coaching and has certifications in trauma counseling, life coaching, level 2 therapeutic model, CBT coaching, integrative wellness coaching, and NLP. She is a certified trauma support coach and certified family trauma professional. She also has a professional PTSD counseling certification. Her mission is to help those who have experienced the emotional and mental devastation that comes with narcissistic abuse in these incredibly toxic relationships to (re)discover their true selves, stop the gaslighting and manipulation, and move forward into their genuine desires – into a life that is exactly what they choose for themselves.
Along with her solution-focused life coaching experience, Atkinson’s previous career in journalism and research helps her to offer both accurate and understandable information for survivors of abuse in a simple-to-understand way that helps to increase awareness in the narcissistic abuse recovery community. Atkinson founded QueenBeeing.com Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Support, the SPANily Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Support Groups and the Life Makeover Academy.
She offers individual and group coaching for victims and survivors of narcissistic abuse at NarcissisticAbuseRecovery.Online.