Don’t Go It Alone! 5 Ways to Win at Narcissistic Abuse Recovery

Don’t Go It Alone! 5 Ways to Win at Narcissistic Abuse Recovery

Have you figured out you’ve been dealing with a narcissist in your life, but you don’t know where to begin your recovery? If so, you’re not alone. In fact, it reminds me of an old story about a child trying to move a heavy stone while his father looks on. The child works and works, but is just not strong enough. Finally, he tells his father, “I can’t do it. It’s impossible.”

His father responds, “Of course you can. You haven’t used all the strength you have available to you yet.” The little boy answers that he has tried his hardest, and still can’t do it, to which the father responds, “You haven’t asked me to help you yet.”

If you need help in your own healing and you don’t know who to ask, look no further – here’s some support and help that’s available to you right now.

Here’s the Help You Need in Narcissistic Abuse Recovery

Sometimes, when you’re trying to recover from narcissistic abuse, it can feel like you’re moving that heavy rock. You struggle and fight, but it’s so hard to stick to the plan that you give up. There comes a time to recognize that asking for help is a sign of strength, not weakness. Enlisting the aid of friends, family, and a good support group can bolster your efforts and help you overcome setbacks that threaten to derail your narcissistic abuse recovery efforts. Instead of trying to go it alone, try a few of these suggestions to help you stay on track with the help of friends and family. If you prefer a guided experience, you can start your narcissistic abuse recovery for free, right here. 

Get a support system

Gather up trusted friends and family members and make them part of your inner circle – your support system. Don’t have people you feel comfortable sharing your situation with? How about a whole group of people who have been there, done that? Join my SPAN group, right here. It’s totally free and confidential. We also have several other groups that are specific to your situation and your level in recovery – check them out here. 

Get your family on the right page.

When they’re not narcissistic, husbands, wives, children, and siblings can offer support in unexpected ways. Something as simple as a sincere compliment at the right time can be all you need to nudge you onward. By the same token, refuse to let them sabotage your recovery efforts. Sometimes even people who are acting as the flying monkeys of a toxic narcissist don’t know what they’re doing. Give yourself the freedom and space you need to clarify the situation – and don’t be afraid to take a step back from people who are toxic for you, especially during recovery.

Join our small group coaching sessions.

There’s a lot to be said for seeking out the support of others who are fighting the same battle you are. Whatever it is that motivates you, you can find it in our small group coaching sessions led by the amazing Lise Colucci – and you’ll get one-on-one help as well as being able to connect with and learn from your fellow group members during our sessions. Healthy sharing, companionship, encouragement, applause, and practical, common-sense advice from others who are also fighting to take back your life can all make this whole narcissistic abuse recovery stuff a whole lot easier.

Learn all you can about the topics of narcissism and narcissistic abuse recovery.

Read up on narcissistic abuse recovery, watch my narcissistic abuse recovery YouTube videos, or, if you’re pressed for time (or struggle with ADHD) check out my Tiktok videos for shorter, bite-sized narcissistic abuse recovery help – or visit http://booksangiewrote.com to pick up my books – all less than $5.

Get one-on-one narcissistic abuse recovery coaching, counseling, or therapy.

sign up right here to get one-on-one personalized coaching and counseling for narcissistic abuse recovery with one of our certified narcissistic abuse recovery coaches and counselors. If you prefer a therapist, check out our page on finding the best therapist for your narcissistic abuse recovery needs. 

Other Helpful Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Resouces

How to Reclaim Your Feminine Power After Toxic Relationships

How to Reclaim Your Feminine Power After Toxic Relationships

Are you feeling like life after a toxic relationship has noting to offer?

  • Are you bored and feeling kinda ugly and unapproachable lately?
  • Are you tired of feeling unattractive?

Do you wanna bring out your inner goddess? Do you want to bring your sexy back, or to find it for the first time?

Good news – I’m a total nerd who loves to study the science behind human psychology, including attraction and how it works. That’s why I’m always paying attention and asking questions.

Today, I’m sharing something that answers the question every woman wants answered, but few are brave enough to really ask.

And many women have a different idea of what men consider hot. That’ why I asked my focus group of about 150 people what they think makes a woman hot.

Just as some similarities in perceptions showed through, there were some very marked differences between men and women on what they think makes a women hot. I’ll explain all that for you – and more – in this video. 

Did someone accuse YOU of being a narcissist? How to tell for sure

Did someone accuse YOU of being a narcissist? How to tell for sure

Did someone accuse you of being self-centered or thoughtless when it comes to other people’s feelings? Has someone gone so far as to actually call you a narcissist or even just a toxic person?

If so, did you consider the possibility that it might be the truth?

Could you really be a narcissist?

Now before you get your defenses all up and stop reading, let me preface the following bit of advice with a brief disclaimer. I realize that every single one of us is narcissistic on some level and to our own benefit in some ways. It’s a healthy amount, or close to it anyway, in many cases.

This is not the kind of narcissism I’m talking about here. I’m talking about the toxic kind of narcissism, the kind that consumes you and everyone you are directly connected with on different levels.

The people in your personal life, especially your spouse, kids, siblings – anyone you live with is most deeply affected by your narcissistic ways. And those you work most closely with, especially if they’re your subordinates, can also be seriously affected.

Find out how a narcissist affects the people in his/her life.

Are you the victim of a narcissistic person?

It’s possible that you are actually the victim of a narcissist who has been gaslighted into believing that you’re the narcissist. So let me ask you: Do you experience gaslighting and manipulation from someone you’re close to, maybe even love? And you feel like you might be going crazy? I’ve been there and I can help you.

Can you relate to the signs that you’re a victim of narcissistic abuse described in this video?

10 Signs You Might Be a Narcissist

So how do you know if you’re really a narcissist? Start here. Check out these 10 signs you might be a narcissist. If you resonate with most or all of them, you might be a narcissist. If you find out that you are, you’ve already taken the first step toward narcissistic recovery. Admission of a problem is the first requirement to fix it.

You’ll often hear people say in the narcissistic abuse community that if you think you’re a narcissist, you’re probably not one. And on some level, that can be true since narcissists tend to project and deflect their own behaviors onto their victims. But it isn’t exactly that simple. Here are 10 signs that you might be dealing with a touch of narcissistic personality disorder or malignant narcissism.

1. You’ve been accused of making everything all about you. 

Perhaps more than once, someone in your life has accused you of failing to care about anyone but yourself. You probably blew it off at the time, but take a moment now and reconsider what the person said. Go ahead. I’ll wait. Could there be any validity to the idea that your primary focus is…well, yourself?

2. You are rarely wrong. At least as far as you’re concerned.

Even though you’re sure that you are right 99 percent of the time, the people around you can’t seem to see it that way. That, or you’ve already got them well-trained and they know better than to cross you. And you’d be hard-pressed to spend any significant amount of time around people who can’t see things your way.

3. You feel the need to be in control of everything. All the time.

It’s not that you need another responsibility on your plate, it’s just that no one else can seem to get it right. You worry that if you can’t keep your finger on everything, it’ll all be screwed up. So you spend a lot of time trying to manage all of the incompetent people in your life.

4. You know a lot of weak-minded people.

You might even have a secret nickname for them, like zombies or sheep. You think that most people aren’t quite as good or smart or organized or whatever as you – and you are often irritated or amused by their inferiority.

5. You’re different at home than you are in public. There is more than one version of yourself.

You don’t show your true self to the world. You’ve got an image to maintain, after all. Your family and closest friends are the only ones who’ve seen your “ugly side” and you wouldn’t have it any other way. In public, you project the perfect image because that is what you need people to see. You’ve got to impress everyone you meet – and when someone isn’t immediately smitten with you, you’re immediately suspicious of them, especially if they’re friendly with anyone you consider “yours.”

6. Your friends don’t like each other.

For some reason, you’re not a big friend-sharer. While you might have two or three friends in the same group, none are especially close. You prefer one on one when it comes to close relationships. And your favorite kind of person is an excellent listener who thinks you’re amazing and perfect and who would do anything to make you happy. Otherwise, you love a big party where you get to be the center of attention.

7. You get bored when people talk about themselves or anything that doesn’t directly concern you.

You can’t understand why everyone is always blathering on about such boring things as their own thoughts and dreams and passions. And forget about hearing anything regarding mind-numbing topics like the mundane jobs they do, their lame love lives, or their silly problems. You can’t take it – you just glaze over.

8. You wait for your turn to talk in a conversation – at least sometimes.

You’re not known for your great listening skills for some reason. During a conversation, you find yourself nearly bursting at the seams to share your opinion or a story about you that relates to the topic at hand. You really wish people would just give you the floor, already. So rather than pay attention to what’s being said, you just bide your time and wait for a moment where you can interject.

9. You’re either the life of the party or you’re outta there.

Most of the time, you’re the host with the most. People love you and you are generally on fire when it comes to your social life. But on the rare occasions where you have an “off-day” and someone else grabs the center of attention, you’d rather just leave. Why would anyone pay attention to THAT person when they’ve got access to someone like YOU?

10. You’re sort of a hero. Or someone’s idol. Or at least very, very smart.

You sort of hate to admit it, but a lot of people consider you a sort of hero, or at least they would if they knew how amazing you really are. You’re the sort of person who has always had potential. Now if you could just get everyone else to see what you’ve secretly known all along: you’re something special and unique in comparison to most common humans.

Now, these are only 10 of the many, many signs that you’re a narcissist. If any of these things feel familiar to you, I invite you to check out the following articles and resources to further determine your level of narcissism.

How to Know Someone is a Narcissist

28 Warning Signs Someone is a Narcissist (See or hear on YouTube)

Get help with narcissistic abuse recovery, right now.

Related articles

Take the Narcissism Test Here

Still not sure? Take this narcissism self-assessment test to gain a clearer insight into your situation.

Narcissism in Relationships: How to Deal When a Toxic Relationship Damages Your Self-Esteem

Narcissism in Relationships: How to Deal When a Toxic Relationship Damages Your Self-Esteem

“Narcissistic love is riding on the rollercoaster of disaster filled with a heart full of tears.” ~Sheree Griffin

How to Deal When a Narcissist Mentally Beats You Down

Insecurity sucks. And for a narcissist, it’s a secret that most people aren’t even aware 0f – but while the narcissist has the ability to appear completely together, in reality, he’s a big ball of insecurity and self-hate.  (more…)

Pin It on Pinterest