Protect Yourself From a Stalker

Get a Free Safety Toolkit for Stalking Victims

Important: What to Do If You’re In Immediate Danger

Source: VictimsofCrime.org

Get Help Fast

If you are in immediate danger, do not hesitate to call 911 (or the emergency number in your country, if not in the US).
Trust yourself and your instincts. Don’t downplay the danger Too often we have a high threshold for abuse and abuse amnesia. If you feel you are unsafe, you probably are.
Take threats seriously. Danger generally is higher when the stalker talks about suicide or murder, or when a victim tries to leave or end the relationship.

Police Security & Evidence

Keep evidence of the stalking. When the stalker follows you or contacts you, write down the time, date, and place. Keep emails, text messages, phone messages, letters, or notes. Photograph anything of yours the stalker damages and any injuries the stalker causes. Ask witnesses to write down what they saw.
Contact the police. Every state has stalking laws. The stalker may also have broken other laws by doing things like assaulting you or stealing or destroying your property.
Consider getting a court order that tells the stalker to stay away from you.
Tell family, friends, roommates, and co-workers about the stalking and seek their support.
Tell the security staff at your job or school. Ask them to help watch out for your safety.

Communication

Contact a crisis hotline, victim services agency, or a domestic violence or rape crisis program. They can help you devise a safety plan, give you information about local laws, weigh options such as seeking a protection order, and refer you to other services.
Develop a safety plan, including things like changing your routine, arranging a place to stay, and having a friend or relative go places with you. Also, decide in advance what to do if the stalker shows up at your home, work, school, or somewhere else. Tell people how they can help you. Click here to learn more about safety plans.
Don’t communicate with the stalker or respond to attempts to contact you.

DIY Stalker Sacks: Protect Yourself From a Stalking Narcissist

by Angela Atkinson

Your safety is of the utmost importance when you're dealing with a stalker, whether it's your narcissistic ex or someone else. As I've been researching the subject, I've discovered a really cool concept called Stalker Sacks. These are physical bags of resources and...

Is this guy stalking his wife or is she really cheating on him?

by Angela Atkinson

So, I got an email from a reader, and I'm sharing it with his permission. There's a bit of confusion on whether or not he's being cheated on by his wife - and if he's NOT, it looks like he may be stalking her. I want my readers to know that the only reason I am...

Collecting Evidence: Protect Yourself from a Stalking Narcissist

by Angela Atkinson

When you're dealing with a narcissistic toxic ex, you may be constantly stressed about your safety, especially if they have a tendency to stalk you. Some of my clients have even said that narcissists have broken into their homes to either gaslight them or steal from...

DIY Home Security System (Protect Yourself From a Stalking Narcissist)

by Angela Atkinson

If you're dealing with a toxic ex, chances are you've got enough anxiety already. And if you can't afford a traditional home security system, you may be constantly stressing about your safety. This is not good for your physical or mental health. But there's good news...

6 Shocking Places Cameras Can Be Hidden: Protecting Yourself from a Spying Narcissist

by Angela Atkinson

Are you worried that your narcissist is gaslighting you through technology? If so, you need to know the inside track on spy cameras, also known simply as spy cams. Perform a standard search online and you will be surprised with the results. It is amazing where they...

New Resources for Victims of Stalking Narcissists

by Angela Atkinson

Dear SPANily, Due to what I see as a serious issue, I've created a new set of resources for you. As you may or may not be aware, many toxic relationships end in stalking. In fact, many survivors of narcissistic abuse are stalked during the relationship and after as...