8 Signs Your Spouse is Cheating

8 Signs Your Spouse is Cheating

Do you think that your spouse is having an affair? Unfortunately, many times, it can be tough to tell if your spouse is cheating on you. Fortunately, many cheating spouses eventually show signs of being unfaithful, most of which are associated with their behavior. Outlined below are some signs that your spouse might be cheating on you.

What Behavior Changes Signal a Cheating Spouse?

They join a gym.

This is a major sign when it is something that they never had any interest in doing so before. If you never had a problem with your spouse’s weight before, why would you now? This could be a sign that they are trying to impress someone besides you.

You never sit down and talk anymore.

Did your spouse and talk about their day? If you never seem to have the intense conversations you once had, there may be a major problem. Cheating spouses often try to distance themselves from their relationships at home. This is a sign that your spouse may be cheating on you.

Sex is different.

Your spouse may act differently during sex and want to try new things out in the bedroom. If your spouse suddenly wants to try new things in the bedroom or if you notice that the sex is different, they may be cheating. In fact, you may be left wondering where they learned that from.

You have less sex.

In keeping with sex, your spouse may want to have it less. A decrease in sex frequency is a sign that your spouse may be cheating on you. As for why sex occurs less when cheating is involved, they feel guilty about what they are doing, or they may be getting enough sex already.

They get angry more often.

They may also get angry easier and more often. Your spouse may also be touchy around you. This may lead to more arguments and disagreements in your relationship. Things you do may annoy your husband or wife. They may actually go as far as to leave the room. Be sure to observe the changes in behavior that your spouse has towards other members of your family as well.

They start dressing differently.

They want to buy a whole new wardrobe, in a way, reinventing themselves. This works in conjunction with joining a gym to lose weight. A huge sign of cheating is when a new wardrobe is purchased, and more skin is shown.

They act weird about their phone.

Unusual behavior on the phone is another sign of cheating. When they talk on the phone near you, do they try to lower their voice or even leave the room? Hanging up a phone quickly is another signal to watch for. Be cautious of increased cell phone use, as many cheaters prefer to use their own personal phones instead of family phones.

Your friends start acting weird. 

In addition to examining the behavior of your husband or wife, you should also examine the behavior of your friends. The friends you share may start acting differently towards you. This is often because your shared friends might know more than you do. Even if a friend does not outright tell you that your husband or wife is cheating, they may intentionally or unintentionally show you the signs.

Are you worried your spouse is cheating on you?

While these signs may indicate that your spouse is cheating on you, there may also be reasonable causes for these behavior changes. For example, your spouse might want to look great for you and you alone, or they also may want to improve their health.

Even with the above-mentioned signs present, you should take additional steps. These steps can and should include monitoring cell phone calls, viewing the cell phone bill, or hiring a private investigator. Never confront your husband or wife without the proper proof. Be sure to get solid evidence of cheating. Otherwise, you could be creating a whole new problem in your relationship.

 

Secrets, Shyness and Self-Loathing: Identifying a Covert Narcissist

Secrets, Shyness and Self-Loathing: Identifying a Covert Narcissist

“Shyness has a strange element of narcissism, a belief that how we look, how we perform, is truly important to other people.” ~Andre Dubus III

identifying a covert narcissist

There are narcissists, and then there are people with narcissistic personality disorder (NPD). In both cases, it can be pretty simple to identify them – they all have pretty predictable and similar behaviors. 

That’s why online support groups for survivors of narcissistic relationships work so well. Because people can relate to one another so closely – they often comment that they feel like they’re reading their own stories when they support their fellow members.

Identifying a Covert Narcissist

Identifying a Narcissist is Simple, Right?  Okay, so you know how to identify a narcissist, and you know what to expect from them, right? But what happens when a narcissist is sort of “incognito” or behaving as an introvert, or a shy person? What does that look like? How can you tell the difference between a covert narcissist and an introvert?

Enter the Vulnerable Narcissist

She’s the damsel in eternal distress; or he’s the martyr of his oh-so-noble cause, quietly standing up for what he believes in and pretending he doesn’t want/need the praise that’s being heaped on him.

The shy or covert narcissist seems vulnerable and oversensitive. This can often manifest as hostility and defensiveness, and just like his overt/arrogant counterpart, the covert narcissist often:

  • feels a huge sense of (often unearned) entitlement
  • has grandiose fantasies about his or her life
  • will exploit others to get what they want
  • seeks power and control

How does a covert narcissist differ from an overt or grandiose narcissist? 

Unlike the overt or grandiose narcissist, the covert narcissist will not necessarily display narcissistic behavior that is immediately recognizable.

While he’ll have the standard grandiose fantasies for his life – all of which are sure to be unrealistic and self-centered, not to mention grandiose and inflated, he will believe that his dreams are unrealistic and unattainable.

He will even feel guilty for wanting what he wants, and somehow this inner conflict leads him to suppress his feelings as a whole.

This leads to the next inevitable step in which he turns his inner conflict into outer behavior, such as:

  • exhibitionist-type behavior
  • being overly competitive
  • being unacceptably aggressive when it comes to getting what he wants

Then, he’ll play the “poor me” game like a pro, and he often feels sorry for himself.

Why does the “vulnerable narcissist” play the “poor me” game so well? 

It all comes down to one thing: the covert narcissist hates himself. He thinks it’s going to be possible to hate himself BETTER, somehow.

Though he continues to demonstrate the behavior that he loathes, the covert narcissist is powerless to control his thoughts – and his deep inner conscience is NOT okay with the person he is or has become.

He judges HIMSELF more harshly than he judges anyone else, and usually, more harshly than he judges anyone else – but he certainly has what he considers a high standard for his life.

He quietly sticks to this unreasonable standard to the best of his abilities, happy to secretly look down his nose at the people he deems “lesser” than he.

Of course, when he falls off of his proverbial “standards” and behaves in any way that his inner critic deems bad or not desirable, he’s back to square one.

Covert Narcissism: Self-Hate Due to Distorted Self-Awareness

It all boils down to one thing: a covert narcissist understands on some level that his self-inflating ideas are, in fact, bullshit – at least on some level.

Read more: are you a narcissist? Find out for sure. 

So, though he continues to have his narcissistic thoughts and occasional external behavior, he’s holding himself to a very high standard and spends his life competing with the one person he can never beat (himself or some version of it).

At the same time, he is incapable of openly accepting blame or responsibility for anything that isn’t positive, and in fact he relates any such admission to weakness and “badness” of other people – which, most likely, is because of the angry kind of envy that psychologists say is involved in the creation of any narcissistic behavior.

The covert narcissist is often mistaken for an introvert or a shy person because to the untrained eye, they appear to be a pushover who is generally unassertive. They see themselves (and others see them) as victims or as people who aren’t able to obtain what they should have or deserve. People who don’t really know him may say things like, “oh, he’s just a big teddy bear!”

A covert narcissist will also:

  • call themselves a perfectionist and/or claim to be “a little OCD”
  • have outrageously adolescent daydreams about being a big famous something-or-other
  • have a somewhat questionable grip on reality, leading to personal guilt and self-hate.
  • have feelings of being worthless, countered by feelings of being different, separate, or “better” than other people

Get some additional insight into covert narcissism here.

What do you think? Have you ever met a covert narcissist? How could you tell? What characteristics do you think most clearly identify the covert narcissist? Share your thoughts and experiences in the comments section, below this video.

Read more: Take Back Your Life: 103 Highly-Effective Strategies to Snuff Out a Narcissist’s Gaslighting and Enjoy the Happy Life You Really Deserve

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Free, Easy Way to Get Energized and Lose Weight: Baby-Step Your Way to Sexy, Starting Right Now

Free, Easy Way to Get Energized and Lose Weight: Baby-Step Your Way to Sexy, Starting Right Now

Well, it’s official! The early edition of Project Blissful, the book, is available on Amazon.com in Kindle format. It’s opening to rave reviews so far, including this one published on Amazon.com

February 21, 2015 (Verified Purchase)
This book is right on. As a woman who has struggled with her weight and body image my entire life–there is more real life actionable tips in this book than ever. There lots of affirmations to keep your goals in sight and to stay the course.
 

Why should you listen to me? What makes me qualified to write this book? 

While I’m a certified life coach, I’m not a medical professional. But that’s not what makes me qualified to share this information, in my opinion. But what does is the fact that I have lost more than 100 pounds and kept if off.

Need proof? Here you go. That’s me, on the left in 2008, and sadly, I’d already lost about 15 pounds when this photo was taken. And that’s also me, on the right, on my way out for a friend’s birthday a few weeks ago. 

before and after angie1

Of course, my friends noticed. My family noticed. And everyone I knew on Facebook noticed – so you can imagine what I’m going to say next.

People have been asking me for awhile now – how’d you do it?

  • Did you have surgery?
  • Some crazy weight loss pills?
  • How did you lose more than 100 pounds?

How I Lost More Than 100 Pounds (And How You Can Too)

I get these questions all the time, and the answer to all of them is NO! I did it all without any of that stuff – and it didn’t cost me So, now that I’ve kept the weight off for more than three years, I am ready to share my message with everyone – and it’s my greatest hope that I can help at least one person find the motivation they need to begin to turn their life around.

That’s why I finally decided to put it all down in writing, in one place – and BlissFire Media is launching it as an e-book on Amazon.com’s Kindle to start the movement. projectblissfulwitharrowsAbout the Book

Project Blissful is a whole-life makeover that helps you become the best possible version of yourself. Author and certified life coach Angela Atkinson has herself lost more than 100 pounds without surgery or hard-core weight loss drugs. In this book, you’ll learn:

– How to start losing weight today (and without feeling miserable in the process)
– How to love yourself healthy and thin
– How to find your ideal weight and reach it without pain
– How to lose weight without traditional exercise
– How to baby-step your way through small habits that add up to big results 

What are you waiting for? Download it today and start changing your life, right now. 

Wanna know more? You will also learn about:

  • How to Define Your Personal Ideal State of Body Bliss
  • How to Get Your Sexy Back, Starting Today
  • All of My Sneaky Skinny Secrets – How to Look Thinner Immediately, Without Actually Losing Any Weight
  • How to Drop the Weight, Not Your Life – How You Can Keep Living Your Life (Or Start Living It Now) Even Before the Weight is Gone
  • The Tracking Game – Exactly what I did to make the weight start coming off and to keep it in check. 
  • Little-Known Secrets, Tried and True Tricks & Sneaky Shortcuts for Weight Loss
  • Tips on My Best Practices and Final Notes for Your Own Project Blissful
  • My Long-Term, Fail-Safe, Stay-on-Plan Weight Loss Motivation Tips
  • How I Developed Abs After 3 C-Sections and a 100-Pound Weight Gain

PLEASE, let me know what you think!

Because I genuinely want to be of service when I write my books, I value my readers’ opinions above all else.  That is why I’m really hoping some of you will read the book and tell me your thoughts. Even more, I hope it inspires those who could use it to take their fitness to the next level. 

I can’t wait to hear what you think of the book! 🙂 Don’t forget – you can get your copy right here. Don’t have a Kindle? No problem – just download the free Kindle app for your favorite device, right here. 

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