Queen Bee QT: Change Your Life With These Free Desert Meditations
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Faking It ‘Til You Make It on a Roller Coaster (to the Life of Your Dreams)
“Life is like a roller coaster, live it, be happy, enjoy life.” ~Avril Lavigne
I don’t know about you, but sometimes, when I need to understand a concept, a concrete example helps a lot. So, if you’re struggling to understand the concept of learning to create the life of your dreams, I hope that you’ll be able to find some connection to it through my own personal experience with a roller coaster.
It’s no joke–the first time I ever intentionally chose to change my life and recognized that I’d succeeded, I was only 9 years old–and it involved a roller coaster.
Change Your Mind, Change Your life: My Philosophy
As you may or may not be aware, I have a philosophy that has served me quite well: I believe that anyone can choose the life she wants if she does so intentionally. I believe that you bring about what you think about, that you get back what you put out there–karma, the law of attraction, the Golden Rule–call it whatever you want.
It works pretty consistently. It turns out that the way you choose to perceive any situation can and will affect the outcome.
The fact that my first memory of a conscious attempt and success at using this concept to my advantage happened before my 10th birthday is proof enough for me–but if that weren’t enough, the result was certainly a confirmation.
How the Roller Coaster Comes Into Play
So there I was, 9 years old and at Six Flags with friends–and not a care in the world–except, that is, for one thing: a horrible fear of roller coasters, upside-down rides and anything with a reputation for making one vomit.
I was so terrified of them that I felt like a big baby (remember, I was 9!), and I remember thinking: “I don’t want to feel like this. I wish I wasn’t so afraid to go on these rides…”
That day, I made a choice.
I decided that I was going to FAKE IT. (At least until I made it!)
Faking It Til You Make It: A Concrete Exanple
When I say fake it til you make it, I mean to behave AS IF what you want has already happened.
So, in the case of the roller coaster, I decided that day that I would PRETEND to love the roller coaster, and that I would pretend SO HARD that I WOULD figure out how to learn to love it.
And guess what? I totally did it–I faked it (acted happy when I wanted to scream–smiled and threw my arms up in the air while I laughed and cheered when I wanted to hold on and beg them to stop the ride.)
And then–the crazy thing.
It happened. That day. I learned to love the roller coaster, and became a bit of a junkie after awhile (the thrill of the perceived risk was kind of awesome, it turned out!!).
I mean, sure, at first, I was totally faking it. But by the end of the day, I truly GOT IT–the reason people loved roller coasters. It was not about being excited to have yourself all flipped upside-down and inside out; it was about overcoming the fear by throwing yourself into the experience.
Your Perception Defines Your Life
As a result of that momentary and seemingly insignificant thing, my 9-year-old self learned something that I’d carry with me for the rest of my life: that not only could I choose my own reaction and thus my experience, but by doing so, I could positively influence the outcome of my day and even my life.
True story.
So tell me, do you believe that you have the power to change your own life? If not, tell me why. If so, tell me about your own experiences that “proved it” for you!
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“QueenBeeing” can best be described as a lifestyle that begins with understanding and employing the art of being your true, authentic self and of manifesting the life of which you’ve always dreamed–but it’s also so much more.
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Queen Bee QT: What to Do When You Make a Mistake
“It’s always helpful to learn from your mistakes because then your mistakes seem worthwhile.” – Garry Marshall
I’m going to be really honest with you–when it comes to making mistakes, I’ve made my share. Probably more than my share–but the good news is that I am still alive, kicking and happier than I’ve ever been. And yet, I continue to make mistakes every now and again. But I’ve learned some things along the way that help me get through those tough post-mistake moments.
What To Do When You Make a Mistake
Taking a leap of faith helps you understand yourself better. Sometimes, though, the result isn’t what you were hoping for–but that doesn’t mean there was no value in trying. After all, you learned something from taking that leap and you moved toward your goal in the process, right?
And hey, more good news: while accepting your errors isn’t easy, it’s definitely possible.
Put these strategies into play the next time you make a mistake:
1. Admit it. As soon as you realize you’ve made an error, it’s wise to admit it. First admit it to yourself, and then to others who are involved. Although you may think that it will make you feel worse to own up to what you’ve done, you’ll actually feel relieved. Your sense of personal power will be renewed as you move forward and make peace.
2. Apologize if your mistake affected others. Accept that saying “I’m sorry” is an important aspect of the human condition. It’s likely you’ve received a well-deserved apology from someone that meant a lot to you.
- Tip: An honest and open apology delivered in a timely fashion can mend relationships and soothe personal difficulties. When apologizing, you can have the most impact if you look the person in the eye and avoid mincing words. Say something like, “I’m sorry I didn’t call you like I said I would. I realize you missed having dinner with your sister because you were waiting for my call.”
3. Promise to do better next time. Whether you vow to yourself or to the person you wronged, take the next step after apologizing by stating what you’ll do in the future. Even if no one else is involved, you can promise yourself to act differently the next time. Using the previous example, you could add, “The next time, I’ll call you as soon as I know my plans have changed.”
4. Move forward with renewed effort. After there’s been acknowledgement and an apology, you can proceed ahead toward your goals. You can now feel unfettered, as if you’re beginning anew. In a sense, you are.
5. Find the silver lining. As odd as it may sound, something positive may come out of your misstep. And this happens more often than you might expect.
6. Recognize that your mistakes open your eyes to new knowledge. Some information can only be gained by “tripping” over it—making an error. Much new knowledge can be discovered in the course of something going awry. After an error, ask yourself, “What have I learned from this experience?” With mistakes comes progress.
7. Take only the positive with you and leave the negative behind. In the past, you may have avoided confronting your error or apologizing for it. You might connect a lot of negative thoughts and feelings to making a mistake. Remind yourself that your faux pas aren’t all bad. Focus on the positive outcomes of your blunder and allow the negative to fall away.
Because we’re human beings, we’re bound to make mistakes. By following these suggestions, we can learn how to accept our errors and proceed on with a renewed strength and determination. Accept your mistakes and continue on your quest for a successful life!
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Queen Bee QT: Learn to Benefit from Your Mistakes
Supercharge Your Success: A Weekly Routine to Benefit From Your Mistakes
People who struggle to be successful frequently repeat the same mistakes over and over. The habit of repeating mistakes can easily be corrected. All you have to do is develop a weekly habit of examining your mistakes and coming up with better alternatives for the next time.
Just as a chain is limited by the strength of its weakest link, our success is limited by the quality of our worst decisions. Eliminating mistakes is a powerful way to become more successful in life.
Try this process for minimizing the prevalence of your mistakes:
Set aside some time once a week. Have a specific time each week that you use to look back and examine your week. Schedule it into your week just like anything else of high importance.
- Look back at all the important events from your week. Consider every important interaction and decision you made during the week.
- Reflect on your interactions with your family and the decisions you made related to them. How did you handle your kids? Did you have positive interactions with your partner?
- Think about your financial decisions. Include your spending and how you managed with paying your bills. Investing decisions can be included, too.
- What happened at work? How was your presentation? Did you hire or fire someone? Are you feuding with someone? Were you ever late for work? Did your boss yell at you?
- Examine your health. Did you eat nutritiously this week? Did you sleep well? Did you get enough exercise?
- Include anything else that seems important. Contemplate everything that’s important to you, including anything that involves your friends and neighbors.
- Ask yourself what you could have done better. Where did you make mistakes? Go back over your entire week and consider how each situation could have been managed more effectively.
- It’s similar to asking yourself what you would do if you could go back in time and live that experience all over again.
- Odds are that you’ll have the opportunity to experience a similar situation in the future. Most of our lives are filled with routines and habits. There’s not a lot of novelty from week to week.
- Look for trends in your behavior. We’re all prone to making similar mistakes again and again. Even in completely different situations, we tend to make the same sorts of mistakes.
- Are you assuming too much? Are you too impatient? Are you inconsiderate? Are you acting without getting enough information? Are you ignoring your family?
- If you can correct a trend in your decision-making, you can eliminate a lot of future errors.
- Visualize yourself handling the situation in a more effective manner. Try to find solutions to challenging situations. Then, see yourself in the same situation, only this time you’ll take a new approach. Visualize things working out well.
- This step is super powerful, so avoid skipping it. A few minutes can really make a huge difference.
- Think about what you did well, too! Recognize those things and resolve to continue responding in the same way to those situations. Keep the good stuff and change the bad.
Your success in life will be enhanced by leaps and bounds if you simply take the time to eliminate your mistakes. Each week, you’ll become more and more effective as you make fewer and fewer mistakes. Success isn’t all about doing spectacular things. It’s just as much about not making spectacular blunders.
Avoid making the same mistake twice. Recognize your shortcomings each week and banish them from your life.
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