Toxic Narcissist in Your Life? 35+ Tools and Resources That Can Help

Toxic Narcissist in Your Life? 35+ Tools and Resources That Can Help

Update: Click here to visit our new resources center. 

Looking for tools, tips, resources and help with a narcissist in your life? Then you’ve come to the right place. I’ve collected more than 35 of them for you, right here.

I have written several books on narcissism, but I know that not everyone can have books delivered and/or doesn’t have the cash for the Kindle editions. Or maybe they’re afraid of being found out by their very controlling narc.

Listen, I’m not here to judge. I feel you. TRUST ME.

At any rate, that’s why I’ve put together a few links for you here. If you bookmark this post and/or this site, you can refer back to it as needed to get the virtual support and/ir validation that you need.

Consider this site your very own sort of “online ebook” of sorts – no charge, no strings attached. Just because I know how important it is to know that you’re not crazy when you’re in the thick of a relationship with a narcissist.

Is there a narcissist in your life?

Your narcissist could be anyone – your spouse, your child, your mother, your father, your boss – even your best friend or your neighbor. Here are some tips for identifying the one(s) in your life.

What is the definition of a toxic narcissist?

It’s confusing for a lot of people because people think being narcissistic means you take a bunch of selfies and care about how you look. But that’s not necessarily a toxic narcissist – the fact is that every human alive has a certain amount of narcissism in their makeup – it’s self-interest. It’s what makes us get up and get ourselves dressed, feed ourselves, get jobs, get married, have kids – it’s the part of us that prevents us from just giving up entirely.

But a toxic narcissist (or a person with NPD), is someone who has no ability to empathize with other people and who treats the people closest to them accordingly. The toxic narcissist is also referred to as a malignant narcissist.

What’s the difference between narcissism or narcissistic personality disorder and high self-esteem?

 

Are you being manipulated by the narcissist?

We all know that narcissists are master devastating emotional scars narcissism quotemanipulators.

Here are some posts to help you identify and recognize the manipulation.

Can you take control of the situation and/or overpower the narcissist?

beat a narcissist at his own gameIndeed you can, my friend, if you’re willing to stand up for yourself – at least temporarily. Once you’ve recognized the situation, you’re already one step closer. Now you need to know how to get through it. Try these posts for help and ideas.

Can you make the narcissist be nice to you WITHOUT acting like a narcissist yourself?

Yes, absolutely – and it can be done in two ethical, repeatable steps – check it out right here.

Can a narcissist ever really love?

I think we both know the answer to that question, but just in case:

What are some other ways a narcissist will manipulate me?

You might already know all about gaslighting, but that’s just one way that narcissists manipulate people. Here are a few others.

Can you show me an example of real-life gaslighting?

I don’t usually share many personal stories about the gaslighting I have experienced in my life but recently, a well-known narcissist actually gave me a little bit of an unrealized opportunity by actually gaslighting me online.

Oh yea. Online.

What if leaving my narcissist isn’t an option?

It’s not always, and you and I both know this. Unless you’re being physically abused, sometimes it feels like the wolf you know is better than the one that you don’t. But here are some posts to help you get your head in the right place and tools to help you be happier.

Is there a course or class I can take to help me recover from narcissistic abuse?

Absolutely! On this page, you’ll find all kinds of freebies, some of which include online courses. You can also visit Life Makeover Academy, NarcissismSupportCoach.com, or take my Udemy course that helps you to take back your life after narcissistic abuse, right here.

See My Books About Narcissism 

See all of my books, including those on topics such as weight loss and how to be a hot wife at BooksAngieWrote.com.

See the most recent posts about narcissism, gaslighting, and toxic relationships right here. If you have any resources for victims of narcissism in relationships, please share them in the comments section, below. 

Toxic Relationships: 44 warning signs you’re being emotionally abused

Toxic Relationships: 44 warning signs you’re being emotionally abused

44 Warning Signs That You're Being Emotionally Abused by a NarcissistAs someone who has survived and thrived despite having experienced various forms of emotional abuse, thanks to involvement with narcissists in my own life, it was often hard to see while I was in the “thick of it.”

So how do you know if the relationship is really emotionally abusive? When it’s physical abuse, it’s often pretty obvious, but emotional abuse can be incredibly hard to detect, especially if your victimizer is a narcissist.

On the plus side, there are plenty of warning signs.

If your significant other is a narcissist, he (or she) might engage in certain narcissistic behaviors and types of manipulation, such as the ever-pervasive gaslighting tactic that is the bane of so many victims of narcissistic relationships.

How to Know if You’re Being Emotionally Abused

Does your significant other:

  1. Isolate you and prevent you from spending time with friends or family members?
  2. Force you to account for your time when apart from him?
  3. Act really jealous and possessive sometimes?
  4. Make excessive and unreasonable demands for your attention, even to the detriment of your other responsibilities?
  5. Make everything “all about him?”
  6. Make you the scapegoat for all the arguments or problems in the relationship?
  7. Consider himself the “boss” and insist on making all the decisions in your relationship/family/life?
  8. Snoop through your stuff? Does he refuse to allow any privacy? Does he go through your mail, hack your email or Facebook account or go through your personal belongings?
  9. Get excessively angry without warning or over tiny things?
  10. Have the whole “Jekyll and Hyde” deal happening – where one side of him seems  charming or even sweet and loving, while the other is mean, spiteful and downright hurtful?
  11. Play games with your head? Tell lies in order to confuse you or blame you for something you didn’t do?
  12. Become overly critical of everything about you when you don’t do what he wants?
  13. Take control of everything in your life, such as your finances?
  14. Feel entitled to everything from your attention and UNCONDITIONAL respect, regardless of how he treats you?
  15. Feel entitled to your financial or other kinds of support?
  16. Cause damage and/or give away/steal your personal property?
  17. Harass you whenever you’re away from him because you have to be (such as work or school)?
  18. Make threats about how he will “ruin you” or otherwise cause trouble for you at work, to your family or to others?
  19. Say overly critical things about your body and appearance?
  20. Have weird sexual issues?
  21. Become excessively pushy or forceful about sex, or even hurt you during sex?
  22. Become angry or sullen (or even display narcissistic injury) if you don’t go along with his sexual demands?
  23. Drink excessively or take drugs, and then blame his awful behavior on alcohol, drugs or his own history of abuse or tragedy earlier in his life?
  24. Pressure you to use alcohol or other drugs, even when you say no?
  25. Cause you to become anxious about confronting him about literally anything?
  26. Threaten you with physical harm or make you feel afraid of how he will react when you speak or act in general?
  27. Manipulate you with the constant threat of mood changes and impending narcissistic rage?
  28. Make you feel like you’re always “walking on eggshells” or living with constant stress, anxiety or generally in fear?
  29. Withhold affection in order to punish you?
  30. Give you the “silent treatment” when you don’t do what he wants?
  31. Humiliate you?
  32. Expect you to ask for permission to do stuff, as though you’re a child?
  33. Threaten to hurt himself when he doesn’t get his way or if you threaten to leave?

Physical Abuse: DO NOT WAIT! 

Listen, emotional abuse is awful and can make you completely miserable. But physical abuse is a whole other ball of wax. While you should never stay in an abusive situation, you have to remember that when physical abuse is a factor, there is absolutely no fixing it – and your life could literally depend on you getting away safely.

Ask yourself, does your significant other:

  1. Physically abuse you in any way? Push, shove, grab, punch, hits or strike you with hands or fists?
  2. Threaten or assault you with weapons, such as household objects or knives?
  3. Blame you for his abusive behavior, saying things such as “look what you made me do,” or “well, if you hadn’t done that, I wouldn’t have had to hit you?”

If so, there is no time to waste – get help and get out before it’s too late. Here are some resources for you.

Sexual Abuse: GET OUT NOW!

According to Dr. Phil, the following are signs of sexual abuse. If you’re being sexually abused, you can’t wait – you need to get out ASAP. If you don’t have any support (which is unfortunately common for victims of narcissism and abuse, since abusers often isolate their victims), start here, and check out these resources as well.

You are being sexually abused if your partner:

  1. Views women as objects and believes in rigid gender roles.
  2. Accuses you of cheating or is often jealous of your outside relationships.
  3. Wants you to dress in a sexual way.
  4. Has ever forced or manipulated you into to having sex or performing sexual acts.
  5. Held you down during sex.
  6. Demanded sex when you were sick, tired or after beating you.
  7. Involved other people in sexual activities with you.
  8. Ignored your feelings regarding sex.

More Resources for Victims of Narcissists

Visit the QueenBeeing Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Resources & Support Page

If you’re in an abusive relationship with a narcissist, you might want to read one of these books.

Are you experiencing (or have you experienced) emotional abuse in a toxic relationship? Find out for sure by taking this quiz.

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