Don’t Be a B: Stop THIS and Support Your Fellow Females

Don’t Be a B: Stop THIS and Support Your Fellow Females

I generally work really hard to stay positive. But I’m human, and I’ll admit it – a few months ago, I had a minor rant about a dumb blonde joke a woman posted in one of my Facebook groups (which is for people who’ve dealt with narcissistic abuse in toxic relationships). don't be a bitch

So, whatever – I got some writing inspiration out of the deal. I moved on.

But now, I’ve just about had it with women and their hatefulness toward one another.

Enter exhibit A.

listen up bitches

I’m sorry. But are you effing kidding me?

This photo implies that:

The blonde is stupid. And must have perfect vision. And that she can’t be a “nerd” – AKA, smart person. Oh, and it completely invalidates her and anyone who looks lie her.

You wanna talk about stereotypes and being judged on the way you look?

Everyone gets it in one way or another.

Yeah, I know, I’m being too sensitive – but I’m also the mother of a little girl who is blonde-ish and who needs to wear glasses…I don’t want this self-hating business to grow and fester while she grows up – I want to help resolve it or reduce it so that we, as women, can expect a better future for our daughters, the way our foremothers did for us. So I had to put my little reminder in there. And, I don’t know, maybe she just didn’t see it – but the original poster didn’t respond.

Here’s the thing, ladies.

We have enough to deal with as women and stupid, sexist stereotypes that men tend to throw at us – whether they’re involving our intelligence or mental health (or lack thereof) or our sexual ethics (again, or lack thereof) or our personal style choices – men have some stuff to say about us.

You feel me? So, when we do things like post sexist memes and act like we are sooo amused by these stereotypes, we are perpetuating another one: the self-hating woman. Or is it the “jealous hater” one? Or the “I’m so much better than you because I don’t care about my appearance at all” one?

In any case, I’ll tell you this much: it’s mean and it’s hurtful.

Whether you like it or not, everyone’s got feelings, and everyone deserves to have theirs respected. If random women are posting this kind of garbage in Facebook groups, we’ve got a problem.

Would you expect a a minister to post stuff that disproved religion? Or a gays rights leader to post negative jokes about gay people on his Facebook page?

Would a psychologist post material on how psychology doesn’t work? Would a doctor post links to articles about why you should never trust someone who practices Western Medicine?

Of course not. THAT would be crazy, right?

So, how about we all quit being b*tches?

One of the best ways we can support a better future is to support our fellow females, live givers, lifesavers – and to stop being hateful, spiteful, jealous, and catty to one another. Get over the mean girls stuff already and move on. It’s 2016, for kiwi’s sake.

Can I get an amen? Ha.

But seriously, let’s talk about it.

Okay, so tell me this: why is it okay for you, women, to tear other women down?

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: stand up, ladies, and support your fellow females. Stop aiding and abetting these sexist jerks who are still trying to hold that damn glass ceiling in place and let’s climb the collective ladder with our collective hammers in hand.

If we stick together, our abilities are limitless. But when we tear each other down, we are lost – we might as well just be “on our own” out there. Tearing down other women, believe it or not, will lead to your own personal sort of “tearing down,” because by the law of attraction, you are getting exactly what you’re putting out there. So what do you wanna get back? 

Me? I choose love.

What do you think? Should women stop being such b*tches to one another and start supporting each other? If we don’t stand up for one another, who will stand up for us?

Lose the flab, keep the self-worth: Required tweaks for the ‘dream dress’ method

Lose the flab, keep the self-worth: Required tweaks for the ‘dream dress’ method

As 2014 comes crashing to a close, a lot of us are googling our asses off, hoping for some new breakthrough in the weight loss world,but every year, we pretty much discover the same thing: if we want to drop the pounds, we’ve got to move more and eat less.

Enter the “dream dress” method of weight loss, in which you purchase a beautiful dress or other outfit that you just LOVE and cannot wait to wear. The catch? You buy it in the size you WANT to be, not the size you are now.

No matter if you’re currently sporting a 22 and looking to squeeze into a 2. 

I’m sure you’re not surprised that I have a small problem with this one, because I think that if you can’t really love yourself as you are, right now, you’ll never find real happiness anyway.

But inspration can be good for weight loss. It can literally mean the difference between success and failure.

And there’s nothing wrong with a little inspiration, obviously which is likely why so many fit pros are suggesting that we buy a “dream dress” or an outfit that is the ideal size for us.

The Dream Dress Method: How it can work in the real world for real women

Now, I can see how this could work. It HAS worked for me personally in the form of “dream jeans,” actually.

But when it did work, it was literally when. I bought a pair of jeans that was only one or two (when I was sort of “between” sizes). That’s because:

A. If you can’t even get it over your big toe, it’s going to feel like a goal you can’t meet.

B. Fashion changes so quickly. If you’re serious about wearing it this season, best to choose something that’ll only take a few pounds to fit.

C. This allows you to go out an get another little bit of inspiration when you fit into the current one. It offers an instant reward that becomes motivation for the next weight loss goal.

So, how about you? Have you ever bought a “dream dress” and if so, did you ever manage to fit into it? Share your thoughts in the comments below or join in the discussion on our Facebook page.

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