“Feeling confident – or pretending that you feel confident – is necessary to reach for opportunities. It’s a cliché, but opportunities are rarely offered; they’re seized.” ~Sheryl Sandberg
It could happen to anyone. We have a dream – maybe we even plan our whole lives. And then stuff happens. Life happens, and sometimes we find ourselves stuck in some dead-end job we don’t love, wishing we could be doing whatever it is that we REALLY want to do.
I know, because it happened to me.
Regardless of your life decisions, deciding on a career can sometimes be difficult. After spending a few years studying in a particular field, one would think that your career choice is obvious. Sometimes, though, uncertainty looms because you aren’t fully connected to the field.
Have you chosen a certain career direction because your parents want you to do it? Keep in mind that your ideal career should be something that still gives you joy ten years down the line.
Unsure About Your Career Choice?3 Ways to Know You’re on the Right Track
Use this guide to figure out if you’re on the right career path:
You have an innate skill set.Some individuals are just more naturally aligned with certain careers than others. Is that the case with you and your career choice?
Think back to your childhood. Is your work related to something that you had a knack for growing up? Did related activities interest you? If yes, you’re probably on the right track.
How easy is it for you to understand the field’s complex concepts? If you find yourself breezing through things that others find difficult, you likely have the natural ability for it.
Do you feel “at home” finding solutions to challenges in your field? If so, it likely means that you’re doing what you’re meant to be doing.
Your eyes light up when working.On the flip side of having natural abilities is the concept of being passionate. You’re probably good at many things, but which ones are you passionate about?
If your eyes light up, it represents excitement about doing something that aligns with your soul. You can put it right up there with sharing special moments with beloved family members.
Are there times when hours pass by without you even realizing it? Being so engrossed in your work that very little else matters usually means that you love what you’re doing!
Once you find yourself talking about your career to family, friends, and even strangers, you’re likely in the career of your dreams! Is your career constantly on the forefront of your mind?
Your earning power is irrelevant.Careers that cater to the passionate side are usually fulfilling all on their own.There’s a pride you get from producing something good, regardless of what your paycheck looks like.
When you’re doing something you love, you spend your time ensuring you do it well. The financial benefit that comes along with work is important, but it’s definitely secondary to doing something you love!
Have you ever found that bonuses on the job feel less exciting to you than to your co-workers? It’s probably because the income plays second fiddle in your life.
Strangely enough, working in a fulfilling career negates the desire to seek material fulfillment elsewhere. You may even find that your earnings pile up because you really don’t have the desire to spend it!
The formula for assessing career suitability is really easy. For the most part, it just requires a little introspection. Give thought to what matters most to you. If, after defining those things, your career comes out on top, you’re on the right track.
Take the time to listen to your heart as you choose your life’s work.Be thoughtful when it comes to determining your ideal career path.
Need a little more help getting on track? I’ve got a free gift for you this weekend only! Check it out below.
If you feel so inclined, I’d love it if you’d consider leaving me a review on Amazon.com, but that’s not a requirement. You can just download the book and read it and move on with your (definitely better after reading it) life! 😉
“To keep the fire burning brightly there’s one easy rule: Keep the two logs together, near enough to keep each other warm and far enough apart – about a finger’s breadth – for breathing room. Good fire, good marriage, same rule.” ~Marnie Reed Crowell
Unfortunately, there aren’t many classes in high school or college that teach us how to be successful in long-term relationships and divorce is common. That’s regrettable, because a fulfilling relationship can contribute so much toward enjoying a happy and successful life.
There are many things you can do to strengthen your marriage and help make it last until death do you part. If you want to have the best chance of marital success, it’s a wise idea to learn some of these strategies.
The following tips are compiled from data gathered from researchers and are designed to strengthen and heat up marriages and make them last! (Please note: they should only be applied if you’re in a healthy relationship! If not, you can start fixing things right here.)
Have realistic expectations. It’s easy to make it through the early stages of a relationship when everything is new and exciting. But those annoying little habits aren’t quite as cute and endearing ten years into the future. A relationship requires work and energy to grow and thrive.
Become good at saying “I’m sorry.” Despite your best efforts, you’ll make mistakes in your marriage. Studies have shown that the people slowest to apologize are the ones most likely to stay single or get divorced.
Sometimes you have to decide if you’d rather be correct or happy. Be strong enough to say you’re sorry and move on.
It’s okay to argue in a respectful way. The presence of arguing in a relationship doesn’t affect its success as much as how a couple argues. One psychologist claims a 95% success rate for predicting which relationships would fail just by listening to an argument for five minutes!
The four factors that make all the difference when you argue are: contempt, defensiveness, criticism, and withdrawing. Avoid these behaviors and your marriage is more likely to survive.
Laugh together. Remember the good times you’ve shared. Talk about and relive them. Reminiscing about fun times helps keep couples together.
Consider creating some happy, new memories and remind your partner about the great times you’ve already enjoyed. Laughing together strengthens your marriage!
You need five good times for each bad one.Research has shown that marriages require at least five positive interactions for each negative one. What is a good interaction? A fun afternoon, a positive conversation, or a good hug. You know what a negative interaction is.
You can complain, but avoid criticizing. If your partner’s behavior is bothering you, it’s okay to point it out and ask them to stop. But, avoid attacking your partner. You can say, “It drives me crazy when you throw your dirty socks all over the floor.” But avoid saying, “You’re such a slob. What’s your problem?”
Most people can accept that they might be doing something bothersome. However, that’s different from being personally attacked.
A happy marriage is important for your mental and physical health–and if you’ve got kids, theirs too.There are times when we all have to put our own needs aside and do whatever we can to strengthen our relationships. These tips will help you work toward a happy partnership as you give your marriage the time and attention it deserves.
Life’s true tragedy is that, when someone dies, the misfortune is not only the death itself but also the untapped potential and unrealized dreams that die with them. This “compounded loss” happens more often than not. Far too many of us spend 100% of our time on only 10% of who we are today, and can be tomorrow.
“According to the Bureau of Labor Statistics, many of us work eight hours per day, commute for at least one hour per day, spend at least two hours eating, watch TV for five hours each day and spend nearly two hours a day using a computer for leisure activity, such as online games, research or social media,” Riley notes. “That’s nearly 18 hours, which doesn’t even include the multiple hours needed for our evening slumber. Clearly, we spend more time on what we aren’tthan we do on who and what we are…and want to be.”
For high achievers in particular, there isn’t a problem understanding HOW to get things done but rather there are challenges balancing it all. So many successful people spend the majority of their time on one area of their life where they excel, but perpetually feel unfulfilled.
With this in mind, Riley offers these 9 methods to help high achievers tap into the other 90% of “who they are,” beyond “what they do,” and realize greater life balance, joy and fulfillment in kind:
Method 1: Healthy Living is about More Than Diet!
There is more to life than the race to achieve more money or a fancy job title. And, there is more to living healthfully than what food you ingest or what physical exercises you do.
Other lifestyle decisions, such as those related to marriage, parenting, and friendships, all factor into one’s healthy sense of self.
Healthy living requires being true to yourself and being truly “present” when you’re with loved ones. Healthy living is also a frame of mind.
If your thoughts are self-destructive, this negativity will manifest itself in your body through stress, anxiety and other adverse physical conditions, and can undermine your personal and professional relationships with others.
Method 2: Peace and a Positive Mind – Your Defender in the Face of Distractions
Cultivating and maintaining a peaceful life must be a goal of paramount importance. Distractions and life’s distresses both small and large will pull you away from this goal each and every time you allow it.
Your thoughts are the training ground and spring board for your overall disposition and perspective on life. Many accomplished people never pause to revel in or acknowledge their success. They are constantly striving for what’s next.
While not entirely a bad thing, when your desire to achieve becomes bigger than your desire to BE, your existence will be likened to a hamster running in an endless circle, never at peace and never at a point of rest.
Method 3: The Importance of Having a Giving Heart and Spirit
Most know that giving back to society and those in need is one of the most meaningful activities we can engage in. In fact, many very successful people believe that giving is directly tied to their continued success.
Having a giving heart and spirit not only creates more opportunities for you to provide for others, but doing so allows more opportunities for your continued success to manifest in your life, and others: what impacts one impacts us all.
Achievement and accomplishments come from the work of our hands and minds, but true success and fulfillment comes from giving of the heart.
Not just donating your time through charitable work or financial donations, but also allocating precious time to family and friends. Being present and accessible to loved ones is the ultimate gift for others…and yourself.
Method 4: Live in Your P.O.W.E.R ™
High achievers should strive to tap into their personal P.O.W.E.R., which is Perspective, Ownership, Wisdom, Engagement, and Reward. Perspective cultivates recognition of what is draining your life and what is enriching your life.
This leads to Ownership of your relationship with yourself and with others. It allows you to establish your personal boundaries and define what and where you are to give of yourself and your time. This understanding of your own truth is a major component of Wisdom, which is gained from how you implement your life experiences into your life and evolve your thinking and decisions through expanding your knowledge and good judgment. This enlightenment brings consistent Engagementin the quality of your life.
Your desire, energy, and personal encouragement will motivate you to commit yourself to stop spending 100% of your time on 10% of who you are – this is your Reward.
Method 5: Stop Working So You Can Maximize your Opportunities
When you are constantly working, you seldom recognize your achievements. Without taking these moments to recognize your accomplishments, you are constantly stretching for what’s next and never appreciating and enjoying what you have completed.
This cycle often leads to burn out, health issues, personal relationship issues, and low self esteem. And, many times, it does not have a clearly defined end of moment of victory. When you change your mindset from working to maximizing opportunities, you reposition your thought process and how you approach your life.
You are able to separate and segment your work from other areas of your life because maximizing the opportunity has a beginning and an end. You are quicker to recognize when to end or remove your self because you understand what you are spending your time on is meant to be an opportunity not a burden you spend time on with out benefit or value.
Method 6: Happy is a Choice; Contentment and Joy are Lifestyles
One of the definitions of the word overwhelmed is “to give too much of a thing.” When you truly desire to live a life that is fulfilled in all areas, you are destined to have more to do than you have the time, energy, and ability or help to accomplish or complete.
The feeling of being overwhelmed is when you have what you need and are overflowing with what you want. When you have so much success, opportunity, potential, clients, projects, options, prosperity that you can’t “handle” or manage everything, your reaction is that you are overwhelmed. So what about those times when you’re overwhelmed with challenges, struggles, health issues, and other life concerns?
Know the plan for your life is perfect and the struggles are never to defeat you but to make you stronger and uncover your true power. Surrender and find peace living in the overflow, joy and abundance of being overwhelmed.
Method 7: Building Lasting Confidence
Believe it or not, whatever you want is available to you if you have the confidence and belief that you can have what you want and that you deserve it. This does not mean confidence in our degrees, our knowledge, job titles, position, social status, etc.
Instead, it is about having a pure and honest confidence in the person you are. Many successful people have achieved career success through their fear of failure. And while such fear can be a powerful and effective motivator, it can also limit your sense of accomplishment and impede growth in other areas of your life. For many high achievers, confidence is built on external validations like applause, accolades, wins, or promotions. And their ensuring quest to feel this rush keeps them from being engaged in other areas of their lives.
True confidence should come from a life well lived and enjoyed…not the proverbial feathers in your cap.
Method 8: The Courage to be Faithful
Stepping out of your fears and into your greatness requires great courage. Sometimes we are so busy with the work of life that we don’t sit still and take the time to listen to our heart.
Being courageous means not allowing life to steal, kill, or destroy your dreams, hopes, aspirations, and plans but living in the now, the moment, the presence of your power to receive life, and the fullness of all life has to offer and even more abundantly. It takes courage to be honest with yourself, acknowledge your personal truth, and be present in your quest to live that truth.
The easiest thing for high achievers to do is be successful. But living in the fullness of who they are – and want to be – while also maintaining their success takes true grit.
Method 9: – Exponential Living
Exponential Living is achieved through excellence in your Personal, Spiritual, and Emotional health, and balance in all aspects of your life – with yourself and others. It is achieved by building and maintaining spirituality; loving and caring for yourself (hobbies, exercise, “me” time); spending quality time with and appreciating yourself and your family; recognizing your success; and living in your own truth.
When living exponentially you are comfortable with who you are, separate from what you do. It’s when you live in a state of true contentment, being present with yourself and others while also pursuing and maintaining excellence in all aspects of your life.
Often, high achievers are limited by their success because they are only living in the accomplishments in one area of their lives.
They have achieved or have the drive to achieve high levels of professional success but are not truly fulfilled with their lives overall. Or, they have reached their career goals but now know there are other facets of life they want to pursue but don’t know what/how/why/when.
Exponential Living gives such high achievers the power of being true to themselves and achieving a balance between work, family, friends, healthy living, and spiritual commitment to manifest a life that is genuinely complete and content.
Sheri Riley is the founder and Chief Partnership Strategist of GLUE, Inc. and creator of the Exponential Living program (www.exponentialliving.com) – a ground-breaking initiative that helps individuals create balance among life’s key areas in ways that promote a higher standard of excellence.