I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again–getting the weight off does not fix your head. When you’re overweight or obese, it can feel like the solution–just getting off the weight in any way possible–but when you don’t fix the issues that caused the weight gain in the first place, it can be temporary.
Maybe you gain the weight back, maybe you succumb to another, lower-calorie addiction (studies have shown that people get addicted to sex, alcohol, drugs and more–all in an effort to avoid dealing with their issues), but in any case, it’s important to fix the psychological issues you’ve got going on while you’re working on getting your body in shape. You’ve got to get your head in the game before you can expect to be truly healed.
This is exactly why I started Project Blissful on some level–because I have lost and gained a ridiculous amount of weight over the years, but it never stuck until I figured out that I couldn’t just put a bandaid on my “issues”–the ones that sort of led me to gain the weight in the first place.
Besides being involved in a really toxic family situation for most of my life, I was also dealing with many of the same issues that we’ve all dealt with–low self-esteem, feelings of worthlessness and lack of concern for my personal well-being, among others.
But whatever cross you bear, you’ve got to figure out how to drop it off at the next stop if you’re ever going to get and keep the weight off.
Dr. Lavinia Rodriguez, a psychologist and expert in weight management who wrote “Mind Over Fat Maatters: Conquering Psychological Barriers to Weight Management,” says that while weight loss procedures like bypass surgery and gastric banding can lead to quick weight loss, it definitely does not solve the issue.
“It’s understandable why someone who’s struggled with obesity for years would place all their hopes on bariatric surgery. Many patients think it’s their last resort. (And in some cases, it may be),” Rodriguez wrote in a recent Tampa Bay Times article. “But advertisements gloss over the tough realities of bariatric surgery. And even when the facts are given, many people are so eager to lose weight, they ignore what they don’t want to hear.”
Rodriguez said that people need to know some important things about weight loss–most of all that if you have “psychological issues connected to disordered eating, bariatric surgery will not eliminate these problems.”
Even more importantly, when patients regain weight, it’s usually because of psychological issues, rather than physical ones.
And it’s not always the dark, deep issues that cause the problem, but sometimes simple things like your attitude about working out, being a perfectionist and other common issues.
Rodriguez agrees with what I’ve always said–it’s all in your head. When you address those psychological issues and learn to change your mind, you can achieve long-lasting results.
What do you think? Is getting your head straight what you need to do to keep the weight off? Share your thoughts and experiences in the comments section, below!
Angela Atkinson is a certified trauma counselor and the author of more than 20 books on narcissism, narcissistic abuse recovery, and related topics. A recognized expert on narcissism and narcissistic personality disorder who has studied and written extensively on narcissistic personality disorder and narcissistic abuse in toxic relationships since 2006, she has a popular narcissistic abuse recovery YouTube channel. Atkinson was inspired to begin her work as a result of having survived toxic relationships of her own.
Atkinson offers trauma-informed narcissistic abuse recovery coaching and has certifications in trauma counseling, life coaching, level 2 therapeutic model, CBT coaching, integrative wellness coaching, and NLP. She is a certified trauma support coach and certified family trauma professional. She also has a professional PTSD counseling certification. Her mission is to help those who have experienced the emotional and mental devastation that comes with narcissistic abuse in these incredibly toxic relationships to (re)discover their true selves, stop the gaslighting and manipulation, and move forward into their genuine desires – into a life that is exactly what they choose for themselves.
Along with her solution-focused life coaching experience, Atkinson’s previous career in journalism and research helps her to offer both accurate and understandable information for survivors of abuse in a simple-to-understand way that helps to increase awareness in the narcissistic abuse recovery community. Atkinson founded QueenBeeing.com Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Support, the SPANily Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Support Groups and the Life Makeover Academy.
She offers individual and group coaching for victims and survivors of narcissistic abuse at NarcissisticAbuseRecovery.Online.