The most common reason people don’t meet their goals is not what you’d expect. It’s not that they’re setting their expectations too high or are trying to accomplish the impossible–it’s usually that they simply lose focus along the way.
As we move toward personal fulfillment in our lives, the need to set and achieve goals occurs naturally. Some of us have a natural ability to stay focused, but many of us find ourselves starting toward change with great vigor, but somehow losing our “oomph” along the way.
I know that I have personally been guilty of this on more than one occasion. Loss of oomph begets procrastination…which begets loss of determination…and one day, you realize that you’re further from your goal than you were when you started.
This pattern can be destructive and make personal fulfillment an impossible goal–or one that gets lost in the shuffle of every-day-ness that each of us experiences without fail. So how do we remain focused on our goals, even through the daily grind we call life?
I don’t have all the answers, but I can tell you what works for me. First, I find that journaling (or blogging) through the issues is like free therapy for me. For example, I’ve used blogging in the past to successfully lose weight, a considerable amount. This involved a dedicated site with other members who were also blogging (and commenting) on their own journeys. As I went through my own transformation, I documented my experience, including pitfalls, successes, and revelations (of which I had many!).
So, not only did I happen along these lightbulb moments during this process, most often AS I BLOGGED IT OUT, but I also have a record of the steps I took, the realizations and realities I faced, and what worked to get past the hard times.
I know what you’re thinking. “Great, so I have a record. What good does THAT do me?”
Well, here it is folks. If you lose focus on your goals or find yourself unsure of what to do, you can always go back to basics. For example, if I lose focus on my health, I can go back to those blogs and use them as a guide to find my way back. It’s amazing how our lives seem to flow in a pattern, and blogging or journaling as we work through our issues and make new connections within ourselves is a great way to make the process smoother.
Angela Atkinson is a Certified Life Coach and the author of more than 20 books on narcissism, narcissistic abuse recovery and related topics. A recognized expert on narcissism and narcissistic personality disorder who has studied and written extensively on narcissistic relationships since 2006, Atkinson was inspired to begin her work as a result of having survived toxic relationships of her own.
Atkinson offers trauma-informed coaching and has certifications in life coaching, level 2 therapeutic model, CBT coaching, integrative wellness coaching, and NLP. She is a certified trauma support coach and certified family trauma professional. She also has a professional PTSD counseling certification. Her mission is to help those who have experienced the emotional and mental devastation that comes with narcissistic abuse in these incredibly toxic relationships to (re)discover their true selves, stop the gaslighting and manipulation and move forward into their genuine desires – into a life that is exactly what they choose for themselves.
Along with her solution-focused life coaching experience, Atkinson’s previous career in journalism and research helps her to offer both accurate and understandable information for survivors of abuse in a simple-to-understand way that helps to increase awareness in the narcissistic abuse recovery community. Atkinson founded QueenBeeing.com Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Support, the SPANily Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Support Groups and the Life Makeover Academy. In her life coaching practice, Atkinson’s clients enjoy her personalized approach that allows and encourages them to become the best possible versions of themselves and to succeed in doing what they love most. She offers individual and group coaching for victims and survivors of narcissistic abuse at NarcissisticAbuseRecovery.Online and NarcissismSupportCoach.com.