Occasionally, I like to wax all philosophical on your asses, and today, I’m doing exactly that.
As someone who has lost 110 pounds and counting, so far, I think I have a pretty good idea of what it takes to lose weight and keep it off–at least for me.
So, with that being said, I present to you these harsh truths about losing weight.
Hold on to your hats, people. This is serious. And don’t get your panties all in a bunch–I only tell you these things because I care. Truly. 🙂
Harsh Truth #1: Over-thinking is just a way to delay your success. Seriously. Stop it!
It is way too easy to get caught up in every new theory and research bit that comes out.
I can’t tell you how many people I know, both personally and professionally, who jump on every weight loss and study bandwagon that clamors into their frame of reference.
One week, they’re talking about how if you’re not juicing, you’re totally not living right.
And then the next week, they’re cutting out all carbs (including the fruits and veggies they raved about last week) and eating three-pound steaks for every meal.
The unfortunate thing is that for all the diet-jumping they do, they rarely ever lose any significant poundage–and they often end up weighing more than they did when they started.
And yea, I know someone like that, personally.
So much so, in fact, that the person has maintained nearly the same weight (plus or minus a few pounds) for more than two years–a time during which a weight loss effort was supposedly being made. But the friend couldn’t see the forest through the trees. By focusing so hard on what everyone else was saying, the friend was not noticing what really matters.
That, my friends, does not work. Take it from me–find what works for you and stick to it.
Harsh Truth #2: Magic pills do not exist.
Listen, if there was a pill that allowed you to eat everything in sight and never gain a pound, I would totally own stock in that company!
Now, don’t get me wrong here–there are supplements and stuff that can help you along on your journey–but you cannot just take a freaking pill and keep eating 18 billion calories a day while sitting on your ass and expect to drop 100 pounds in a month or two.
That just doesn’t happen. Take it from me. I have tried every so-called magic pill out there–and aside from the icky side effects, the only thing they succeeded in doing for me was draining my bank account.
Seriously. Stop buying into bullshit that wastes your money and your time.
Harsh Truth #3: You have to eat less and exercise more if you wanna get and keep the weight off.
Yeah, I said it. And yeah, it sucks.
A little bit, anyway.
But the truth is that while you can absolutely lose weight without much exercise (hey, I lost my first 60 pounds that way), you really do have to get your groove on if you want to get it off and keep it off.
Not only does gaining muscle help to tone and define your body, but since muscle burns more fat than…well, fat, you will be able to eat more and still look freaking amazing when all is said and done.
Harsh Truth #4: Some of your friends won’t support you.
Whether we like it or not, sometimes jealousy can make a friend behave in a way she might not otherwise.
So, when you find yourself swimming in the traveling pants you and your BFF have shared for years, don’t be surprised when she starts getting a little bitchy. She might even try to sabotage your efforts or stop accepting your calls.
But if she does, remember that it’s not your fault. She is looking at you, seeing what she’s not getting right–and feeling bad about herself. And in some cases, she’s literally “just jealous” of your success.
Don’t be mad at her–she’s only human.
The best thing you can do here is to remind yourself that you are freaking amazing, and then, if you love your friend, support her in any way possible. And hey–remind her that she’s amazing and beautiful too. Sometimes, just a little extra attention can help, especially if your activities together used to revolve around food.
Whatever you do, though, do not allow yourself to be dragged down by anyone’s negativity. You are getting healthy, doing something right for yourself and your health. Breathe, and let the negativity go.
Harsh Truth #5: If you’re going to keep it off, don’t expect to lose it overnight.
For me, taking the weight off slowly has been the key.
Since I started taking my journey seriously about two years ago, I’ve lost 110 pounds.
I’ve still go a few to go, but at a size 8 and curves in (almost) all the right places, I’m not complaining–especially because these results were totally worth the weight…er, wait. 🙂
Yeah, pun intended.
I did it by making small, manageable changes, and nothing more. It all started with simply making sure I was drinking eight glasses of water every day.
And then, I started keeping track of my food intake–at first, just keeping track, not promising myself to stick to the plan (although, to be fair, tracking just makes you want to stick to the plan!).
The point is, it has taken me just more than two years to get the first 110 pounds off. And I’m expecting to get the last few off within this year. It’s not a big rush for me at this point (who can afford to keep buying whole new wardrobes!). It’s just that I have a goal, and I know I’ll reach it eventually.
But hey–if making one small change at a time could help me go from being seriously obese to being pretty much healthy in a matter of two years, and it didn’t cause me a great deal of heartache or pain–wasn’t it the right way to go?
Especially if I can now understand my body and its signals on a whole new level, which gives me the freedom to eat whatever I want and stay healthy?
Yes. Yes, it’s worth it. Totally. Freaking. Worth. It.
That is all.
Don’t be mad. It’s all true.
What do you think? Am I being too harsh? Share your thoughts and your own harsh truths in the comments section, below.
Angela Atkinson is a certified trauma counselor and the author of more than 20 books on narcissism, narcissistic abuse recovery, and related topics. A recognized expert on narcissism and narcissistic personality disorder who has studied and written extensively on narcissistic personality disorder and narcissistic abuse in toxic relationships since 2006, she has a popular narcissistic abuse recovery YouTube channel. Atkinson was inspired to begin her work as a result of having survived toxic relationships of her own.
Atkinson offers trauma-informed narcissistic abuse recovery coaching and has certifications in trauma counseling, life coaching, level 2 therapeutic model, CBT coaching, integrative wellness coaching, and NLP. She is a certified trauma support coach and certified family trauma professional. She also has a professional PTSD counseling certification. Her mission is to help those who have experienced the emotional and mental devastation that comes with narcissistic abuse in these incredibly toxic relationships to (re)discover their true selves, stop the gaslighting and manipulation, and move forward into their genuine desires – into a life that is exactly what they choose for themselves.
Along with her solution-focused life coaching experience, Atkinson’s previous career in journalism and research helps her to offer both accurate and understandable information for survivors of abuse in a simple-to-understand way that helps to increase awareness in the narcissistic abuse recovery community. Atkinson founded QueenBeeing.com Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Support, the SPANily Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Support Groups and the Life Makeover Academy.
She offers individual and group coaching for victims and survivors of narcissistic abuse at NarcissisticAbuseRecovery.Online.