After I went no-contact with my narcissist, a funny thing happened. I kind of got my life together (eventually) and I dropped more than 100 pounds.
When my PhD friend heard about this, she reached out to me and mentioned that she, too, found herself uncomfortably overweight after her narcissistic abuse experience.
And, she said, that “without any effort at all (no dieting),” she had managed to drop 40 or more pounds once she’d escaped – all of which she has kept off without effort since.
Like me, she said she just didn’t “see it” in the mirror – and that though she can look back and see it in old photos today, she really didn’t realize how heavy she’d become. She also noted that she sees a very sad and depressed look about her when she looks at those photos.
If you ask me, she was wearing her pain, just like I had been doing.
“During the marriage, there were many discards, and I did seem to lose significant amounts of weight during these phases, only to put the pounds back on when he would decide to re-cycle me,” she told me in an email, adding that she wondered if this was a pattern I observed in narcissistic relationships. “It would be interesting to see if there is a pattern of weight gain over the years of time spent with a narcissist.”
I agree with her, and I’m going to start with an informal poll.
POLL: In the comments below, please tell me: do you believe that weight gain is a side-effect of narcissistic abuse? Why or why not?
Share your thoughts and experiences and help me help you. Let’s dig into this research together, shall we?