When I woke up this morning, I was feeling a little bit sorry for myself. After all, it’s Mother’s Day, and while I am very blessed to have three beautiful children, this year, it felt a little bittersweet.
See, my oldest son (going on 17 in July) has made a poor choice in his young life; one that caused our family to have to change drastically. And thanks to choices others have made, our lives won’t ever be the same.
But as a family, we are working through it and we are confident that he will be just fine when he’s through with his treatment. He even wrote me a beautiful Mother’s Day poem that brought tears to my eyes (I shared that today on our Facebook page, if you’d like to read it–of course I’d highly recommend it!)
And my beloved mother-in-law passed away in December. Today, I’m really feeling her.
And maybe it was her influence that caused me to wake up and change my attitude.
But though I allowed myself a moment to wallow (and another second when I saw someone post a Facebook status about unconditional love), I quickly got over it.
In fact, when I heard my husband and son making coffee as they prepared to surprise me with breakfast in bed, I almost felt guilty for feeling anything other than joy.
The fact is that I have three beautiful, healthy kids and a husband who loves me to the moon and back. And we are about to move into our dream home and begin the next amazing leg on this journey of life. How can I be anything less than grateful?
(The photo here was taken a few years ago after my daughter’s first dance recital.)
My point is this: no matter where you are today and how you’re feeling, try taking a moment to focus not on what’s bothering you or what makes you sad about your life, but on what makes you feel happy, thrilled, grateful, loved, fulfilled.
All those things that make you smile even when no one’s looking–those are the things that you need to stay focused on today. Because the truth is that you bring about what you think about–so focus on what you want and not what you don’t.
Happy Mother’s Day to everyone who has ever had the privilege to be called Mommy. And to everyone who is or was a Mom even when she didn’t have to be.
Angela Atkinson is a Certified Life Coach and the author of more than 20 books on narcissism, narcissistic abuse recovery and related topics. A recognized expert on narcissism and narcissistic personality disorder who has studied and written extensively on narcissistic relationships since 2006, Atkinson was inspired to begin her work as a result of having survived toxic relationships of her own.
Atkinson offers trauma-informed coaching and has certifications in life coaching, level 2 therapeutic model, CBT coaching, integrative wellness coaching, and NLP. She is a certified trauma support coach and certified family trauma professional. She also has a professional PTSD counseling certification. Her mission is to help those who have experienced the emotional and mental devastation that comes with narcissistic abuse in these incredibly toxic relationships to (re)discover their true selves, stop the gaslighting and manipulation and move forward into their genuine desires – into a life that is exactly what they choose for themselves.
Along with her solution-focused life coaching experience, Atkinson’s previous career in journalism and research helps her to offer both accurate and understandable information for survivors of abuse in a simple-to-understand way that helps to increase awareness in the narcissistic abuse recovery community. Atkinson founded QueenBeeing.com Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Support, the SPANily Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Support Groups and the Life Makeover Academy. In her life coaching practice, Atkinson’s clients enjoy her personalized approach that allows and encourages them to become the best possible versions of themselves and to succeed in doing what they love most. She offers individual and group coaching for victims and survivors of narcissistic abuse at NarcissisticAbuseRecovery.Online and NarcissismSupportCoach.com.