Thoughts on this post? Share them with me on Facebook, join the SPANily or Tweet me at @angieatkinson. ~Angie

“Girl power is about loving yourself and having confidence and strength from within, so even if you’re not wearing a sexy outfit, you feel sexy.” ~Nicole Scherzinger

Okay, so if you’ve been keeping up, you have some ideas on exactly what men find sexy, and you even know what men say makes a woman good in bed.

But do you know how to use this information to your advantage?

Your only limit is your mind – which, btw, is also so much more powerful than you realize when it comes to creating this kind of personal change.

Especially when it comes to appearance and bodily issues, the power of both intention and “vibe management” (keeping your mind and energy in a positive space) is actually a tool that is often ignored when we’re working to change.

Regardless of the reason for it, if you are not satisfied with your life, it might mean a change in your mindset is in order.

The Sexy-Girl Mindset

Ever feel like you’re not good enough, or like everyone is just somehow hotter/sexier/more attractive than you? 

Well, girl I’m here to tell you – that shit is all in your head. Excuse my language.

Truly, though, it’s really your personal vibe, your perspective and overall attitude that round out your sexy-girl mindset.

There’s no single definition of “hot” or “sexy,” and the word sexy doesn’t mean the same thing to everyone.  

But I think regardless of their individual preferences, most normal healthy adults find that it’s incredibly sexy when they meet someone who knows what she wants in from her life and isn’t afraid to go after it. Passion makes us more powerful. And positive power is always sexy, regardless of the context. 

It really is so easy to blame others for not having what you want in life – it doesn’t make you a bad person, it makes you HUMAN. I mean, seriously, why is it that everyone else but you seems to get what they want?

But hey there, sexy-girl, you’re missing a big, important part of the whole package here – and I’m about to blow your mind when I tell you why it matters so very much.

YES! It Matters! Here’s Why.

I’m going to put this in the simplest possible terms: if you want to be sexy, you’ve got to BELIEVE you’re sexy, ACT like you’re sexy and BE sexy. It all happens from within, believe it or not.

Yeah, your personal style and the makeup you wear can make a difference – but in reality, it’s all about the way you carry yourself, your perception of the world and the way you relate to the people and situations you’re involved with.

All of this makes up your sexy-girl mindset – and the mindset is where it all begins. You could look like Megan Freaking Fox, but if you feel ugly, you’ll be ugly. I PROMISE YOU, that’s how it works. Stick with me and I’ll show you how. 


Now, listen up, and listen good.

Being sexy doesn’t mean you look a certain way or wear certain clothing. There is no single look that every single person alive will find sexy.

Physical attractiveness can enhance your level of sexy for sure, but it cannot BE your only form of sexy.

I asked more than 100 guys what they found sexy, and you would be surprised to find out that while their answers about physical attractiveness were as different as night and day and waffles, there were a couple of common themes.

Mostly, if you want to be attractive to a guy, you’ve got to know exactly what you want out of life and be prepared to go after it. And you’ll have true passion for both him and your own dreams for your future/success/life.

Sexy-Girl Attitude, Confidence and Mindset 101

So how do you develop your attitude, increase your confidence levels and get that sexy-girl mindset? You can start by using the following tips:

  1. Say thank you. A lot. Early. Often. Always be grateful for what you do have in your life. Stop concentrating on what you don’t have. Negative thinking uses up a ton of energy, so why not put your energy into positive thinking instead? Be grateful that you have a family and good health instead of focusing about having to be stuck in traffic on the highway each day.  
  2. Find like-minded people. You can improve your outlook by surrounding yourself with positive thinking people. Find people that have the same goals as you and spend time with them. Their positive energy will rub off on you and you will start acting and thinking in a more positive way.
  3. Think sexy thoughts; sexy, positive thoughts. Change your mindset from frumpy to fabulous by thinking intentionally sexy and positive thoughts each day. It can help to use sexy girl mindset quotes, find ones that you like and start using them on a daily basis. Thinking in a positive manner can actually help to relieve your stress and any signs of depression. Stop thinking about things that could go wrong. Instead focus on how they can turn out better than you expected.
  4. Go DEEP (with your breath). Fresh air can really help clear your head and change your perception for the better. It is so easy to spend too much time inside at your computer or in front of the TV. Make time to get outside and take advantage of the natural sunlight. It can do wonders for your body and mind. Sit on the porch for an hour and have coffee with someone. Even better, get out and move your ass.  There is no better combination that fresh air and fun – and most of the guys I surveyed said they found an active woman sexier than a sedentary one.  
  5. Own that shit, girl. Don’t be jealous of ANYONE. Instead, notice and compliment everyone you meet on their best quality (even if you have to compliment something like their shoes, any compliment will do!). When you are always looking for the best in people, your energy becomes much more inviting. (And make sure you compliment both men and women – being a ‘mean girl’ is unattractive to MOST guys). By the law of attraction, the more compliments and love you can genuinely send out there, the more you’ll get back. What could be wrong with that?

Those are the big five things you need to know to go from frump to fab. This includes re-energizing your sexy-girl mindset. The happier you can be, the hotter you’ll find yourself looking and feeling. Let’s do this.

But first, let’s talk – tell me how YOU do sexy! PLEASE share your thoughts below – I’d love to have a discussion on this one. 


If you’d rather, you can always hit me up on Facebook.

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