Success is Sexy: 7 Ways to Stop Limiting Yourself (Plus Free Wallpaper)

Success is Sexy: 7 Ways to Stop Limiting Yourself (Plus Free Wallpaper)

“Don’t limit yourself. Many people limit themselves to what they think they can do. You can go as far as your mind lets you. What you believe, remember, you can achieve.” ~Mary Kay Ash, founder Mary Kay Cosmetics

Click to download this free wallpaper! Or "right click, save link as."

Click to download this free wallpaper! Or “right click, save link as.”

A great life doesn’t happen by chance. It’s the result of having goals and skillfully allocating your resources in order to reach them. These resources include your thoughts, time, and energy.

Ultimately, a great life comes from taking the 24 hours you’re given each day and using them in a wise manner. This is more effective than just dealing with the next item on your endless lis of chores or reacting to what’s happening around you.

The key is in being proactive to create the life you desire.

Consider making these action tips a part of your daily routine:

  1. Get started. Avoid waiting for the perfect time or you’ll be waiting forever. It may be tempting to keep putting things off until you reach some milestone. But instead, take the first step to realizing your success and start now.
  2. Create an excess of everything valuable. A great life is largely the result of having more than you absolutely need. You can apply this concept to time, money, fun, space, energy, love, friends, and anything else that matters to you.
  • What if you saved 5 years of living expenses and had 3 days a week to do what you want?
  • Wouldn’t it be nice to have so many friends that you could easily find someone available for a night on the town?
  • Can you imagine making 5 times the amount of money you need to pay your bills and getting to enjoy your life?
  1. Simplify your life. Eliminate the things from your life that aren’t bringing you enjoyment or contributing to your success. Everything else is a distraction. By doing this, you free up the time and energy to focus on the important stuff.
  2. Prioritize. Give the most important items in your life the highest priority. Consider the people you know that seem to constantly struggle. You’ll likely see that their priorities aren’t leading them to success. If you focus on irrelevant things, your life doesn’t move in a positive direction.
  • If you accurately prioritize and allocate your resources accordingly, success will be just around the corner.
  • Choose the life you want. The only alternative is to rely on random luck.
  1. Remove the superfluous from your life. How many things in your life are physically and emotionally draining? Do everything you can to eliminate the distractions in your life and your energy level and productivity will soar
  2. Strive for excellence. Great lives come from great effort. Are you spending your time and money in the best way possible? Your best effort isn’t simply “trying really hard.” It’s also doing your best to figure out where to focus your energy. Be effective and efficient.
  3. Control your thinking. Taking charge of your thoughts is a huge priority. If you look at most of the previous tips, they’re about making it easier to control your thoughts.
  • Simplifying, having priorities, and removing distractions will all help you to control your thoughts. The more time you can spend focusing on your goals, finding solutions, and believing, the more successful you’ll become.

Success is the result of simplifying, focusing your resources, and controlling your thoughts. You already have everything you need to get started. The other things you require will be found along the way.

Start implementing these ideas today. They’re the backbone for creating a life you’ll love.

Open Your Mind, Open Your Life: Discover Abundance by Being Open to New Opportunities

Open Your Mind, Open Your Life: Discover Abundance by Being Open to New Opportunities

Blue butterflysmallAn important aspect of self-development is the ability to take advantage of every opportunity that presents itself. You might be wondering what opportunities you have. It’s nice to know that your life is full of unknown gems waiting to be discovered!

Try these methods to ensure you’re open to new opportunities:

  1. Recognize that you have opportunities all around you. The first step is to believe the current people, places, and situations you’re involved with may lead to something bigger.
  • If you engage in “limiting thinking,” it’s difficult for you to notice the opportunities around you. You’ll open yourself up to new things if you can broaden your thinking.
  1. Get acquainted with new people. Whenever you meet someone, get to know them. It’s good to have another business connection to network with or personal contact to develop a friendship with. These associations can blossom into opportunities you hadn’t considered.
  • Maybe your new colleague’s brother owns a business that you’d like to reach out to. Or a new neighbor does marathons and you’re interested in running.
  1. Discard the limiting thinking pattern. Many of us adopt a style of thinking like, “This is all I’ll ever have and I’ve got to make do with it.” How does this type of thinking affect your life and your ability to notice new opportunities?
  • When you limit your thoughts, you may be passing up fabulous love, career, and monetary riches.
  • Make a conscious decision to curb the limiting thinking. The next best thing might be just around the corner.
  1. Avoid running from challenging projects at work. You might be thinking, “There’s no way I want to get involved in this project.” Yet, those who take on those types of work tasks learn so much and are given even better opportunities in the future.
  • You can develop a reputation as the “go-to person” and advance your career.
  1. Voluntarily step in to fill voids. Maybe there’s something that needs to be done at work, but others balk at it. Perhaps they think the project sounds boring or that the task is monotonous.
  • For example, maybe no one wants to write the job descriptions for your department. Everyone thinks it sounds useless, but your boss wants it to be completed. Step up and get it done.
  • Another example might be that your neighborhood wants to turn a piece of land into a small park, but nobody is interested in making it happen. Take the lead and contact your city council to initiate the project.
  • When you step in to fill voids, others notice your efforts and you develop some new skills. Plus, some of these tasks can serve as resume builders.

Your life is filled with an unknown brilliance that you probably haven’t tapped into yet. Put these strategies into action today. Be ready and willing to notice and take advantage of all opportunities presented to you. A life filled with abundance is waiting for you!

Blissful Style Guide: The Right LBD for Your Budget

Blissful Style Guide: The Right LBD for Your Budget

lbdfromkmart“One is never over-dressed or underdressed with a Little Black Dress.” ~Karl Lagerfeld

Listen up, ladies. You need a little black dress in your wardrobe. I don’t care if you’re a factory worker who rarely has occasion to dress up–you never know when you’ll need to attend a special event, go on a date or even just dress up for the holidays or a fancy family get-together.

Did you know?

We are actively building our Blissful Style Guides resource section, so stay tuned for updates.

Click here to view more Blissful Style Guides

Blissful Style Guide: How to Find the Perfect Little Black Dress Within Your Budget

Here are a few tips I’ve learned along the way for finding the right little black dress to fit your budget.

Shop the sales: Since a little black dress is a timeless piece that can be easily dressed up or down for nearly any occasion, there’s nothing wrong with hitting clearance sales, especially through the online venues.

For example, I purchased the dress I’m wearing in the photo to the right at KMART.com from the Sofia Vergara collection and absolutely love it!

And it was on clearance. (Worth mentioning: since I got such a deal, i also picked up the same dress in an alternate, trendier orange color.) For the record, I also love NoMoreRack.com for stuff like this.

Need labels carefully: Listen, as the proud  owner of several “real” designer handbags, most of which were second-hand (and a few hand-me-downs), I totally feel you on the need to have “real” labels.

Sometimes, you need a label–but MOST times, a label is a luxury that may not be necessary.

For example, if you wanted to dress down your look with a shawl or scarf, you could consider one of these options based on your budget.

High-End* Option: Hermes Paris Broderie Hermes Stole

Hermès

Retail Price: $1,025.00

*Awesomely luxurious, but I can’t say I’d ever spend this much on a scarf, even if I was loaded–but I include it for people who can and will choose the higher-end options when they’re available.

 

 

Upper Echelon Option: Jill SanderStole in Cobalt

 

Retail Price: $448

(Current Sale Price: $315)

 

Mid-Range* Option: Faliero Sarti Oblong Scarf

Faliero Sarti Oblong Scarf - Scarves - Barneys.com

Retail Price: $235
*Slightly lower quality but worth the price for a one-season wear.

 

Best Bang for Your Buck*: Scialle Large Unito Royal Blue Scarf

Large UNITO Royal Blue ScarfRetail Price: $185
*NOTE: I consider this one the “best bang for your buck” because the quality matches even the Hermes scarf listed above, but the fact that the company’s not well-known yet means the label can’t drive up the price.
Woman Fashion Lady Cobalt Blue Long Crinkle Soft Chiffon Wrap Scarf Stole Shawl
Retail Price: $4.99
*I found this pretty chiffon wrap on eBay for less than $5 with free shipping. Only concern: quality is lacking.

 

How do you choose the right little black dress for your budget? Share your thoughts and experiences (and your relevant links!) in the comments section, below. 

 

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Open Your Mind, Open Your Life: Discover Abundance by Being Open to New Opportunities

How to Get a Good Night’s Sleep (And Why You Should)

By Michael Blauner–Personal Fitness Expert in Bergen County, New Jersey

sleepy

Experts say that you spend roughly one-third of your life sleeping. Certainly, you want to make every moment count toward the physical and mental rejuvenation that a good sleep provides! So, how can you enjoy a restful night of slumber?

Put these 8 tips into action now to experience some of the best sleep of your life:

Investigate your evening routine. Think about the activities you’re involved in from the time you walk in the door to the moment your head hits the pillow. The goal is to increase your awareness about what you’re doing and see if it could be interrupting your sleep.

  • Are you playing catch-up by bringing work home from the office? If so, your mind may be on overdrive and unable to turn off.
  • Do you find yourself consumed with doing household chores like laundry and house-cleaning? In that case, you’re probably lacking time for relaxation.

Plan to be in bed with the lights out for at least eight hours. Do you stay up until after midnight? Try to schedule evening activities early, so you can still get eight hours of sleep.

  • If you have trouble falling asleep, you might want to make it eight and a half hours.

Allow time to unwind. If you’re super busy, you’ll probably be rushing around until you finally collapse on the bed in hopes of getting a few winks.

  • Instead, give yourself at least an hour to shift gears and relax before bed. Everyone needs some downtime.

Clear your mind from the day’s chaos. Maybe it’s reading your kids a bedtime story or taking 20 minutes to meditate. Focus on shifting your thoughts from the intense to the trivial. A tranquil mind invites more sleep than a chaotic one.

Create an uncluttered, relaxing bedroom environment. Although you may think that a cluttered bedroom is benign, it may be preventing relaxation and interfering with your sleep. Besides, clutter draws dust, which can cause breathing difficulties during the night.

  • The first step is to put everything away. Clothes can go into drawers or the closet. Put junk mail and magazines into the recycling bin.
  • The second step is to organize what you have left. Place a lamp, reading materials, and your alarm clock on your night stand. Set the scene for a comfortable night’s slumber.
  • The third step is dusting. Use a damp cloth and clean all the surfaces in your bedroom each week to ensure an environment where you can breathe easily. If you spend just 15 minutes dusting and tidying your bedroom, you can prevent future clutter.

Turn off electronics at least one hour before bed. The light emanating from backlit screens like cell phones, tablets, and e-readers can trick your body into thinking it’s daylight and time to be awake. Plus, it’s best to rest your eyes from such gadgets before trying to sleep.

Take a warm bath rather than a shower. If you tend to struggle with sleep quality, it may be that your shower routine is invigorating you rather than relaxing you. Sitting for a few minutes in warm water can help your muscles relax and prepare for sleep.

Practice breathing in bed. Take deep breaths through your nose, hold them for five to eight seconds, and exhale slowly through your mouth. Do four of these breaths after you switch off the lights, and you’ll feel your body immediately relax.

Adopt these practices will help you create a restful bedtime routine. When you establish consistent relaxation habits, your body will become accustomed to them, and restful sleep will follow. Soon, you’ll be sawing logs with the best of them. Sweet dreams!

Open Your Mind, Open Your Life: Discover Abundance by Being Open to New Opportunities

Fix Your Finances: Ideas for Rebuilding Credit

“Remember that credit is money.” ~Benjamin Franklin

There are several ways that we can rebuild credit when you’ve had tough times. Financial abuse is real for narcissistic abuse victims! No one should judge you. But if you are tired of collectors hounding you, or if you are frustrated that no one will loan you money because you never had credit, it is time to learn how to build your credit. First, and foremost, never purchase items you do not need. If you ‘want’, do not let your wants wear you down and get you deeper in debt. If you are searching to build credit and have no history at all, make sure you have your priorities in order.

Bad Credit? Tips for Building Credit

So, you got yourself in a little trouble. Whatever the reason your credit’s bad, I’m not judging you. We’ve all been there–but we are here to fix this problem, not talk about how terrible it is, so let’s do this.

What are my rights when it comes to credit scores?

Your rights, as they apply to your credit and according to the FTC, are as follows.

  • You’re entitled to a free credit report if a company takes “adverse action” against you, like denying your application for credit, insurance, or employment.
  • You have to ask for your report within 60 days of receiving notice of the action. The notice includes the name, address, and phone number of the consumer reporting company.
  • You’re also entitled to one free report a year if you’re unemployed and plan to look for a job within 60 days; if you’re on welfare; or if your report is inaccurate because of fraud, including identity theft.
  • Each of the nationwide credit reporting companies — Equifax, Experian, and TransUnion — is required to provide you with a free copy of your credit report once every 12 months, if you ask for it. To order, visit annualcreditreport.com, or call 1-877-322-8228. You may order reports from each of the three credit reporting companies at the same time, or you can stagger your requests throughout the year.
  • It doesn’t cost anything to dispute mistakes or outdated items on your credit report. Both the credit reporting company and the information provider (the person, company, or organization that provides information about you to a credit reporting company) are responsible for correcting inaccurate or incomplete information in your report.
  • To take advantage of all your rights, contact both the credit reporting company and the information provider.

The Ups and Downs of your Credit Rating

More Tips for Bad Credit Repair After Narcissistic Abuse

  • There are systematic guides at your local library that will teach you, as a debtor, how to write letters to creditors.
  • Don’t be afraid to call a creditor and explain your situation. Even if you have ignored their calls for months, they will work with you in most cases. Communication will make you feel better and will help your creditor to understand your situation. While it may not immediately solve your credit problems, it is definitely a step on the road to recovery.
  • Any documents that pertain to your credit history should be stored in a safe area. If you send letters to your creditors keep a copy of each letter sent and store it in a safe area.
  • If you notice any errors on your bills or credit, reports make sure that you contact the appropriate professionals and dispute the charges immediately. Once you have disputed the charges with the sources you will then contact your card provider and let them know what occurred.
  • If you are lucky enough to have a credit card with bad credit, please don’t use the card to repay your debts and then meet the monthly installments on the credit card each month. That would mean getting out of debt while going in debt deeper–how sensible is that? It might seem like the only solution when all else false, but credit cards have interest rates so the bills each month on the card will increase.

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