You may or not be aware of my social media goddesss/geek status–either way, you can rest assured that anytime I love anything, I do whatever I can to learn about it and to understand it in the best way possible.
You might have noticed my fashion-geek side by now, and if you’ve been reading my work long, you might already know that I geek out about everything I love.
So imagine how excited I was when People Magazine and Klout.com gave me an opportunity that incorporated several of my passions–including both fashion and social media–among others! That’s right, I’m now a #PeopleVIP!
How I Became a People VIP
Truth be told, I don’t know how special it really is to be a People VIP, but I did get some really great freebies out of the deal. I recently received a #KloutPerk that includes #PeopleVIP status–which offers me several benefits, including some awesome freebies!
For the record, I’ll be blogging more about the rest of the freebies over at AngelaAtkinson.me, or you can see all of them on my Facebook pages! (Both my professional page and the Project Blissful Style page each have some of the photos and info!)
How I Switched Up This Look, and How I’d Switch It Up for Evening
Click each photo above to view the full pic!
I love an opportunity to switch up my look, and here’s a great example of how you can change up your look with just a single accessory change. For the record, I also have this top in blue.
Later in the evening, I would switch this up by changing the jewelry, glamming up the makeup and putting on a pair of platform pumps–black and shiny or even nude. I would also wear the same look with a skirt and tights.
Take a look at this gorgeous piece to the right–I’d love to pair it with a sparkly necklace and earrings along with this outfit and a pair of heels for the evening–or even pair it with a few other sparkly baubles. (Yeah, I totally love bling–I know you had NO idea! Ha!)
Many of the most famous celebrities in both television and movies are sporting Sedu Hairstyles.
Celebrity Sedu hairstyles are one of the many latest fashion trends to come out of Hollywood. What makes the celebrity Sedu hairstyles unique though? Why are the Sedu hairstyles so popular?
The celebrity Sedu hairstyles are very popular for a lot of women who have naturally curly hair, or thicker and more course hair.
Many celebrities like Jennifer Lopez, Halle Barry, Angelina Jolie and many others do not have natural long smooth and flowing hair like you constantly see them sporting on television and in movies.
The secret of many movie stars is their celebrity Sedu Hairstyles. Why would they choose Sedu hairstyles though?
The celebrity Sedu hairstyles are very popular for a reason. The Sedu hairstyles are created using the Sedu Hair Iron. The Sedu hair iron is uniquely designed and patented using ceramic plates that are actually made of tourmaline crystals.
These are combined with a negative ionic charge in order to remove static from the hair. This alleviates the problems of cling in their celebrity Sedu Hairstyles. The end result is a Sedu Hairstyle that will last longer and look better than any other.
How do the celebrity Sedu hairstyles last longer and why? The patented ionic technology of the Sedu hair iron increases the hold in the hair. While this may not seem plausible at first, let us see why. Between the patented tourmaline ceramic plates and infrared heating technology the Sedu flat iron actually molds the hair.
The celebrity Sedu hairstyles last longer because there is no need (On most Sedu Hairstyles) for hairspray or other chemicals, which often fail when exposed to heat or light.
What about dyed hair? Actors and actresses frequently have to dye their hair and change their celebrity hairstyles in order to fit better in certain roles.
The Sedu flattener Iron is designed so that there is no conflict with dyes or tints normally used in hair coloring. The celebrity Sedu hairstyles you see can be done with any color or variety of hair.
Many ethnic actresses are big fans of the celebrity Sedu hairstyle. Often the desired result is simply to straighten curly, unruly or kinky hair.
When I was a teenager, I thought that being a “real” writer/artist type person meant that I had to be tormented, broken somehow. It seemed to me that most of my literary heroes (Plath, Hemingway, etc.) were tortured souls–people who were somehow unfit for this society–and through no fault of their own.
As far as I could tell, these genius writers were simply too smart, too sensitive, too deep for the social orders to which they were subjected.
And, as life piled up on me, I was afflicted too. As I focused on being a “tortured artist,” I attracted all sorts of dysfunctional situations into my life. No matter what I did, it seemed like I could never get ahead. I filled notebooks with the story of my self-induced pathetic life and drew more and more negativity into my world.
Of course, at that time, it never occurred to me that I was bringing it all on myself. Nope, I thought, I just can’t handle this world and this world can’t handle me. I really thought that somehow I was so different than every other person walking down the street. No one could possibly understand ME, I thought.
And then, one day, I realized the truth. I’ll be honest–it took a few years. But one day I woke up and recognized that, in my quest to become what I thought was a “real” writer/artist type person–I was basically begging for negativity. Every time I turned around, I EXPECTED the other shoe to fall–and it always did.
Post-impressionist painter Paul Gauguin once lamented, “I am a great artist and I know it. The reason I am great is because of all the suffering I have done.”
I call bullshit on that one. Yep, bullshit. Seems to me that he was great because he was talented and because he wanted to be great. Yeah, he suffered too–but I don’t believe that he picked up his paintbrush and painted several masterpieces as a direct result of it. In fact, I believe that he was a great artist BECAUSE he KNEW that he was.
As for me, I learned the hard way that life doesn’t have to suck. These days, I expect only the best. It works for me. I have learned something since my “tortured artist” days–you don’t have to be miserable to be creative–and quite honestly, misery and success aren’t actually friends. Fact is, while misery loves company, it has no interest in success.
Many creative souls have this misconception–that they must be miserable to be effectively inspired. And, hey, if that works for ya, go for it. But here’s what I know: being miserable sucks. Being happy, on the other hand, feels great. And, I don’t know about you, but I’ll take feelings of elation over feelings of dread any day.
But really, my tortured artist friends…how is that working for you? Does being unhappy really serve a purpose in your endeavors, or do you just think you must be tortured to be legit?
Personally, I think The Collective Inkwell’s Sean Platt had it right.
“I never understood the image of the pained and tortured writer, tearing clumps from their hairline as they face the impossible foe of filling the page, pulling sentences from their minds like ore from the deepest corners of a mineshaft,” he wrote.”Creativity is a garden that only grows with nutrients in the soil and sunlight in the sky. Ideas are seeds, eager to spread and germinate deep within a fertile mind. The best method to finding your best writer is to practice your craft. Complaints not included.”
So often, we feel that we need to fit into a certain mold–ironically, of course, considering that most tortured artists consider themselves outsiders–when in reality, they’re just conforming to the expectations they think society has for them.
Of course, by now you recognize that today’s post isn’t just for my fellow writers. Nope, it’s for each and every one of you. From the harried mom who never gets a minute to herself to the overworked executive who isn’t even sure what his wife looks like anymore, and all the way to the rebellious teenager who is sure his parents are dumb as a box of rocks–it’s all the same. In our efforts to exist as individuals, most of us have, at one time or another, fallen into some society-driven pattern or another. Yeah, these are stereotypes–but think on it a minute. Don’t you know someone who falls in to at least one of those categories?
Let me get to the bottom line here.
I’ve said it before, and I’m going to say it again. YOU GET WHAT YOU EXPECT. As you think, so you become. Your perception becomes your reality. And hey, you don’t have to believe little old me–just remember what author William James said: “The greatest discovery of my generation is that human beings can alter their lives by altering their attitudes of mind.”
Good stuff, no?
Today, I ask you to challenge any stereotypes that society places on you. Change your mind. Begin to see (and be) the person you want to be, the life you want to have–and then believe it’s all yours. Watch as your life changes along with your mind–and be amazed. Be happy, my friends. It really is all in your perception.
What do you think? Share your thoughts and experiences in the comments section, below!
I accept that life’s experiences sometimes come with disappointment.
I know that not every situation has the desired outcome, but I also know how to deal with those undesirable occurrences.
When I am disappointed, I avoid allowing the feelings to consume me.
I know that every disappointment happens for a reason, even if I don’t see it right away. I take a moment to assess what happened and try to find a positive message out of it.
When things don’t go my way, I feel motivated to improve so I can reap success the next time around. I look for things that I could do differently to avoid experiencing the same disappointment two times in a row.
If I submit a project at work that doesn’t meet the requirements of my employer, I take it in stride. I try to accept that even with the best effort, there is always room for me to do better. I use the opportunity to work on improving my output so the outcome is more favorable next time.
In cases where my expectations of others go unmet, I avoid using that as an opportunity to judge.
I accept that people are imperfect and can make mistakes or bad choices that disappoint others.
Today, I focus on making the most of second chances.
I focus on using a lost first opportunity to make the most of the next one and improve the outcome. I commit to not allowing disappointment to conquer me and cause me to lose focus on my goals.
Answer These Self-Reflection Questions:
How do I help others to cope with disappointment?
Do I recognize my shortcomings that lead to disappointment?
Am I able to resist the frustration that may come when I feel disappointment?
It took me a long time not to judge myself through someone else’s eyes. ~Sally Field
As I was checking my email today, I received a notification that a new comment had arrived on a post I did on this blog about how to stop feeling like you’re not good enough. This comment touched me so deeply that I felt the need to reach out to the commenter, Kate, and anyone else in her position.
I have been doing what that article recommends. Unfortunately, I’m feeling even more inferior every time. It is getting worse, day by day.
The first thing I want Kate to know is that she’s not alone. According to Dr. Joe Rubino, approximately 85% of people have experienced feelings of inferiority at some time in their lives. That’s nearly EVERYONE. I realize that doesn’t make it all better, but sometimes just knowing you’re not alone can help one begin the healing process.
And, for Kate and anyone who feels like they’re not good enough, I’d like to offer a few more suggestions, in addition to the ones made in this post.
Remember That You Are Freaking Fabulous
If you hear a voice within you say “you cannot paint,” then by all means paint, and that voice will be silenced. ~Vincent Van Gogh
Often times, when we feel like we’re not good enough, we are focusing on all of the things we think are ‘wrong’ with us. We worry that people won’t like us, or that they’ll think bad things about us. We feel like we don’t look good enough, that we’re not smart enough, that we’re just generally terrible people.
But what does this get us? More reasons to feel crappy about ourselves. So, I propose that we start focusing on the things we like about ourselves, the things that make us proud. Maybe you’re a good painter, or you can cook a perfect souffle, or you’ve never met an animal who doesn’t love you. Perhaps you have a beautiful smile, sparkling eyes or a great pair of legs. There is something special about every single person on the planet, and you’re no exception.
Sit down with a piece of paper and write down at least ten GOOD things about you. Write down things you love about your body (it gets you from point A to B, for example!), things you love about your personality (that sparkling wit of yours, maybe) and things you love about your life in general (you have good friends or a close-knit family, a roof over your head, etc.)
Then spend a few minutes feeling grateful for each thing on that list. Gratitude is a powerful tool, and when you focus and are grateful for the things you love in life, you draw more things to love into your life.
And Speaking of Gratitude
If a fellow isn’t thankful for what he’s got, he isn’t likely to be thankful for what he’s going to get. ~Frank A. Clark
Start a gratitude journal. You can even create a private blog for your gratitude journal, if you like. That’s what I did, since as a writer, I’m nearly always near a computer. Try to write in it each day. It doesn’t have to be fancy or complicated–just start each entry by saying “Today, I am so very grateful for…” and let it flow.
At first, it will feel a little awkward, but once you get going, it’ll flow like water. If you have trouble thinking of things to be grateful for, why not start with the fact that you woke up today and work from there. You can be grateful for your health, your senses, your friends and family, your home, your ability to read–the list goes on and on.
This practice alone can significantly improve your general outlook on life. And, as a nice little side effect, it can help to improve your self-esteem and feelings of self-worth. It works because as you spend more time focusing on the good things in your life and less time focusing on the things you want to change, the law of attraction works in your favor, bringing more reasons to feel good into your life.
Follow a Passion
“The more intensely we feel about an idea or a goal, the more assuredly the idea, buried deep in our subconscious, will direct us along the path to its fulfillment.”~Earl Nightingale
Everyone has some thing or activity in their lives that they’re passionate about. For me, it’s writing. I have always known that I wanted to be a writer, and have followed that passion on some level for most of my life. The years I spent scribbling into a journal between meetings and writing corporate publications for the companies I worked for were a little tough, but I survived and lived to have the opportunity to follow my passion full-time.
One friend of mine is passionate about helping animals. She blogs about animals, volunteers for the Humane Society and helps raise funds for animal rights and assistance groups. Another friend is passionate about helping kids–and after getting her Masters Degree in Social Work, she has become a school social worker. Both are very happy in their lives.
While you may not have the option to “quit your day job” right now, there’s nothing stopping you from finding and following your passion on the side. Maybe you’ve always wanted to be a fashion designer. You could start by doing some research and taking some classes. If you already know how to design patterns and sew, why not start making clothes? You can set up a cheap or free website and start selling.
Nothing wrong with starting small–just do SOMETHING to follow your passion, anything at all. Give yourself permission to call yourself a fashion designer (or writer, or artist, or actor, or astronaut, or whatever you want to be.) And then go and do, be and have what you want!
Studies show that people who follow their passions, whether in their careers or just as a hobby, are significantly happier than people who don’t.
“The secret of attraction is to love yourself. Attractive people judge neither themselves nor others. They are open to gestures of love. They think about love, and express their love in every action. They know that love is not a mere sentiment, but the ultimate truth at the heart of the universe.” ~Deepak Chopra
Most people unconsciously judge others. It’s human nature, and it doesn’t make you a bad person–but it might make you feel like one. When you are focusing, consciously or otherwise, on the faults in other people, you’re going to be more likely to see them in yourself too. The best way to change this pattern is to begin intentionally finding something good in every single person you meet.
So, for every person in your life and every person you meet, find at least one thing about them that makes them special. And be free with the compliments. Even if you barely know a person, you can find SOMETHING to compliment them about–and not only will you make their day, you’ll walk away feeling good about yourself too. Remember, what you put out into the world is what comes back to you. So if you’re walking around finding good and beautiful things and sharing the love by freely passing out compliments? You’ll find that you’re attracting the same back to yourself–beauty, love, compliments–and ultimately, a renewed sense of self.
A successful person is one who can lay a firm foundation with the bricks that others throw at him or her. ~David Brinkley
I hope that these suggestions help you as you move into a new place of peace and self worth. Know that you are worthy, you are special and you are an amazing person. Even (and especially) when you feel at your lowest, try to change your perception and see the beauty and good things all around you. Be grateful for your life, for your SELF, and for all of the good things in your life.
I have been where you are, Kate, and I know the pain and despair that comes with feeling like you’re not good enough. Nearly every person alive has felt just like you feel now. The trick is to decide that you don’t WANT to feel that way any more, and to start taking action to change it. And then, Kate, you have to BELIEVE that you can have the life you want. Believe it and trust that its yours, and watch as your life begins to transform itself to match your true divine desires. Keep your eye on the prize, my friend, it can and will get better!
And to the rest of my readers, have you ever felt like Kate feels? What sort of advice would you offer to a friend in her situation? Let me know in the comments.