Are you self-aware? After you’ve been through narcissistic abuse, you might not be as self-aware as you think.
The definition of self-awareness is having a high degree of knowledge about yourself. It’s awareness of your habits, emotional tendencies, needs, desires, strengths, and weaknesses.
Having a high level of self-awareness is a powerful tool. It allows you to change your life more effectively, since you know how you tick.
People who lack self-awareness find life to be frustrating, quite often – so right now, that might include you – and it most definitely includes a lot of narcissists, believe it or not. I know that sounds confusing, but stick with me.
1. Notice your thoughts. Unless you’ve been meditating for years, your mind is constantly churning through ideas and endlessly providing commentary. You can’t just look at a tree and admire it, your mind has to comment, “That’s a beautiful tree.”
Notice your thinking patterns.
What are you thinking when you’re feeling nervous?
Walking down the street?
Notice that similar situations result in similar thought patterns.
Do you judge people and situations?
Do you spend a lot of time thinking about the past or the future?
Do you expect the worst to happen or the best? Or do you adopt an attitude of, “Let’s just see what happens” instead?
2. Notice your feelings.
What are you feeling throughout the day?
What do you feel while you’re eating?
Driving to work?
Lying in bed?
Waiting in line?
Once you’ve notice your emotion, question it.
What am I feeling? Why?
What do I need right now?
How do I normally react in this situation?
Is that smart?
3. Understand how you deal with frustration or emotional discomfort. A huge chunk of your time is spent trying to make yourself feel better. If you feel slightly frustrated or uncomfortable, then you may spend a tremendous amount of time and energy trying to change the situation or the others around you to resolve those negative feelings.
Do you try to control others?
Do you attempt to distract yourself?
Is your first instinct to leave the situation?
Do you surf the internet or eat a big bowl of ice cream?
4. Examine your friendships.
Where do you find your friends?
Are most of your friendships long-term or short?
When your friendships end, what is the common cause?
What types of people do you prefer to be friends with?
What types of people do you avoid?
5. Examine your intimate relationships.
Do you see a pattern in the type of people that you’ve been involved with?
What are the negative characteristics they all share?
Why do you think those people appealed to you?
What were your shortcomings in your relationships?
Are you clingy? Jealous? Too focused on work?
Failed to communicate your needs?
Think about how you contributed to the failure of your relationships. Have you changed your approach from relationship to relationship, or do you continue to repeat your mistakes?
6. Keep a journal. There’s no better way to learn about yourself than to record your thoughts, feelings, and experiences each day. Studies have shown that we don’t remember our past very accurately, so record it while it’s still fresh in your mind. Be sure to include your high and low points for the day. Note how well you ate and slept, too. You might find some useful information. * Create a habit of writing in your journal for at least 15 minutes each day. You’ll start to notice patterns and learn a lot about yourself. Understanding yourself might be the most important piece of your self-development puzzle. If you don’t understand yourself, it’s difficult to apply all the great information available today. Maintain an awareness of your thoughts, feelings, and actions. Examine and question them. You’ll be surprised by what you find.
Happy Holidays to all of my QueenBeeing readers and subscribers! I know how crazy this time of year can be for those of us who have to keep an eye on our figures, so I put together a little something for you, with the help of my friend and fitness expert Jamie Paretti! (more…)
Day 1 – Make More Money Clear away blocks to having plenty of money (Each day includes two powerful recordings.)
Day 2 – Sharpen Your Memory Vaporize uncertainty and forgetfulness
Day 3 – Attract What You Want Turn the Law of Attraction toward your success
Day 4 – Be Free of Anxiety Be fearless, strong, and successful
Day 5 – Kick-up Your Instincts Use your intuition like a psychic
Day 6 – Improve Your Health Reduce stress and eradicate sickness
Bonus – Get to Your Ideal Weight Use your inner mind to drop those pounds
These six days can have a massive impact on what you get out of life, and it will cost you nothing. No strings. No obligation. You will have two new programs every day that you can stream from your computer or mobile device. It’s our gift to you and your friends. All you have to do is get your Free Pass today.
“Acknowledging the good that you already have in your life is the foundation for all abundance.” ~Eckhart Tolle
Going through narcissistic abuse leaves you feeling mentally, physically, and otherwise unwell. If you’re going through it now, you might notice that you’ve been feeling a little off lately. Maybe you’re getting all sorts of colds or you can’t seem to stop getting those chin pimples. Or maybe it’s something in your head making you feel bad – like going through narcissistic abuse – and even narcissistic abuse recovery.
See. the side-effects of the C-PTSD (complex post-traumatic stress disorder) suffered by many survivors of narcissistic abuse are difficult and often painful. I’ve got great news for you – the answer to your health problems could be as simple as feeling thankful more often. No seriously!
Feeling grateful can actually improve your health.
The study found that being thankful helped improve the health of heart disease patients. Even better, according to researchers, this discovery has much wider implications, and they say it can help anyone. So, you don’t have to be a heart disease patient to benefit from showing gratitude to others.
How to Use Gratitude Practices to Get Healthy Faster in Narcissistic Abuse Recvoery
Try these strategies to use gratitude to benefit your health:
Understand what it feels like to be grateful and do it often.
Being thankful is an important part of staying healthy.
Do you show your gratitude when it matters?
Do the people in your life feel you appreciate them? Have you told them how much you enjoy the things they do?
Being grateful may require a conscious effort. It’s important to start noticing your thought processes and how you react to various situations.
How can you show gratitude to your loved ones?
The people who are closest to you need to know you appreciate them.
You can begin to show gratitude by thanking them for a specific action.
You can also show your thoughtfulness by doing small things for them and making their lives easier.
Sharing your time is important. Offer to do something your loved ones may enjoy. This will show you care and pay attention to their lives. It also shows you want to help.
Everyone loves compliments, so give them out frequently with love.
How can you show gratitude to your coworkers?
They spend hours with you and need to know you appreciate them.
Send thank-you notes to your coworkers to show them you care.
Show your gratitude by bringing them lunch or offering to buy it for them.
Sometimes just listening to your coworkers can be a good way to show your gratitude.
Bring flowers to work to brighten your coworkers’ day.
How can you show gratitude to strangers?
You may not know their name or life story, but the strangers you meet throughout the day can also benefit from gratitude.
Does the person who makes your coffee stand next to a tip jar? You can make a generous tip and help brighten their day. You can also point out something they have done well.
You don’t have to know your servers’ names to be grateful. You can thank them, compliment them, and share something positive.
How can you show gratitude for yourself?
Last but certainly not least, you’ve got to think about yourself too! Take a minute and notice the wonderful things that are happening in your life and be thankful for them each day.
Sometimes making a simple list of all the positive and good things in your life can start you on the path to gratitude.
Remember to give yourself compliments, too, ya hottie. 😉
Thinking about the positive things you have done for others can help you see how you impact the world.
Gratitude is an important part of life, and showing it to others can help strengthen your health. It’s crucial to note the positive things occurring every day. There are many ways to be thankful, so you can share the joy (and health benefits) with the people you care about.
Get help with narcissistic abuse recovery right now.
The QueenBeeing SPANily, Official – We consider this the best narcissistic abuse recovery support group on the web. It offers several subgroups and features a vigilant, compassionate admin team full of trained coaches and survivors, supporting more than 12k members. SPAN is an acronym created by Angie Atkinson that stands for Support for People Affected by Narcissistic abuse in toxic relationships.
Other Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Support Groups– We also have separate groups for each stage in your narcissistic abuse recovery and some for those who have moved past recovery and are evolving into the next stage of their own life. Survivors have unique and individual needs, even when they’ve moved on – so we’re still here for you.
One-on-One Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Coaching – If you prefer to get more personalized support in your recovery, you might like to schedule a session with one of our coaches to plan and execute your own narcissistic abuse recovery plan.
Find a Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Therapist – If you’re looking for a therapist for narcissistic abuse recovery, either because you cannot afford coaching and want to use your health insurance or because you have additional issues you need to address that do not fall within the realm of coaching, you will want to find the right therapist for you – and as far as we’re concerned, that therapist must understand what you’ve been through. This page offers assistance to help you do exactly that.
“You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection.” ~Buddha
I’m going to ask you a simple question and I want you to be very, very honest with yourself when you consider your answer.
How have you been treating yourself lately? I mean, seriously – have you been taking good care of your body, your mind, your soul? This is really important.
See, while it doesn’t always seem that important to do the little things for yourself, how you take care of yourself is critical to your quality of life. And when I say critical, I mean, it can drastically affect the way you experience the world – like night and day.
Your own level of self-respect is indicative of how you view yourself. And, obviously, showing self-respect keeps your positive feelings about you flowing and growing. Positive feelings are the catalyst to a better life, if you use them to your benefit and focus on growing them.
Feeling good about yourself and demonstrating self-respect are kind of a “chicken and egg” situation: it can be difficult to tell which comes first. Do positive emotions and thoughts about yourself lead to self-respect or is it the other way around? Your experience will tell you which of these feels most true to you.
But in my experience, the positive emotions can definitely lead to the actual experience – that’s your basic manifesting stuff.
7 simply effective ways to respect yourself more
Follow these tips to help you increase your self-respect:
1. Consider your own feelings. Your emotions are at least as important as everyone else’s. So, if you’re uncomfortable, act on that information. Take your own feelings into account in your everyday life and the decisions you make.
2. Avoid making self-deprecating comments. Such remarks are often used as humor, which can build rapport between people. However, if you’re uncertain about whether you treat yourself with the respect you deserve, avoid making them until you’re more sure of yourself. What you say about yourself over and over becomes what you believe.
3. Take care of your emotional needs. Self-respect is apparent through the things you do to make yourself comfortable, content, and happy. If a relationship constantly makes you feel emotionally upset or out of balance, perhaps it’s time to do something about it. You are the only person you can be absolutely sure will be there to take care of yourself emotionally.
4. Acknowledge to yourself that you deserve respectful treatment. This is as simple as it gets: because you’re a human being, you deserve to be treated with fundamental human courtesies, including respect. Recognize your own value.
5. Avoid allowing anyone to treat you disrespectfully. Be clear that you expect to be treated with kindness and care, whether you’re interacting with a co-worker, partner, or your child.
* Sometimes, you might think you’re giving someone a break by not insisting on being treated well. However, when you allow others to treat you poorly, you’re slacking on your own self-care and enabling them to practice negative interpersonal habits as well.
6. Behave in ways that show you care. How you conduct yourself sends a strong message to the world.
* Taking care of your body, watching the language you use, and refraining from engaging in socially unacceptable behaviors (such as eating or drinking too much, losing your temper, and speaking inappropriately) show that you have a certain measure of respect for yourself.
* Think of someone you admire and respect. What is it about the person that earns your respect? Strive to emulate this person. You’ll be amazed how your self-respect will grow.
7. Treat others with respect. In order to treat others with respect, you need to have a clear idea about how to act in respectful ways. Then, you can turn those same responses toward yourself. Make showing respect a way of life.