What is your core wound? Narcissistic Abuse Recovery FAQ
As you go through the narcissistic abuse recovery process, one of the biggest breakthroughs you can have is to discover, understand and overcome your core wound – the biggest issue that’s holding you back in your life and preventing you from getting what you really want.
In today’s vlog extra, I’ll tell you what a core wound is and offer several examples – plus, I’ll help you start to discover yours.
July 6, 2016, something kind of unexpected happened to me – I accidentally found a connection with a whole bunch of other people across the world, who, luckily, included my kids.
In fact, I was far from alone – and within 24 hours of the game hitting the US app stores, the game had more active users than freaking Tinder!
Yeah, I’m talking about Pokemon Go, the app that has taken over your Facebook news feed and has already changed the lives of millions. But this one’s different than Candy Crush and all kinds of other games I never managed to get addicted to – it’s a whole other thing.
See, the way the game is played, it almost forces you to go out and move your butt a little, and to do so in places in the community around you.
You’re a Poke trainer and you are tasked with a few different things – including collecting/catching/hunting these little Pokemon creatures (monsters?) who you can then train and use to battle other players at the Pokemon gym.
But here is the reason I’m talking about this today – I believe that this app could literally change our society.
I’ve met neighbors I didn’t know before. I’ve run into all kinds of people that I couldn’t have or wouldn’t have ever run into – and I’ve got a whole new way to connect with my kids.
And what’s better is the latest news: apparently, people are reporting lots of benefits – in addition to the obvious benefits (moving your ass and getting into the community more often), there’s the whole mental health factor.
(Not to mention that local landmarks and businesses are seeing more traffic than ever – our St. Louis Zoo seeems to find itself busier than ever since that date).
And, while I’m brimming with ideas on how this app could change the whole world, I’m even more excited about the mental health part.
“In terms of the phenomena of people expressing the benefits of playing the game to their real-world mental health status, I think that’s very unique and it’s the first time I’ve ever seen anything like that,” Dr. John Grohol, the founder of Psych Central, told Engadget.
“The research is really, really clear on this, that the more you exercise, the more it would help decrease feelings of depression,” he told the tech news site. “It actually works as an anti-depressant and it has a really, pretty strong effect. It’s probably one of the most beneficial things a person with depression can do, especially if they’re not accessing other types of treatments, such as psychotherapy or medication.”
“That way of taking a break and letting the mind think about something different is better than smoking cigarettes or drinking alcohol, which is what a lot of people do to de-stress,” he said.
And, he added, in addition to making people less isolated, an augmented reality game like Pokemon Go does force people to go outside and exercise.
Maybe even better, if you’re hanging out at a Poke-stop and there are 10 or 20 other people there all catching Pokemon, guess what? You’ve got something to talk about.
Of course, it’s a well-documented fact that physical exercise is one of the best ways to combat depression, and almost every other mental health issue. And in addition, the social aspect and the whole changing your scene deal are also standard practice when it comes to getting through the tough times.
Some users say that the game has actually become a better treatment than anything their doctors could prescribe and anything their therapists recommended.
So that’s what I’ve got for today – how about you – are you playing? What do you think about this phenomenon? What other unique ways have you found to get through the hard times? Share your thoughts and experiences in the comments section and let’s discuss it.
“The reason we’re successful, darling? My overall charisma, of course.” ~Freddie Mercury
For some people, like the late, great, crazy-talented-genius Freddie Mercury, being charismatic is a gift.
They’re just born that way. We all know someone that everyone just seems to like – and maybe we wonder how they do that.
What if you aren’t naturally charismatic? Is it possible to become irresistible?
Why do some people just naturally get all the attention while others struggle to even get a supporting role in the movie of their own lives? It’s enough to make you want to scream.
But hey, don’t beat yourself up, if you can relate. You’re not weird or different – you just have your own talents and strengths.
And, I don’t know, the fact that you’re here, reading this article right now? Yeah, that pretty much tells me that one of your strengths is the ability to embrace and create change in your own life, so you’re on the right path. Nice work, friend!
Learn the secrets of irresistible people and use them to your own benefit.
If you’re not naturally one of those people, it might feel easy to just feel a little bit of jealousy or even to indulge in a little haterade. But don’t do that to yourself – there is a much better way to look at this whole thing.
See, the reason you might sometimes feel kind of murder-y toward people who are especially irresistible is that they are obviously getting the attention that you want on some level.
Sure they are – and that’s for a very simple reason. They’re not prettier or smarter or even better in any way, necessarily. It’s all about one simple thing.
Being charismatic can make life easier and more enjoyable.
Yep. It’s that simple. Life is better when you’re a charmer, an irresistible force of wonderful that no one can help but love.
Why is that, anyway?
Think of it this way. Imagine you’re standing outside a door, prepared to walk into a roomful of people. When you enter, you see that the room is filled with everyone you love, and the room bursts into applause as everyone lines up to hug you and catch up.
It feels wonderful when people are happy to see you, right? Of course it does! And, let’s not forget how much easier it is to navigate life when you’ve got plenty of love and support.
Your social life is better and others are more willing to be helpful – and all you have to do is learn to be sort of irresistible, also known as charismatic – you learn become instantly likeable.
Don’t worry if you’re not already there (or even close). I’ve got you covered – here’s where you can start, friend.
9 Habits of Highly Irresistible People
I’ve got some awesome news for you – you don’t have to be born charismatic. It’s actually an easy skill to develop, and one of the best ways I’ve found to create seriously positive changes in my life is to study what successful people (who have already made that change) are doing to get (and stay) where they are.
As a life coach and a ever-studying researcher of human nature, I can tell you that analyzing and emulating the basics of those changes is a super-effective way to create your own sort of blueprint plan to make the changes happen.
Regarding people who are considered “irresistible” or “charming” or even flat-out charismatic by their friends and family members, it turns out they all have a few things in common (in addition to a slightly less stressful life than those less “irresistible” people, obvs.).
So, I figured I’d save you a little time and put this together – here’s my list of the 9 habits of highly charismatic people. What would you add to it? Tell me in the comments section, below, or join us on Facebook to continue the discussion.
“See the things you want as already yours. Think of them as yours, as belonging to you, as already in your possession.”
These characteristics are commonly found in highly charismatic people with the most magnetic personalities:
Be empathetic. The ability to understand another’s feelings and point of view is invaluable. It’s frustrating when others fail to understand what we’re thinking and feeling. Be the person that makes the time and effort to get to the heart of the matter.
Be interesting. Only a weather buff wants to talk about the weather! People like to be fascinated and entertained. Boring others doesn’t result in getting more party invitations. The easiest way to have interesting conversations is to have an interesting life. Are you bored a lot of the time? If so, you’re probably boring others, too. Make your life a grand adventure!
Focus on the positive. Who doesn’t like positive, happy people? Being negative and pessimistic becomes tiresome. The people around you are affected by your words, actions, and moods. Make others feel good and they’ll associate those feelings with you.
Be present. A sure way to make someone feel insignificant is to fail to give them your full attention. Put away your phone and keep your eyes on the other person. Listen to what is being said. Anything else is rude and not appreciated.
Keep your word. If others don’t trust you, it makes it difficult for them to like you. Being honest and reliable creates the kind of trust necessary to build and sustain meaningful relationships. Do what you say you’re going to do.
Unless asked, keep your opinions to yourself. When people share their challenges, they already know what to do 90% of the time. They’re just looking for someone to listen and be sympathetic. Unsolicited advice is rarely welcome and can create feelings of resentment. Give advice only when requested.
Remember names. We all feel a little bit of pride when others remember and use our names. It’s also a little insulting when they don’t, even though names are among the most challenging items to remember. People tend to remember in a visual format. It’s not easy to visualize a name.
Do whatever is necessary to remember names and then use them in conversation. Those around you will appreciate it.
Make others feel good about themselves. Many people assume that being more charismatic is the result of being more impressive to others. However, it’s actually about making people feel more impressed with themselves.
If you can make someone feel better about their life and who they are, you’ll have a friend for life.
Build your confidence. Everyone likes to be around someone who’s confident. People that are nervous and uncomfortable tend to make others uncomfortable, too. Strive to find a place between arrogance and self-doubt. Do everything possible to feel good about yourself.
Live a life that fills you with pride. Wear clothes that make you feel great. Be proud of your accomplishments and what you have to offer the world.
If you desire to be more irresistible, you can develop the qualities that draw others to you. If you’re enjoyable and interesting to be around, you’ve already won half the battle. The other half consists of making others feel good about themselves.
Even the most disagreeable people can learn to be very charismatic.
One of the best ways to make life more enjoyable, to say the very least, is to be well-liked by others. What do you think?
About the book:
Collected and curated by life coach and author Angela Atkinson, this ebook is also a toolkit that contains everything you’ll need to identify your issues and begin to resolve them, one baby step at a time.
Could you use:
Practical and easy ways to create serious change in your life, right now.
Expert ideas for coping with stress and thriving despite it.
Self-care advice that will help to improve both your self-confidence and your relationships.
Advice on dealing with difficult people and repairing damaged relationships.
Tips for creating and enforcing personal boundaries.
Advice for loving yourself and truly accepting yourself so that you can realize your true potential.
An understanding of how your perception creates your reality.
Here’s a Preview Of What You’ll Learn Inside.
Heal Broken Relationships With This 4-Step Process to Increase Dialogue
Zap Stress With These 5 Tips to Increase Your Patience
Conquer Social Anxiety With These 5 Tips to Increase Your Courage
Become a Better Leader: 4 Steps to Boost Your E.Q.
8 Habits That Guarantee Success
7 Tricks to Boost Your Memory
4 Key Attitudes for a Happy Life
The Top 5 Ways to Nurture a Healthy Body Image
Get Off the Diet Roller Coaster: 6 Tips for Making Your Weight Loss Last
Top 10 Tips for Enhancing Your Emotional and Mental Health
18 Ways to be Happier
14 Intrinsic Motivation Secrets for Making Everything Better
7 Steps to Having a Great Day
Top 10 Strategies to Overcome Anger and Gain Peace
9 More Life Lessons You Weren’t Taught in School
5 Indicators of a True Friendship
6 Tips for Getting Through the Hard Times
This book is exactly what you’ve been looking for if you’re at a point in your life where you know you’re ready for some serious changes, but you’re not exactly sure where to start. It offers powerful and simple secrets, tricks and baby steps that will help take your life from not-so-great to over the moon.